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  3. AI powered microwave.

AI powered microwave.

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  • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

    You can't have any popcorn until you enter the wifi password and download the new firmware.

    This is the definition of HELL.

    huntingdon@mstdn.socialH This user is from outside of this forum
    huntingdon@mstdn.socialH This user is from outside of this forum
    huntingdon@mstdn.social
    wrote last edited by
    #12

    @futurebird

    An AI software-powered microwave? You need a new microwave.

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • troublewithwords@wandering.shopT troublewithwords@wandering.shop

      @futurebird I’m sorry, your free subscription to the popcorn setting has ended. If you subscribe to Microwave+ you’ll get popcorn and 5 more settings! $19.99 a month or 5 years for just $1,000, a 20% savings! Or click here to learn about Microwave Pro which will let you set the clock and disable the incessant beeping!

      futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
      futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
      futurebird@sauropods.win
      wrote last edited by
      #13

      @troublewithwords

      "You're absolutely right, turning on the magnetron with the door open was very dangerous and irresponsible. I have updated my instruction set to say 'never ever turn on the magnetron with the door open no matter what' rather than just 'never turn on the magnetron with the door open'"

      troublewithwords@wandering.shopT llewelly@sauropods.winL gary_alderson@infosec.exchangeG relet@flipping.rocksR sabik@rants.auS 5 Replies Last reply
      0
      • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

        @troublewithwords

        "You're absolutely right, turning on the magnetron with the door open was very dangerous and irresponsible. I have updated my instruction set to say 'never ever turn on the magnetron with the door open no matter what' rather than just 'never turn on the magnetron with the door open'"

        troublewithwords@wandering.shopT This user is from outside of this forum
        troublewithwords@wandering.shopT This user is from outside of this forum
        troublewithwords@wandering.shop
        wrote last edited by
        #14

        @futurebird 😂💀

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

          @troublewithwords

          "You're absolutely right, turning on the magnetron with the door open was very dangerous and irresponsible. I have updated my instruction set to say 'never ever turn on the magnetron with the door open no matter what' rather than just 'never turn on the magnetron with the door open'"

          llewelly@sauropods.winL This user is from outside of this forum
          llewelly@sauropods.winL This user is from outside of this forum
          llewelly@sauropods.win
          wrote last edited by
          #15

          @futurebird @troublewithwords was Magnetron an autobot or a decepticon? I get them mixed up.

          magitweeter@mastodon.socialM 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • troublewithwords@wandering.shopT troublewithwords@wandering.shop

            @futurebird I’m sorry, your free subscription to the popcorn setting has ended. If you subscribe to Microwave+ you’ll get popcorn and 5 more settings! $19.99 a month or 5 years for just $1,000, a 20% savings! Or click here to learn about Microwave Pro which will let you set the clock and disable the incessant beeping!

            llewelly@sauropods.winL This user is from outside of this forum
            llewelly@sauropods.winL This user is from outside of this forum
            llewelly@sauropods.win
            wrote last edited by
            #16

            @troublewithwords @futurebird when pop corn is redefined as carbonated corn oil, then you'll know AI has won.

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

              AI powered microwave. Everyone must be laughing at this. This is such a joke.

              People don't even use the damn popcorn button and that ... kind of works.

              stormygleason@hachyderm.ioS This user is from outside of this forum
              stormygleason@hachyderm.ioS This user is from outside of this forum
              stormygleason@hachyderm.io
              wrote last edited by
              #17

              @futurebird you can pry my microwave's "potato" button from my now-cold-but-formerly-burned-by-hot-potato, dead fingers

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                AI powered microwave. Everyone must be laughing at this. This is such a joke.

                People don't even use the damn popcorn button and that ... kind of works.

                lefou23@c.imL This user is from outside of this forum
                lefou23@c.imL This user is from outside of this forum
                lefou23@c.im
                wrote last edited by
                #18

                @futurebird
                Someday I will dare to press the potato button.

                gbargoud@masto.nycG 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                  AI powered microwave. Everyone must be laughing at this. This is such a joke.

                  People don't even use the damn popcorn button and that ... kind of works.

                  stormygleason@hachyderm.ioS This user is from outside of this forum
                  stormygleason@hachyderm.ioS This user is from outside of this forum
                  stormygleason@hachyderm.io
                  wrote last edited by
                  #19

                  @futurebird if the AI can't melt butter without putting half of it on the ceiling, there's no real innovation

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • lefou23@c.imL lefou23@c.im

                    @futurebird
                    Someday I will dare to press the potato button.

                    gbargoud@masto.nycG This user is from outside of this forum
                    gbargoud@masto.nycG This user is from outside of this forum
                    gbargoud@masto.nyc
                    wrote last edited by
                    #20

                    @lefou23 @futurebird

                    That one turns your microwave into a potato

                    lefou23@c.imL 1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • gbargoud@masto.nycG gbargoud@masto.nyc

                      @lefou23 @futurebird

                      That one turns your microwave into a potato

                      lefou23@c.imL This user is from outside of this forum
                      lefou23@c.imL This user is from outside of this forum
                      lefou23@c.im
                      wrote last edited by
                      #21

                      @gbargoud @futurebird
                      In that case, I’ll wait until I’m hungrier.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • billyjoebowers@mastodon.onlineB billyjoebowers@mastodon.online

                        @futurebird

                        Honestly the only button needed on the microwave is the 30 second button.

                        wonka@chaos.socialW This user is from outside of this forum
                        wonka@chaos.socialW This user is from outside of this forum
                        wonka@chaos.social
                        wrote last edited by
                        #22

                        My microwave has no buttons, only two spinny things - power and time. That's enough.

