<![CDATA[There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining.]]>There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining.

This is, of course, asking the wrong question: It's asking "How do I defend myself against accusation?" rather than "How do I interact with people (esp women sharing their expertise) respectfully?"

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/topic/4d8a9370-cd53-40d8-994a-837731e80182/there-s-a-person-on-here-sealioning-in-my-mentions-about-mansplaining-and-demanding-criteria-for-adjudicating-whether-any-individual-comment-is-or-is-not-mansplaining.RSS for NodeThu, 30 Apr 2026 09:54:36 GMTFri, 17 Apr 2026 18:20:38 GMT60<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 06:09:33 GMT]]>@wobweger @emilymbender

I get a feeling that the flowchart could benefit from an additional arrow from the title to the “Probably”, marked “if you have to ask”

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://sociale.network/users/oblomov/statuses/116424217284572901https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://sociale.network/users/oblomov/statuses/116424217284572901Sat, 18 Apr 2026 06:09:33 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 06:03:55 GMT]]>@wobweger @emilymbender i posted this this week and ended up with a bunch of bad faith takes from men who completely missed the point. The internet is a tiresome place.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://fediscience.org/users/michcampbell/statuses/116424195127191166https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://fediscience.org/users/michcampbell/statuses/116424195127191166Sat, 18 Apr 2026 06:03:55 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 05:55:39 GMT]]>@emilymbender Shit. Did I just this? Nobody asked me. Serious question, I have no clue. 😭

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/Bebef/statuses/116424162647953325https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/Bebef/statuses/116424162647953325Sat, 18 Apr 2026 05:55:39 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 05:51:01 GMT]]>@emilymbender Would never call myself as I never was diagnosed or anything, but there are tendencies. And all this social stuff sometimes is kinda hard for me.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/Bebef/statuses/116424144388908576https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/Bebef/statuses/116424144388908576Sat, 18 Apr 2026 05:51:01 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 05:49:28 GMT]]>@emilymbender I sometimes have problems getting social cues or "read the room". Also, I sometimes might tend to infodumping.

My takeaway on many things it to simply hold back and shut up. I have no idea if that's always the right thing to do, but that's what I took away from it.

My takeaway is: never explain anything to anyone, unless being explicitly asked to.

I honestly wonder how that works for shy people or those who don't want to seem dumb for asking. (Could also be me).

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/Bebef/statuses/116424138333647614https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/Bebef/statuses/116424138333647614Sat, 18 Apr 2026 05:49:28 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 04:59:31 GMT]]>@emilymbender those people deserve the mute or block button

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mymasto.com/users/VWDasher/statuses/116423941946968968https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mymasto.com/users/VWDasher/statuses/116423941946968968Sat, 18 Apr 2026 04:59:31 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 02:19:40 GMT]]>@emilymbender
Not at all.
Bye

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://c.im/users/goss/statuses/116423313336010520https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://c.im/users/goss/statuses/116423313336010520Sat, 18 Apr 2026 02:19:40 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 01:44:36 GMT]]>@emilymbender @goss Mansplained victim blaming, no less. SMFH.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mstdn.social/users/ZDL/statuses/116423175470700495https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mstdn.social/users/ZDL/statuses/116423175470700495Sat, 18 Apr 2026 01:44:36 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 01:44:02 GMT]]>@goss @emilymbender I think I shall take this advice.

Consider yourself muted.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mstdn.social/users/ZDL/statuses/116423173245183715https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mstdn.social/users/ZDL/statuses/116423173245183715Sat, 18 Apr 2026 01:44:02 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Sat, 18 Apr 2026 00:32:56 GMT]]>@Bodling @emilymbender same! TIL sealioning. TY!

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/classwario/statuses/116422893636585280https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/classwario/statuses/116422893636585280Sat, 18 Apr 2026 00:32:56 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 23:58:14 GMT]]>@goss Ah, yet more victim blaming. Just the cherry on top that was needed.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://dair-community.social/users/emilymbender/statuses/116422757195799777https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://dair-community.social/users/emilymbender/statuses/116422757195799777Fri, 17 Apr 2026 23:58:14 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 23:04:54 GMT]]>@emilymbender

Every time I experience an exceptional woman I am reminded of the tremendous waste of human potential existing in deeply misogynistic cultures.

