There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining.
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I really hate how "dude" is no longer something cool.
Re: The Big Lebowski and that excellent 1980 album by Quincy Jones…
@airwhale Jeff Bridges is *The* Dude. And he abides.
Everyone else? Not so much.
So, yeah, it has become a moniker of derision. And it's still a *gendered* moniker. Something I wish the younger generation of women would realize.
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@emilymbender Ouch!
We need to fix this here but I'm not sure how. If I can help in any way please let me know.
@lisamelton @emilymbender Would other dudes calling them out be helpful?
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@lisamelton @emilymbender Would other dudes calling them out be helpful?
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@emilymbender I love your work and I am sorry that some servers will not come and get their men
If it's the account I think it may be, the account either no longer exists, or is at least hidden from public view.
@davey_cakes @emilymbender -
There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining.
This is, of course, asking the wrong question: It's asking "How do I defend myself against accusation?" rather than "How do I interact with people (esp women sharing their expertise) respectfully?"
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There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining.
This is, of course, asking the wrong question: It's asking "How do I defend myself against accusation?" rather than "How do I interact with people (esp women sharing their expertise) respectfully?"
@emilymbender What’s sad is that I think the root issue is the constant anxiety associated with social media and being read in bad/confused faith, and rather than lean into the “social” aspect of SM and just continue conversations with those that treat you like a person while accepting that flawed human beings will misread you or you’ll misspeak/be wrong but within the tension lies growth, this guy wants the final cheat code to get out of experiencing social disapproval.
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There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining.
This is, of course, asking the wrong question: It's asking "How do I defend myself against accusation?" rather than "How do I interact with people (esp women sharing their expertise) respectfully?"
@emilymbender @yo_bj looking forward to the same person mansplaining what is or is not sealioning, where by looking forward I mean :headdesk:
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@emilymbender What’s sad is that I think the root issue is the constant anxiety associated with social media and being read in bad/confused faith, and rather than lean into the “social” aspect of SM and just continue conversations with those that treat you like a person while accepting that flawed human beings will misread you or you’ll misspeak/be wrong but within the tension lies growth, this guy wants the final cheat code to get out of experiencing social disapproval.
@WhiteCatTamer I read him differently---I don't think he has any anxiety. I think he wants to "prove" that I am wrong for calling someone out for mansplaining (and then calling him out for mansplaining the mansplaining).
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@WhiteCatTamer I read him differently---I don't think he has any anxiety. I think he wants to "prove" that I am wrong for calling someone out for mansplaining (and then calling him out for mansplaining the mansplaining).
@emilymbender Ah, gotcha; swinging right out of the gate. Ugh. Sorry, that’s tiresome.
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There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining.
This is, of course, asking the wrong question: It's asking "How do I defend myself against accusation?" rather than "How do I interact with people (esp women sharing their expertise) respectfully?"
Every time I experience an exceptional woman I am reminded of the tremendous waste of human potential existing in deeply misogynistic cultures.
Having said that, back in my day, pre Internet Usenet, we already figured this out - dont feed the trolls.
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Every time I experience an exceptional woman I am reminded of the tremendous waste of human potential existing in deeply misogynistic cultures.
Having said that, back in my day, pre Internet Usenet, we already figured this out - dont feed the trolls.
@goss Ah, yet more victim blaming. Just the cherry on top that was needed.
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@emilymbender I did not know the term sealioning until just now. I've learned something from you today. Thanks.
@Bodling @emilymbender same! TIL sealioning. TY!
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Every time I experience an exceptional woman I am reminded of the tremendous waste of human potential existing in deeply misogynistic cultures.
Having said that, back in my day, pre Internet Usenet, we already figured this out - dont feed the trolls.
@goss @emilymbender I think I shall take this advice.
Consider yourself muted.
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@goss Ah, yet more victim blaming. Just the cherry on top that was needed.
@emilymbender @goss Mansplained victim blaming, no less. SMFH.
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@goss Ah, yet more victim blaming. Just the cherry on top that was needed.
@emilymbender
Not at all.
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There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining.
This is, of course, asking the wrong question: It's asking "How do I defend myself against accusation?" rather than "How do I interact with people (esp women sharing their expertise) respectfully?"
@emilymbender those people deserve the mute or block button
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There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining.
This is, of course, asking the wrong question: It's asking "How do I defend myself against accusation?" rather than "How do I interact with people (esp women sharing their expertise) respectfully?"
@emilymbender I sometimes have problems getting social cues or "read the room". Also, I sometimes might tend to infodumping.
My takeaway on many things it to simply hold back and shut up. I have no idea if that's always the right thing to do, but that's what I took away from it.
My #mansplaining takeaway is: never explain anything to anyone, unless being explicitly asked to.
I honestly wonder how that works for shy people or those who don't want to seem dumb for asking. (Could also be me).
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@emilymbender I sometimes have problems getting social cues or "read the room". Also, I sometimes might tend to infodumping.
My takeaway on many things it to simply hold back and shut up. I have no idea if that's always the right thing to do, but that's what I took away from it.
My #mansplaining takeaway is: never explain anything to anyone, unless being explicitly asked to.
I honestly wonder how that works for shy people or those who don't want to seem dumb for asking. (Could also be me).
@emilymbender Would never call myself #actuallyautistic as I never was diagnosed or anything, but there are tendencies. And all this social stuff sometimes is kinda hard for me.
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@emilymbender Would never call myself #actuallyautistic as I never was diagnosed or anything, but there are tendencies. And all this social stuff sometimes is kinda hard for me.
@emilymbender Shit. Did I just #mansplain this? Nobody asked me. Serious question, I have no clue.
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a useful flowchart for the guy,
little hint his decision is bottom left.
Prof. Sam Lawler (@sundogplanets@mastodon.social)
Attached: 1 image I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences.... https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart
Mastodon (mastodon.social)
@wobweger @emilymbender i posted this this week and ended up with a bunch of bad faith takes from men who completely missed the point. The internet is a tiresome place.