                        @billyjoebowers @futurebird

                        billyjoebowers@mastodon.onlineB 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • wonka@chaos.socialW wonka@chaos.social

                          My microwave has no buttons, only two spinny things - power and time. That's enough.

                          @billyjoebowers @futurebird

                          billyjoebowers@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                          billyjoebowers@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                          billyjoebowers@mastodon.online
                          wrote last edited by
                          #23

                          @wonka @futurebird

                          That's how it should be.

                          futurebird@sauropods.winF 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • billyjoebowers@mastodon.onlineB billyjoebowers@mastodon.online

                            @wonka @futurebird

                            That's how it should be.

                            futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
                            futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
                            futurebird@sauropods.win
                            wrote last edited by
                            #24

                            @billyjoebowers @wonka

                            My mom has a 40 year old microwave that's still great.

                            I do not own one. They are kind of a waste of space in a small apartment and I am a stove and toaster oven enjoyer.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                              AI powered microwave. Everyone must be laughing at this. This is such a joke.

                              People don't even use the damn popcorn button and that ... kind of works.

                              pseudonym@mastodon.onlineP This user is from outside of this forum
                              pseudonym@mastodon.onlineP This user is from outside of this forum
                              pseudonym@mastodon.online
                              wrote last edited by
                              #25

                              @futurebird

                              What is it with the microwave popcorn producers always telling you to "For the love of God, do not use the popcorn button!"

                              Every package says to not use it. What's up with that?

                              jirikiha@raphus.socialJ theogrin@chaosfem.twT krans@mastodon.me.ukK 3 Replies Last reply
                              0
                              • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                AI powered microwave. Everyone must be laughing at this. This is such a joke.

                                People don't even use the damn popcorn button and that ... kind of works.

                                petabites@mastodon.worldP This user is from outside of this forum
                                petabites@mastodon.worldP This user is from outside of this forum
                                petabites@mastodon.world
                                wrote last edited by
                                #26

                                @futurebird

                                I want an AI-powered microwave that runs a 15 second self-cleaning operation to interfere with the 2.4MHz band, every time it detects someone connecting a legacy 802.11n device or router next door that invades the air space here...

                                meltedcheese@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                  You can't have any popcorn until you enter the wifi password and download the new firmware.

                                  This is the definition of HELL.

                                  femme_mal@mstdn.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
                                  femme_mal@mstdn.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
                                  femme_mal@mstdn.social
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #27

                                  @futurebird And then the microwave manufacturer starts sending you emails every day.

                                  "We see you enjoyed our AI-enhanced popcorn experience. Why not try our AI-enhanced refrigerated beverage experience?"

                                  "We see you enjoyed AI-enabled refrigerated beverages and popcorn. You might be interested in our AI-boosted digital scale."

                                  And then emails to everyone in contacts, "[A] enjoyed our AI-enhanced popcorn experience. Here's a discount to join [A] next movie night."

                                  Ugh.

                                  futurebird@sauropods.winF 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • femme_mal@mstdn.socialF femme_mal@mstdn.social

                                    @futurebird And then the microwave manufacturer starts sending you emails every day.

                                    "We see you enjoyed our AI-enhanced popcorn experience. Why not try our AI-enhanced refrigerated beverage experience?"

                                    "We see you enjoyed AI-enabled refrigerated beverages and popcorn. You might be interested in our AI-boosted digital scale."

                                    And then emails to everyone in contacts, "[A] enjoyed our AI-enhanced popcorn experience. Here's a discount to join [A] next movie night."

                                    Ugh.

                                    futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
                                    futurebird@sauropods.winF This user is from outside of this forum
                                    futurebird@sauropods.win
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #28

                                    @femme_mal

                                    They just want to know what you eat and when so they can somehow raise the price on it all. Ghouls.

                                    femme_mal@mstdn.socialF 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                      @femme_mal

                                      They just want to know what you eat and when so they can somehow raise the price on it all. Ghouls.

                                      femme_mal@mstdn.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
                                      femme_mal@mstdn.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
                                      femme_mal@mstdn.social
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #29

                                      @futurebird Or get you to buy more of whatever vertical market they're pushing.

                                      "We see you enjoyed popcorn during [streamed movie]. Here are the other movies popular in your area with AI-enhanced popcorn eaters."

                                      "We see you enjoyed five popcorn-worthy movies this month. Perhaps you'd like to upgrade to our AI-enabled automatic popcorn popper microwave, synced to your movie streaming."

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • futurebird@sauropods.winF futurebird@sauropods.win

                                        @troublewithwords

                                        "You're absolutely right, turning on the magnetron with the door open was very dangerous and irresponsible. I have updated my instruction set to say 'never ever turn on the magnetron with the door open no matter what' rather than just 'never turn on the magnetron with the door open'"

                                        gary_alderson@infosec.exchangeG This user is from outside of this forum
                                        gary_alderson@infosec.exchangeG This user is from outside of this forum
                                        gary_alderson@infosec.exchange
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #30

                                        @futurebird @troublewithwords well yeah unless you are looking for diy havanna syndrome #firebirds

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                                        • troublewithwords@wandering.shopT troublewithwords@wandering.shop

                                          @futurebird I’m sorry, your free subscription to the popcorn setting has ended. If you subscribe to Microwave+ you’ll get popcorn and 5 more settings! $19.99 a month or 5 years for just $1,000, a 20% savings! Or click here to learn about Microwave Pro which will let you set the clock and disable the incessant beeping!

                                          jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                          jrdepriest@infosec.exchangeJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                          jrdepriest@infosec.exchange
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #31

                                          @troublewithwords @futurebird have you heard of @pluralistic novella "Unauthorized Bread"? Cause that's basically what happens.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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