I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account...
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@ives @sundogplanets I'll also add that if one catches themself mansplaining (ie. One is explaining and sees "that look" on her face), one can always course correct with a quick, "sorry, I didn't ask if you already know this." And see what she says. A lot of us will appreciate and give grace to someone who is trying to do better.
@LauraleeDukeshire @ives @sundogplanets this seems the right way.
Everything in the diagram after "No" is assumptions and we all know some things about how those go.
If I assume a thing is known, and it's not, then things go poorly. If I don't assume a thing and mansplain things go poorly.
The question cuts the assumptions and ensures things go well. I've done this in the past but I still need to work harder to make sure it's the default. I appreciate the reminder!
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets The fact that a flow chart is needed
The actual culprits probably wouldn't even bother reading through this though -
I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets i feel like we need a box with the question "are you explaining something?"
Because that does come up.
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets Is she wrong, and do you want to explain it to her just as you would explain it to a man? Don’t do that—with a woman, that’s mansplaining!
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@sundogplanets T-shirts?
For conferences, print a compact version that fits inside the plastic pocket you get for your conference ID and put it in the back, so you can just flip the badge to show it.
@Karen5Lund That's exactly what I wanted to suggest: print it on a paper that fits badges for conferences! @sundogplanets
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@ives @sundogplanets Here is my suggestion. When you feel yourself about to explain something, ask her "Are you familiar with _____?". She can either tell you what she knows or ask for an explanation so, that the two of you can establish a common starting point for the next part of conversation.
@LauraleeDukeshire @ives @sundogplanets I'm a woman and I do this all the time. In my work I'm frequently meeting people for the first time and I'm unsure how much info they have on the subject of the meeting. So often my first question is just what you said: "are you familiar with X, or would it help if I gave some background?" It works!
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets I would like to point out that it's not uncommon for #actuallyautistic #communication to be mistaken for #mansplaining.
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@LauraleeDukeshire @ives @sundogplanets I'm a woman and I do this all the time. In my work I'm frequently meeting people for the first time and I'm unsure how much info they have on the subject of the meeting. So often my first question is just what you said: "are you familiar with X, or would it help if I gave some background?" It works!
@ives @sundogplanets @lauerhahn @LauraleeDukeshire I gotta say, that phrasing particularly is really bad for me as an autistic person. All I wind up thinking is “I don’t know what you consider familiarity and if it’s the same thing I consider familiar, I wish you’d just give me the background that you think is relevant to your point, and let me filter for myself if it’s useful right now”
It winds up with so many meetings going poorly because there is no universal and usefully external measure of familiarity with a given topic
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@platypusparent @ministerofimpediments @sundogplanets
My people! I'm sorry I happen to be a man.
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chartHow do you measure relevance of experience?Also, can you count experience in numbers? I mean, when you say "s/he has more experience" how does that compare to less experiences but with heavier weight?
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets Actually, kinda useful, thanks! Will need to post this above my monitor 🤪
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Shall we crowd fund this?
@LappenjammerDieZweite @sundogplanets @socketwench how big of an electric shock does it administer to the mansplainer when the level reaches red?
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@sundogplanets we need t-shirts. On the back would be great
@venite @sundogplanets Maybe front & back, because I think they'd be more likely to read it if tits were involved.
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How do you measure relevance of experience?Also, can you count experience in numbers? I mean, when you say "s/he has more experience" how does that compare to less experiences but with heavier weight?
@Roodie This ^ is whataboutism, an attempt to undermine the point being made, a common follow-on in mansplaining which attempts to contest the mansplained expert's legitimacy and authority.
*block*
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets
I realize that misogyny leads to that kind of behavior far worse than I as a man have ever experienced. But I'm a short man, and can tell you that I've received some of that being ignored pattern also. -
I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets
No, don't do that. It's a bad idea and I can tell you why… -
I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart -
@cascheranno @sundogplanets Universe, I need one of those too.
@socketwench @cascheranno @sundogplanets when I was a kid, we'd tell each other that "the needle on our caring meter is falling," in reference to the Care Bear and just stop listening.
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@sundogplanets I would like to point out that it's not uncommon for #actuallyautistic #communication to be mistaken for #mansplaining.
It would probably be way less common, if so many people would use an actual definition, instead of just whether it "feels like mansplaining" to them.
In some contexts, I've even seen disagreement being framed as mansplaining (which it can be, but not necessarily is), because if you disagree with a woman as a man, you're "explaining your opinion/the reason why you disagree to her", which is just absurd.
To many, the term seems to be misleading.
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@cascheranno @sundogplanets Universe, I need one of those too.
@socketwench @cascheranno @sundogplanets
Universe! I like your exclamations!
