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CIRCLE WITH A DOT

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  3. I woke up still pondering @girlonthenet's lamentation (I think; https://mastodon.social/@girlonthenet/116353766078817354), that while lots of people enjoy her sex blog, few people boost her toots about it.

I woke up still pondering @girlonthenet's lamentation (I think; https://mastodon.social/@girlonthenet/116353766078817354), that while lots of people enjoy her sex blog, few people boost her toots about it.

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  • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

    I suspect that it comes down to a mix of:

    * stigma about sex as pleasure / being embarrassed about what others here might think

    * concerns relating to professional expectations and obligations

    * sex as being in the sphere of one's private life

    I can understand each of these, and why they might lead to a "like" rather than a "boost".

    None of them inhibit paying or tipping someone, as a thank you for their work though, which is another way of being supportive.

    jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ This user is from outside of this forum
    jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ This user is from outside of this forum
    jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.uk
    wrote last edited by
    #67

    @neil
    There is possibly another reason that you haven't considered that I am definitely guilty of.

    I get fed up of boosts from people boosting stuff from people that I already follow cluttering up my timeline and I generally tend to assume that because I follow all the cool people that everyone I follow also follows them, so I don't boost that much.

    I should perhaps re-evaluate my approach because I have discovered many cool people and things from people boosting people I don't already follow.

    neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN dan@mastodon.durrans.comD 2 Replies Last reply
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    • jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.uk

      @neil
      There is possibly another reason that you haven't considered that I am definitely guilty of.

      I get fed up of boosts from people boosting stuff from people that I already follow cluttering up my timeline and I generally tend to assume that because I follow all the cool people that everyone I follow also follows them, so I don't boost that much.

      I should perhaps re-evaluate my approach because I have discovered many cool people and things from people boosting people I don't already follow.

      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
      wrote last edited by
      #68

      @jamesb Ooh, interesting. Yes, you are right, I had not considered that.

      And this may be where different people have different experiences - I find loads of interesting people tooting loads of interesting things, based on what other people have boosted.

      I do appreciate the ability to turn off boots for a given person, though.

      jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ 1 Reply Last reply
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      • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

        @jamesb Ooh, interesting. Yes, you are right, I had not considered that.

        And this may be where different people have different experiences - I find loads of interesting people tooting loads of interesting things, based on what other people have boosted.

        I do appreciate the ability to turn off boots for a given person, though.

        jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ This user is from outside of this forum
        jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ This user is from outside of this forum
        jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.uk
        wrote last edited by
        #69

        @neil
        What would be useful in a Fedi client would be the ability to hide the boosts of accounts you already follow. That would certainly solve that problem, but then it would also hide people boosting their own old stuff which can occasionally be interesting.

        dan@mastodon.durrans.comD 1 Reply Last reply
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        • jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.uk

          @neil
          There is possibly another reason that you haven't considered that I am definitely guilty of.

          I get fed up of boosts from people boosting stuff from people that I already follow cluttering up my timeline and I generally tend to assume that because I follow all the cool people that everyone I follow also follows them, so I don't boost that much.

          I should perhaps re-evaluate my approach because I have discovered many cool people and things from people boosting people I don't already follow.

          dan@mastodon.durrans.comD This user is from outside of this forum
          dan@mastodon.durrans.comD This user is from outside of this forum
          dan@mastodon.durrans.com
          wrote last edited by
          #70

          @jamesb yes I am chuckling at having the gall to boost this toot. *snigger*

          jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ 1 Reply Last reply
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          • dan@mastodon.durrans.comD dan@mastodon.durrans.com

            @jamesb yes I am chuckling at having the gall to boost this toot. *snigger*

            jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ This user is from outside of this forum
            jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ This user is from outside of this forum
            jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.uk
            wrote last edited by
            #71

            @dan
            But nobody follows me because I'm not one of the Fediverse cool kids so that doesn't quite work.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.uk

              @neil
              What would be useful in a Fedi client would be the ability to hide the boosts of accounts you already follow. That would certainly solve that problem, but then it would also hide people boosting their own old stuff which can occasionally be interesting.

              dan@mastodon.durrans.comD This user is from outside of this forum
              dan@mastodon.durrans.comD This user is from outside of this forum
              dan@mastodon.durrans.com
              wrote last edited by
              #72

              @jamesb @neil @ivory has a Hide Duplicate Boosts feature I think…

              Link Preview Image
              1 Reply Last reply
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              • joykill@mastodon.socialJ joykill@mastodon.social

                @alexisbushnell
                Hosting social media while British, a prosecutable offense...

                That's truly sad and I can see why someone who hosts a server would think about those considerations, but as a user I don't think posting adult content is prosecutable in the UK yet, is it? Provided the adult content is consensual, not stolen, etc.

                Maybe having an alt account in a non-British server for the adult stuff could be an option, while keeping the local community posts in the British servers?

                @neil

                alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                alexisbushnell@toot.wales
                wrote last edited by
                #73

                @joykill @neil as with most things, it's complicated, but the Online Safety Act created a lot of fear and uncertainty among a lot of people because it's, afaik, quite vague and confusing.

