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CIRCLE WITH A DOT

  1. Home
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  3. For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech!

For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech!

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  • connychiwa@mastodon.nzC connychiwa@mastodon.nz

    @sundogplanets As you're in Aotearoa, have you come through the famous town of Bulls? They've taken bovine puns to the next level. Not only is the entire town plastered with bull imagery and statues but there's heaps of punny signage, like 'udderly unbeliev-a-bull'. It's really quite a sight to behold.
    This is their website: https://www.bulls.kiwi/

    connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
    connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
    connynasch@mastodon.social
    wrote last edited by
    #136

    @ConnyChiwa don't forget bullshit 😁 @sundogplanets

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    • sundogplanets@mastodon.socialS sundogplanets@mastodon.social

      For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)

      peaoperdido@datasci.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
      peaoperdido@datasci.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
      peaoperdido@datasci.social
      wrote last edited by
      #137

      @sundogplanets In Brazil we say "the cow went to the swamp" when something goes wrong

      "A vaca foi para o brejo"

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      • sundogplanets@mastodon.socialS sundogplanets@mastodon.social

        For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)

        isol@mastodon.auI This user is from outside of this forum
        isol@mastodon.auI This user is from outside of this forum
        isol@mastodon.au
        wrote last edited by
        #138

        @sundogplanets

        Hey diddle diddle
        The cat and the fiddle
        The cow jumped over the moon

        The fuckweasel's Starlinks
        got caught on its horns
        and Kessler Syndrome
        popped SpaceX like a balloon.

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        • sundogplanets@mastodon.socialS sundogplanets@mastodon.social

          For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)

          yncke@comicscamp.clubY This user is from outside of this forum
          yncke@comicscamp.clubY This user is from outside of this forum
          yncke@comicscamp.club
          wrote last edited by
          #139

          @sundogplanets

          Well, not really a figure of speech, but still one of my favourite sayings about cows : "Als de koe naar Rome gaat, ontmoet ze al gauw prikkeldraad".

          When the cow goes to Rome, she quickly encounters barbed wire.

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          • sundogplanets@mastodon.socialS sundogplanets@mastodon.social

            For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)

            ponderstibbons@mas.toP This user is from outside of this forum
            ponderstibbons@mas.toP This user is from outside of this forum
            ponderstibbons@mas.to
            wrote last edited by
            #140

            @sundogplanets

            This is a great thread. It reminded me of the old
            "Cows With Guns - The Original Animation"

            https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FQMbXvn2RNI

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            • brunogirin@mastodon.me.ukB brunogirin@mastodon.me.uk

              @sundogplanets In French: "Il pleut comme vache qui pisse", "It's raining like a pissing cow".

              connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
              connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
              connynasch@mastodon.social
              wrote last edited by
              #141

              @brunogirin or "oh vache" for suprise + you speak a whole lot of cow - South African for talking shit. @sundogplanets

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              • quincy@chaos.socialQ quincy@chaos.social

                @sundogplanets

                Two German ones:

                "Die Kuh vom Eis holen" ("getting the cow off the ice") - resolving a difficult situation

                "Das geht auf keine Kuhhaut" (this goes on no cow-skin) - expressing mild outrage

                (sorry, no puns involved)

                quincy@chaos.socialQ This user is from outside of this forum
                quincy@chaos.socialQ This user is from outside of this forum
                quincy@chaos.social
                wrote last edited by
                #142

                @sundogplanets

                But since you asked for puns:

                - Why is it difficult to hit a cow?
                - Because it's a mooing target.

                (disclaimer: don't hit cows.)

                ccferrie@mastodon.ieC 1 Reply Last reply
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                • pencilears@mastodon.eternalaugust.comP pencilears@mastodon.eternalaugust.com

                  @amin @sundogplanets @skinnylatte there's actually a lot of YouTube videos of people playing music for cows because cows love live music.

                  This said, I bet it was this video

                  https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qs_-emj1qR4

                  connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                  connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                  connynasch@mastodon.social
                  wrote last edited by
                  #143

                  @pencilears @amin @sundogplanets @skinnylatte 😁

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                  • sundogplanets@mastodon.socialS sundogplanets@mastodon.social

                    For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)

                    luksfarris@ruby.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                    luksfarris@ruby.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                    luksfarris@ruby.social
                    wrote last edited by
                    #144

                    @sundogplanets in Portuguese, when a person is a cheapskate, we call them "cow-fisted" or "cow hands"

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                    • E ef@mastodon.bsd.cafe

                      @urlyman @sundogplanets I herd you.

                      connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                      connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                      connynasch@mastodon.social
                      wrote last edited by
                      #145

                      @EF @urlyman @sundogplanets 😂

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                      • ivor@social.ivor.orgI ivor@social.ivor.org

                        @sundogplanets obviously the classic... "Consider a spherical cow..."

                        srvanderplas@datavis.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                        srvanderplas@datavis.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                        srvanderplas@datavis.social
                        wrote last edited by
                        #146

                        @ivor @sundogplanets a spherical massless frictionless cow!

                        artharg@mastodon.nlA 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • gustavinobevilacqua@mastodon.cisti.orgG gustavinobevilacqua@mastodon.cisti.org

                          @sundogplanets

                          "You can't eat a steak and later complain there is no more milk".

                          In a press release I sold that for "ancient wisdom" but actually I invented it 10 minutes before.

                          connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                          connynasch@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                          connynasch@mastodon.social
                          wrote last edited by
                          #147

                          @GustavinoBevilacqua @sundogplanets however, I have heard that before. It must be a vague memory in your unconscious that surfaced - it happens to me quite a lot.

