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  3. I'm curious about the intersection between autistic folks here and #ENM (Ethical Non Monogamy).

I'm curious about the intersection between autistic folks here and #ENM (Ethical Non Monogamy).

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  • minego@pdx.socialM minego@pdx.social

    @AutisticDoctorStruggles It has also allowed us both to be so much more open and honest with each other. For so long we avoided talking about any desires or needs that could possibly trigger jealousy.

    But, now that we understand that we both feel the same and that we have ways to explore these feelings and desires safely, we can be more open.

    @dyani

    dyani@social.coopD This user is from outside of this forum
    dyani@social.coopD This user is from outside of this forum
    dyani@social.coop
    wrote last edited by
    #25

    @minego @AutisticDoctorStruggles that's so awesome to hear. I'm happy for you two. I wish I hadn't been born into a life that gave me so much trauma I have to willingly fix within myself in order to experience fuller happiness

    minego@pdx.socialM 1 Reply Last reply
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    • energetic_nova@mastodon.socialE energetic_nova@mastodon.social

      @minego

      Certain people dont know how to gain consent from my partner. Her history of being abused as a child is relevant to the current decision.

      People dont mean to. She is just naturally pleasing as a person and it stops being ethical.

      energetic_nova@mastodon.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
      energetic_nova@mastodon.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
      energetic_nova@mastodon.social
      wrote last edited by
      #26

      @minego

      There is basically one trans woman I would trust her with and that person is firm on the no relationships ever cause she trusts no one. Adore and trust her tho. Cause she has strong consent language.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • energetic_nova@mastodon.socialE energetic_nova@mastodon.social

        @minego

        Yeah. Im clicked no and autistic. Cause it been a while. And I am less open do to other people. Not anything my partner has done. I would allow her with a trusted trans woman but I am protective of her from certain jackass forces.

        minego@pdx.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
        minego@pdx.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
        minego@pdx.social
        wrote last edited by
        #27

        @Energetic_Nova Thanks. I think my biggest take away from this is that we tend to be more willing to reject the default assumptions about what relationships are and what is and isn't okay in a relationship.

        That can take countless different forms though, and the beautiful thing about that is that it can more properly fit the needs and desires of the people in a relationship.

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        • energetic_nova@mastodon.socialE energetic_nova@mastodon.social

          @minego

          Certain people dont know how to gain consent from my partner. Her history of being abused as a child is relevant to the current decision.

          People dont mean to. She is just naturally pleasing as a person and it stops being ethical.

          minego@pdx.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
          minego@pdx.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
          minego@pdx.social
          wrote last edited by
          #28

          @Energetic_Nova I'm sorry to hear that, but it sounds like she is lucky to have an understanding and supportive partner to help.

          The E in ENM is the most important part.

          energetic_nova@mastodon.socialE 1 Reply Last reply
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          • dyani@social.coopD dyani@social.coop

            @minego @AutisticDoctorStruggles that's so awesome to hear. I'm happy for you two. I wish I hadn't been born into a life that gave me so much trauma I have to willingly fix within myself in order to experience fuller happiness

            minego@pdx.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
            minego@pdx.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
            minego@pdx.social
            wrote last edited by
            #29

            @dyani I wish that for all of us!

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • minego@pdx.socialM minego@pdx.social

              @Energetic_Nova I'm sorry to hear that, but it sounds like she is lucky to have an understanding and supportive partner to help.

              The E in ENM is the most important part.

              energetic_nova@mastodon.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
              energetic_nova@mastodon.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
              energetic_nova@mastodon.social
              wrote last edited by
              #30

              @minego

              Pretty much.

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • minego@pdx.socialM minego@pdx.social

                I'm curious about the intersection between autistic folks here and #ENM (Ethical Non Monogamy).

                gemini6ice@hachyderm.ioG This user is from outside of this forum
                gemini6ice@hachyderm.ioG This user is from outside of this forum
                gemini6ice@hachyderm.io
                wrote last edited by
                #31

                @minego i put do not practice but I wouldn’t object if a partner needed it. I’m just single af

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                • minego@pdx.socialM minego@pdx.social

                  I'm curious about the intersection between autistic folks here and #ENM (Ethical Non Monogamy).

                  bel_tamtu@meemu.orgB This user is from outside of this forum
                  bel_tamtu@meemu.orgB This user is from outside of this forum
                  bel_tamtu@meemu.org
                  wrote last edited by
                  #32

                  @minego Autistic, technically never been monogamous. Learned about poly thanks to furries and the Internet before my first relationship. I currently only have one major partner (and one formerly major partner I am in somewhat less contact with these days) but sie has many partners hirself and I am open to more and am meeting/flirting with people. (I am also aromantic so I sometimes get weird about getting closer to people and it can take me a while.)

                  1 Reply Last reply
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                  • minego@pdx.socialM minego@pdx.social

                    I'm curious about the intersection between autistic folks here and #ENM (Ethical Non Monogamy).

                    minego@pdx.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                    minego@pdx.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                    minego@pdx.social
                    wrote last edited by
                    #33

                    I know this isn't a very large sample size, but it seems from this that autistic folks are more than twice as likely to practice ENM.

                    That matches my own observations very closely too.

                    Anyway, I thought it was an interesting correlation.

                    iwein@mas.toI 1 Reply Last reply
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                    • minego@pdx.socialM minego@pdx.social

                      I know this isn't a very large sample size, but it seems from this that autistic folks are more than twice as likely to practice ENM.

                      That matches my own observations very closely too.

                      Anyway, I thought it was an interesting correlation.

                      iwein@mas.toI This user is from outside of this forum
                      iwein@mas.toI This user is from outside of this forum
                      iwein@mas.to
                      wrote last edited by
                      #34

                      @minego also, your poll responders are majority autistic, which makes me question selection and priming.

                      1 Reply Last reply
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