                Also most kink is illegal in the UK so hosting that actually is illegal, even if consensual and done safely.

                neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN 1 Reply Last reply
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                • alexisbushnell@toot.walesA alexisbushnell@toot.wales

                  @joykill @neil as with most things, it's complicated, but the Online Safety Act created a lot of fear and uncertainty among a lot of people because it's, afaik, quite vague and confusing.

                  Also most kink is illegal in the UK so hosting that actually is illegal, even if consensual and done safely.

                  neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                  neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                  neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
                  wrote last edited by
                  #74

                  @alexisbushnell @joykill

                  > most kink is illegal in the UK

                  I am rather sceptical of this!

                  Some, for sure, but I'd be surprised by "most"!

                  joykill@mastodon.socialJ jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ philpem@digipres.clubP 3 Replies Last reply
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                  • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                    @alexisbushnell @joykill

                    > most kink is illegal in the UK

                    I am rather sceptical of this!

                    Some, for sure, but I'd be surprised by "most"!

                    joykill@mastodon.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                    joykill@mastodon.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                    joykill@mastodon.social
                    wrote last edited by
                    #75

                    @neil @alexisbushnell

                    Given the very vibrant kink scene in London, I also am rather skeptical of this, but I would be interested to hear your experiences if you have any first or second-hand knowledge of people in the UK getting in trouble with the law for sharing or hosting consensual kink content online.

                    alexisbushnell@toot.walesA neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN 2 Replies Last reply
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                    • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                      I woke up still pondering @girlonthenet's lamentation (I think; https://mastodon.social/@girlonthenet/116353766078817354), that while lots of people enjoy her sex blog, few people boost her toots about it.

                      I follow and chat with quite a lot of sex positive / sex-related people here, and many have expressed similar sentiments. It must be demoralising.

                      I don't have good ideas here, but it would be such a shame to lose this wonderful diverse friendly bunch of creative people.

                      mnd999@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                      mnd999@mastodon.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                      mnd999@mastodon.social
                      wrote last edited by
                      #76

                      @neil @girlonthenet as there’s no algorithm, there doesn’t seem much point boosting things unless you have followers.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • joykill@mastodon.socialJ joykill@mastodon.social

                        @neil @alexisbushnell

                        Given the very vibrant kink scene in London, I also am rather skeptical of this, but I would be interested to hear your experiences if you have any first or second-hand knowledge of people in the UK getting in trouble with the law for sharing or hosting consensual kink content online.

                        alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                        alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                        alexisbushnell@toot.wales
                        wrote last edited by
                        #77

                        @joykill @neil
                        Apologies if this is way more than you were anticipating/wanted but...

                        sources: I am a UK based kinkster in the scene for 20 years who also runs community events & is actively involved in community safety.

                        Also a UK based lawyer who is also a kinkster and has writings on Fetlife about this along with the legal realities of being actively engaged in kink in the UK.
                        Sources from his writing:

                        1/

                        alexisbushnell@toot.walesA 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • alexisbushnell@toot.walesA alexisbushnell@toot.wales

                          @joykill @neil
                          Apologies if this is way more than you were anticipating/wanted but...

                          sources: I am a UK based kinkster in the scene for 20 years who also runs community events & is actively involved in community safety.

                          Also a UK based lawyer who is also a kinkster and has writings on Fetlife about this along with the legal realities of being actively engaged in kink in the UK.
                          Sources from his writing:

                          1/

                          alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                          alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                          alexisbushnell@toot.wales
                          wrote last edited by
                          #78

                          @joykill @neil The Spanner Case & House of Lords judgement (yes 1987 & influenced by them being gay but it is precedent & now binding): https://www.bailii.org/uk/cases/UKHL/1993/19.html
                          R. v. Wilson 1996: https://www.lawteacher.net/cases/consent-wilson.php
                          R. v. Emmett 1999: https://www.bailii.org/ew/cases/EWCA/Crim/1999/1710.html

                          2/

                          alexisbushnell@toot.walesA 1 Reply Last reply
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                          • alexisbushnell@toot.walesA alexisbushnell@toot.wales

                            @joykill @neil The Spanner Case & House of Lords judgement (yes 1987 & influenced by them being gay but it is precedent & now binding): https://www.bailii.org/uk/cases/UKHL/1993/19.html
                            R. v. Wilson 1996: https://www.lawteacher.net/cases/consent-wilson.php
                            R. v. Emmett 1999: https://www.bailii.org/ew/cases/EWCA/Crim/1999/1710.html

                            2/

                            alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                            alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                            alexisbushnell@toot.wales
                            wrote last edited by
                            #79

                            @joykill @neil The Domestic Abuse Act 2021 "If you cause someone else serious harm, then it is not a defence that the person consented to it. Serious harm has the same meaning as for s.75A of the SCA (anything from actual bodily harm upwards, so bruises are in scope)."
                            https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2021/17/contents

                            Also many kink focused sex worker friends who have had to change what content they create to avoid

                            Also the government: https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/domestic-abuse-bill-2020-factsheets/consent-to-serious-harm-for-sexual-gratification-not-a-defence .