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                          • skjeggtroll@mastodon.onlineS skjeggtroll@mastodon.online

                            @sundogplanets

                            From Norway:

                            "'Smaken er som baken,' sa kjerringa som kyssa kua" ('Tastes differ', said the wife who kissed the cow.)

                            "Kua gløymar ho har vore kalv" (The cow forgets she was once a calf -- typically said when someone is complaining about or berating the youth.)

                            "Det var ikkje eit kuverd" ([The loss] wasn't the value of a cow -- "It could have been worse.")

                            "Som ei ku i grøn eng" (Like a cow in a green meadow -- having it good, being in a good position.)

                            unhammer@mastodon.socialU This user is from outside of this forum
                            unhammer@mastodon.socialU This user is from outside of this forum
                            unhammer@mastodon.social
                            wrote last edited by
                            #148

                            @skjeggtroll @sundogplanets there are more at https://naob.no/ordbok/ku#:~:text=UTTRYKK

                            "glo som en ku på en låvedør" (staring like a cow at a (new) barn door = staring without understanding, as cows don't notice your hard work)

                            "komme som kua til øksehammeren" (arrive like the cow to the ax-hammer = arrive at the right moment)

                            "som en ku i havsnød" (like a cow lost at sea / in danger of drowning = be in deep difficulties)

                            And my favourite:

                            "som en ku i aulaen" (like a cow in the auditorium = out of place)

                            unhammer@mastodon.socialU 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • sundogplanets@mastodon.socialS sundogplanets@mastodon.social

                              For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)

                              jweslley@ruby.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                              jweslley@ruby.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                              jweslley@ruby.social
                              wrote last edited by
                              #149

                              @sundogplanets in Brazil we use ‘the cow went to the swamp’ when something went wrong.

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • sundogplanets@mastodon.socialS sundogplanets@mastodon.social

                                For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)

                                sanpan@mas.toS This user is from outside of this forum
                                sanpan@mas.toS This user is from outside of this forum
                                sanpan@mas.to
                                wrote last edited by
                                #150

                                @sundogplanets There´s no business like cow business.

                                Fun fact: most people think it´s "show business", but the song is from the musical "Annie Get Your Gun", which was about the Wild West and people back then weren´t called cow-boys/-girls for nothing...so, totally misheard and please don´t fact check me. I never lie!

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                                • anna@mathstodon.xyzA anna@mathstodon.xyz

                                  @sundogplanets In Dutch we say "Dat is een waarheid als een koe", which literally translates to "That is a truth like a cow", meaning that it is *very* true. I guess b/c you cannot avoid a cow when it is in front of you.

                                  wnd@fosstodon.orgW This user is from outside of this forum
                                  wnd@fosstodon.orgW This user is from outside of this forum
                                  wnd@fosstodon.org
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #151

                                  @anna @sundogplanets do Dutch horses bolt though?

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                                  • unhammer@mastodon.socialU unhammer@mastodon.social

                                    @skjeggtroll @sundogplanets there are more at https://naob.no/ordbok/ku#:~:text=UTTRYKK

                                    "glo som en ku på en låvedør" (staring like a cow at a (new) barn door = staring without understanding, as cows don't notice your hard work)

                                    "komme som kua til øksehammeren" (arrive like the cow to the ax-hammer = arrive at the right moment)

                                    "som en ku i havsnød" (like a cow lost at sea / in danger of drowning = be in deep difficulties)

                                    And my favourite:

                                    "som en ku i aulaen" (like a cow in the auditorium = out of place)

                                    unhammer@mastodon.socialU This user is from outside of this forum
                                    unhammer@mastodon.socialU This user is from outside of this forum
                                    unhammer@mastodon.social
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #152

                                    @skjeggtroll @sundogplanets also:

                                    "som to raude kyr" (like two red cows = besties)

                                    "då var kua selt" (so the cow was sold = no turning back now)

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                                    • jollyorc@social.5f9.deJ jollyorc@social.5f9.de

                                      @JonasJRichter @sundogplanets there is a whole low-german folk song "Herrn Pastor sien Kauh" with countless verses of what the whole village gets from the carcass of that priests cow that just died - from the fire department getting a new pot of greese for their truck, the sexton a new bell pull, the painter a new brush, the local beauty a new set of hymen, the marching band a new drumskin, the old lady a new set of dentures to Napoleon getting a flea and the neighbour state the head as heraldic symbol for the flag...

                                      jonasjrichter@mastodon.pnpde.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
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                                      jonasjrichter@mastodon.pnpde.social
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #153

                                      @jollyorc @sundogplanets

                                      Ooh, I vaguely remember the title now that you mention it!

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • sundogplanets@mastodon.socialS sundogplanets@mastodon.social

                                        For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)

                                        jonasjrichter@mastodon.pnpde.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                        jonasjrichter@mastodon.pnpde.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                        jonasjrichter@mastodon.pnpde.social
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #154

                                        @sundogplanets

                                        What's persistence? - Give a cow a sugar cube and lick its rear (anus) until it tastes sweet.

                                        (from Germany)

                                        Can also be used without the "persistence" bit to describe futility (or stupidity).

                                        1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • sundogplanets@mastodon.socialS sundogplanets@mastodon.social

                                          For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)

                                          lumiworx@mastodon.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                                          lumiworx@mastodon.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                                          lumiworx@mastodon.social
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #155

                                          @sundogplanets

                                          "Please remember to tip your cow."

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