Having said that, back in my day, pre Internet Usenet, we already figured this out - dont feed the trolls.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://c.im/users/goss/statuses/116422547482540965https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://c.im/users/goss/statuses/116422547482540965Fri, 17 Apr 2026 23:04:54 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 22:56:53 GMT]]>@emilymbender Ah, gotcha; swinging right out of the gate. Ugh. Sorry, that’s tiresome. 😕

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.online/users/WhiteCatTamer/statuses/116422515991141645https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.online/users/WhiteCatTamer/statuses/116422515991141645Fri, 17 Apr 2026 22:56:53 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 22:48:27 GMT]]>@WhiteCatTamer I read him differently---I don't think he has any anxiety. I think he wants to "prove" that I am wrong for calling someone out for mansplaining (and then calling him out for mansplaining the mansplaining).

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://dair-community.social/users/emilymbender/statuses/116422482849681253https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://dair-community.social/users/emilymbender/statuses/116422482849681253Fri, 17 Apr 2026 22:48:27 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 22:34:59 GMT]]>@emilymbender @yo_bj looking forward to the same person mansplaining what is or is not sealioning, where by looking forward I mean :headdesk:

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://glammr.us/users/chronodm/statuses/116422429884290982https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://glammr.us/users/chronodm/statuses/116422429884290982Fri, 17 Apr 2026 22:34:59 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 22:22:29 GMT]]>@emilymbender What’s sad is that I think the root issue is the constant anxiety associated with social media and being read in bad/confused faith, and rather than lean into the “social” aspect of SM and just continue conversations with those that treat you like a person while accepting that flawed human beings will misread you or you’ll misspeak/be wrong but within the tension lies growth, this guy wants the final cheat code to get out of experiencing social disapproval.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.online/users/WhiteCatTamer/statuses/116422380695309976https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.online/users/WhiteCatTamer/statuses/116422380695309976Fri, 17 Apr 2026 22:22:29 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:49:28 GMT]]>@emilymbender

Very insightful distinction

I'm sorry you're getting all this bullshit

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://zeroes.ca/users/NilaJones/statuses/116422250919517213https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://zeroes.ca/users/NilaJones/statuses/116422250919517213Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:49:28 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:29:11 GMT]]>If it's the account I think it may be, the account either no longer exists, or is at least hidden from public view.
@davey_cakes @emilymbender

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://infosec.exchange/users/BenAveling/statuses/116422171118700432https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://infosec.exchange/users/BenAveling/statuses/116422171118700432Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:29:11 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:09:24 GMT]]>@michaelgemar Yes! 💯

It certainly couldn't hurt.

@emilymbender

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/lisamelton/statuses/116422093326870385https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/lisamelton/statuses/116422093326870385Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:09:24 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:07:07 GMT]]>@lisamelton @emilymbender Would other dudes calling them out be helpful?

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://cosocial.ca/ap/users/116274777763908831/statuses/116422084368747955https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://cosocial.ca/ap/users/116274777763908831/statuses/116422084368747955Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:07:07 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:03:43 GMT]]>@airwhale Jeff Bridges is *The* Dude. And he abides.

Everyone else? Not so much.

So, yeah, it has become a moniker of derision. And it's still a *gendered* moniker. Something I wish the younger generation of women would realize.

@emilymbender

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/lisamelton/statuses/116422070965439186https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/lisamelton/statuses/116422070965439186Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:03:43 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:00:13 GMT]]>@lisamelton @emilymbender

I really hate how "dude" is no longer something cool.

Re: The Big Lebowski and that excellent 1980 album by Quincy Jones…

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://beige.party/users/airwhale/statuses/116422057240105390https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://beige.party/users/airwhale/statuses/116422057240105390Fri, 17 Apr 2026 21:00:13 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 20:41:47 GMT]]>@emilymbender hmmm… If only someone would publish a flow chart or decision tree that assist in learning?

Oh. Right. (Scrolls up…)

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://vmst.io/users/millardjk/statuses/116421984764115024https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://vmst.io/users/millardjk/statuses/116421984764115024Fri, 17 Apr 2026 20:41:47 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to There's a person on here sealioning in my mentions about mansplaining and demanding criteria for adjudicating whether any individual comment is or is not mansplaining. on Fri, 17 Apr 2026 20:41:11 GMT]]>@emilymbender I did not know the term sealioning until just now. I've learned something from you today. Thanks.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://deacon.social/users/Bodling/statuses/116421982365488414https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://deacon.social/users/Bodling/statuses/116421982365488414Fri, 17 Apr 2026 20:41:11 GMT