                            3/3

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • joykill@mastodon.socialJ joykill@mastodon.social

                              @neil @alexisbushnell

                              Given the very vibrant kink scene in London, I also am rather skeptical of this, but I would be interested to hear your experiences if you have any first or second-hand knowledge of people in the UK getting in trouble with the law for sharing or hosting consensual kink content online.

                              neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                              neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                              neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
                              wrote last edited by
                              #80

                              @joykill @alexisbushnell

                              > first or second-hand knowledge of people in the UK getting in trouble with the law for sharing or hosting consensual kink content online

                              Specifically online, I can think of case law around obscenity, and around images depicting illegal acts (in the sense of extreme pornography), but not about, say, a foot fetish.

                              neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN 1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                                @joykill @alexisbushnell

                                > first or second-hand knowledge of people in the UK getting in trouble with the law for sharing or hosting consensual kink content online

                                Specifically online, I can think of case law around obscenity, and around images depicting illegal acts (in the sense of extreme pornography), but not about, say, a foot fetish.

                                neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                                neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                                neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
                                wrote last edited by
                                #81

                                @joykill @alexisbushnell

                                It really does depend though, and there are things which consenting parties may undertake which, if they were distribute in photographic form, would amount to an offence.

                                But there are also many things which would fall under the umbrella of "kink" which are not prohibit (in terms of the action, or photography etc. depicting it). To the extent that constitutes pornography though - the definition of which in the OSA is opaque - there are additional obligations relating to hosting it.

                                neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                                  @joykill @alexisbushnell

                                  It really does depend though, and there are things which consenting parties may undertake which, if they were distribute in photographic form, would amount to an offence.

                                  But there are also many things which would fall under the umbrella of "kink" which are not prohibit (in terms of the action, or photography etc. depicting it). To the extent that constitutes pornography though - the definition of which in the OSA is opaque - there are additional obligations relating to hosting it.

                                  neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                                  neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                                  neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #82

                                  @joykill @alexisbushnell

                                  The law of consent, when it comes to (consensual, in the common sense of the term) sexual activity, is in dire need of reform.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                                    @alexisbushnell @joykill

                                    > most kink is illegal in the UK

                                    I am rather sceptical of this!

                                    Some, for sure, but I'd be surprised by "most"!

                                    jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                    jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                    jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.uk
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #83

                                    @neil
                                    Ah. This is the fallout of Operation Spanner and R. v Brown (no relation I assume) thing.

                                    IANAL but a lot of stuff is questionably not legal. Whether in 2026 the authorities would care about it up in the air but the Sexual Offences Act 2003 clouded it even more.

                                    @alexisbushnell @joykill

                                    neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN alexisbushnell@toot.walesA 2 Replies Last reply
                                    0
                                    • jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.uk

                                      @neil
                                      Ah. This is the fallout of Operation Spanner and R. v Brown (no relation I assume) thing.

                                      IANAL but a lot of stuff is questionably not legal. Whether in 2026 the authorities would care about it up in the air but the Sexual Offences Act 2003 clouded it even more.

                                      @alexisbushnell @joykill

                                      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                                      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                                      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #84

                                      @jamesb @alexisbushnell @joykill

                                      Kink covers a broad spectrum, and there are plenty of things where, IMHO, there is no genuine debate about legality.

                                      Similarly, there are things which could indeed be prosecuted, despite being "obviously" consensual.

                                      jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.ukJ jamesb@fedi.duckduckpigeon.co.uk

                                        @neil
                                        Ah. This is the fallout of Operation Spanner and R. v Brown (no relation I assume) thing.

                                        IANAL but a lot of stuff is questionably not legal. Whether in 2026 the authorities would care about it up in the air but the Sexual Offences Act 2003 clouded it even more.

                                        @alexisbushnell @joykill

                                        alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alexisbushnell@toot.walesA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alexisbushnell@toot.wales
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #85

                                        @jamesb @neil @joykill not a lawyer but given the social and political situation currently, I would not fancy my chances as a Queer kinkster in court.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • joykill@mastodon.socialJ joykill@mastodon.social

                                          @neil @alexisbushnell

                                          idk if being blocked by a server is such a big deal tbh. I would personally prefer to freely engage with the people I'm interested in, rather than hold off for fear that some unknown corner of the internet admined by puritans might not get to see my posts.

                                          crazy_pony@rubber.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                                          crazy_pony@rubber.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                                          crazy_pony@rubber.social
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #86

                                          @joykill
                                          it is, because so often it is not a sinle person that is blocked but the whole server they are on
                                          (might not happen to the people using mastodon.social that is too big to fail)

                                          If a server is blocked, this cuts you off from any interaction with your friends there, or if the block happened before you will never find your friends there to begin

                                          @neil @alexisbushnell

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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