For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech!
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@sundogplanets I've always thought "It's a moo point" (from an episode of Friends) deserved to catch on
@diazona @sundogplanets "It's a cow's opinion. It doesn't matter. It's moo"
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@futzle @sundogplanets And everyone who stopped to look was told to moo on.
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For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)
@sundogplanets Do male cows count?
"Calves should not play with the ox, they are outmatched in horns."
I've also heard sayings along the line of "he's all lasso and no bull" / "all hat and no cattle". Meaning someone who talks big but can't back it up.
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Years ago I heard this joke (not ideal in writing, but I hope it works. Imagine the answer as a mooing sound.)
"Do you think you got BSE?" - "Nnnnnoooooooooooo."There's a German saying "Das geht auf keine Kuhhaut" meaning "that's too much, unheard of, beyond belief". Apparently the literal meaning is "that does not fit on (the parchment made from) a cow's skin".
@JonasJRichter @sundogplanets there is a whole low-german folk song "Herrn Pastor sien Kauh" with countless verses of what the whole village gets from the carcass of that priests cow that just died - from the fire department getting a new pot of greese for their truck, the sexton a new bell pull, the painter a new brush, the local beauty a new set of hymen, the marching band a new drumskin, the old lady a new set of dentures to Napoleon getting a flea and the neighbour state the head as heraldic symbol for the flag...
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@sundogplanets
there's one in french:"il pleut comme vache qui pisse"
(it's raining like a cow peeing)
@bituur_esztreym @sundogplanets “es regnet Hunde und Katzen”, "il pleut des cordes”, "it´s raining cats and dogs"
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For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)
@sundogplanets In Swedish, we often use "There is no cow on the ice", which means that there is still enough time to act without panic. The full expression is "There is no cow on the ice until her ass is out there" but hardly anyone knows that which makes it a bit cryptic.
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For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)
@sundogplanets Ask Not For Whom The Bull Moos
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@sundogplanets As you're in Aotearoa, have you come through the famous town of Bulls? They've taken bovine puns to the next level. Not only is the entire town plastered with bull imagery and statues but there's heaps of punny signage, like 'udderly unbeliev-a-bull'. It's really quite a sight to behold.
This is their website: https://www.bulls.kiwi/@ConnyChiwa don't forget bullshit
@sundogplanets -
For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)
@sundogplanets In Brazil we say "the cow went to the swamp" when something goes wrong
"A vaca foi para o brejo"
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For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)
Hey diddle diddle
The cat and the fiddle
The cow jumped over the moonThe fuckweasel's Starlinks
got caught on its horns
and Kessler Syndrome
popped SpaceX like a balloon. -
For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)
Well, not really a figure of speech, but still one of my favourite sayings about cows : "Als de koe naar Rome gaat, ontmoet ze al gauw prikkeldraad".
When the cow goes to Rome, she quickly encounters barbed wire.
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For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)
This is a great thread. It reminded me of the old
"Cows With Guns - The Original Animation" -
@sundogplanets In French: "Il pleut comme vache qui pisse", "It's raining like a pissing cow".
@brunogirin or "oh vache" for suprise + you speak a whole lot of cow - South African for talking shit. @sundogplanets
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Two German ones:
"Die Kuh vom Eis holen" ("getting the cow off the ice") - resolving a difficult situation
"Das geht auf keine Kuhhaut" (this goes on no cow-skin) - expressing mild outrage
(sorry, no puns involved)
But since you asked for puns:
- Why is it difficult to hit a cow?
- Because it's a mooing target.(disclaimer: don't hit cows.)
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@amin @sundogplanets @skinnylatte there's actually a lot of YouTube videos of people playing music for cows because cows love live music.
This said, I bet it was this video
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For no reason at all, please give me your favourite cow-related figures of speech! (Stuff like "No use crying over spilled milk" or "until the cows come home", puns extremely welcome)
@sundogplanets in Portuguese, when a person is a cheapskate, we call them "cow-fisted" or "cow hands"
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@urlyman @sundogplanets I herd you.
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@sundogplanets obviously the classic... "Consider a spherical cow..."
@ivor @sundogplanets a spherical massless frictionless cow!
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"You can't eat a steak and later complain there is no more milk".
In a press release I sold that for "ancient wisdom" but actually I invented it 10 minutes before.
@GustavinoBevilacqua @sundogplanets however, I have heard that before. It must be a vague memory in your unconscious that surfaced - it happens to me quite a lot.
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From Norway:
"'Smaken er som baken,' sa kjerringa som kyssa kua" ('Tastes differ', said the wife who kissed the cow.)
"Kua gløymar ho har vore kalv" (The cow forgets she was once a calf -- typically said when someone is complaining about or berating the youth.)
"Det var ikkje eit kuverd" ([The loss] wasn't the value of a cow -- "It could have been worse.")
"Som ei ku i grøn eng" (Like a cow in a green meadow -- having it good, being in a good position.)
@skjeggtroll @sundogplanets there are more at https://naob.no/ordbok/ku#:~:text=UTTRYKK
"glo som en ku på en låvedør" (staring like a cow at a (new) barn door = staring without understanding, as cows don't notice your hard work)
"komme som kua til øksehammeren" (arrive like the cow to the ax-hammer = arrive at the right moment)
"som en ku i havsnød" (like a cow lost at sea / in danger of drowning = be in deep difficulties)
And my favourite:
"som en ku i aulaen" (like a cow in the auditorium = out of place)
