So, looking at job ads in the UK.
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
I think a lot about all of these & I don't think your interpretations are wrong. They would all be red flags for me, especially 'busy, fast-paced environment', 'proactive self-starter', and 'motivated & committed' - they all feel like they would suck me dry and give zero support.
(Possibly because I have worked in all these jobs & that's exactly what happened.)
I want job listings that say "Job. Duties are A, B, C. Pay is X.'
Bonus if they give the vibe 'We're all reasonable & professional adults here & expect you to be too'.
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I think a lot about all of these & I don't think your interpretations are wrong. They would all be red flags for me, especially 'busy, fast-paced environment', 'proactive self-starter', and 'motivated & committed' - they all feel like they would suck me dry and give zero support.
(Possibly because I have worked in all these jobs & that's exactly what happened.)
I want job listings that say "Job. Duties are A, B, C. Pay is X.'
Bonus if they give the vibe 'We're all reasonable & professional adults here & expect you to be too'.
Totally. There are plenty without this sort of language so it really stands out, too.
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
oh yeah. there's a lot of consistent red-flag language job posts.
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts Competitive remuneration:- we pay as little as possible.
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I think a lot about all of these & I don't think your interpretations are wrong. They would all be red flags for me, especially 'busy, fast-paced environment', 'proactive self-starter', and 'motivated & committed' - they all feel like they would suck me dry and give zero support.
(Possibly because I have worked in all these jobs & that's exactly what happened.)
I want job listings that say "Job. Duties are A, B, C. Pay is X.'
Bonus if they give the vibe 'We're all reasonable & professional adults here & expect you to be too'.
@Her_Doing @DarkSheepArts with the current place and general 2020s IT bullshittery, I could really do with a couple years in something that's "here's what you do every day, it's all fully known, we'll pay you"
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts See, this is how I often interpret this too. I thought I was being narrowminded and/or negative about it
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@DarkSheepArts See, this is how I often interpret this too. I thought I was being narrowminded and/or negative about it
I think they should be taken at face value - for my sector at least, there are enough jobs that don't use that language that I always think it's a bad sign when they do.
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts There are some good places, but it's got so they're surprising.
(and the effort to make them not-good is of course not an accident; nothing consistent is an accident.)
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I think a lot about all of these & I don't think your interpretations are wrong. They would all be red flags for me, especially 'busy, fast-paced environment', 'proactive self-starter', and 'motivated & committed' - they all feel like they would suck me dry and give zero support.
(Possibly because I have worked in all these jobs & that's exactly what happened.)
I want job listings that say "Job. Duties are A, B, C. Pay is X.'
Bonus if they give the vibe 'We're all reasonable & professional adults here & expect you to be too'.
@Her_Doing @DarkSheepArts My favorite is when the business says "we're a family!", as if most families are not deeply dysfunctional
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts “organised and self-assured” - it’s total chaos over here and Nancy from accounting will actively try to break you
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@Her_Doing @DarkSheepArts My favorite is when the business says "we're a family!", as if most families are not deeply dysfunctional
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts "like family": Your supervisor will downplay your needs if you are disabled and without children, compared to the parents, and furthermore will act like they appointed themself your new parent. Also you are 12; that's how the theory works, right?
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts I have never understood the supposed allure of "fast-paced." Being a go-getter rarely gets rewarded, but rather just increases your workload so that you now work the jobs of two people, saving the company a ton of money.
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts This feels accurate.
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@DarkSheepArts I have never understood the supposed allure of "fast-paced." Being a go-getter rarely gets rewarded, but rather just increases your workload so that you now work the jobs of two people, saving the company a ton of money.
I've always wondered if it's in there so that when you complain that you're being expected to do three people's jobs, they can be like "we warned you it was fast paced and busy..."
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts "We're a family" - we'll never let you get a union in here
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts The "proactive self starter" one made me smile. A few years back I was interviewed for a very undefined role purely because I had been employed for the firm whose software they were migrating to.
Given my experiance of the project management at that previous firm was akin to watching squirrels on acid bobsledding, I declined the job offer.
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts@mastoart.social these are great translations
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So, looking at job ads in the UK. Mentally translating some of the jargon:
"Busy, fast paced environment" - Impossible workloads
"Friendly team" - welcome back to secondary school, fit in or die
"Creative environment" - we absolutely do not plan a single thing we do
"Proactive self starter" - We don't understand this job but we're hoping you do
"Motivated and committed" - you live here now.
(I'm probably being unfair, I'm sure there are some good places)
@DarkSheepArts I interviewed with a CTO that described themselves as "an ideas engine" I mentally translated this to "bell end" Another gem was being asked what my superpower was? My thought was that I'm not fucking eight years old!
