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CIRCLE WITH A DOT

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  3. I woke up still pondering @girlonthenet's lamentation (I think; https://mastodon.social/@girlonthenet/116353766078817354), that while lots of people enjoy her sex blog, few people boost her toots about it.

I woke up still pondering @girlonthenet's lamentation (I think; https://mastodon.social/@girlonthenet/116353766078817354), that while lots of people enjoy her sex blog, few people boost her toots about it.

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  • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

    If you have got this far, perhaps you would welcome some suggestions for fedizens who I follow, who post sex-related stuff.

    @girlonthenet: the queen of text and audio smut, with multiple books under her belt too.

    @mindpersephone: short form text, often sci-fi and genderqueer.

    @JenJen: beautiful hand drawn smut, interspersed with rants about Linux.

    @alice: more lockpicking than smut, but smut is there, and especially #AltAfterDark.

    Newer to me:

    @Jaimieserotica: a relatively new blogger, with a mix of fiction and non-fiction (I think!)

    @GoingDownWithSundial: another relatively new smut blogger, also touching on neurodiversity

    (And, look, I apologise in advance for the people who I will inevitably omit by accident; it is not personal, I am simply fallible. I have not included people who post nudes because that doesn't necessarily mean "sexual".

    By all means add your own suggestions / your own blog / self-promotion.)

    nehalenia@dresden.networkN This user is from outside of this forum
    nehalenia@dresden.networkN This user is from outside of this forum
    nehalenia@dresden.network
    wrote last edited by
    #42

    @neil @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial I'd say if all these creators use the right hashtags in their toots, they will reach a wider audience even without many retoots. That is the beauty of the fediverse.

    neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • nehalenia@dresden.networkN nehalenia@dresden.network

      @neil @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial I'd say if all these creators use the right hashtags in their toots, they will reach a wider audience even without many retoots. That is the beauty of the fediverse.

      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
      wrote last edited by
      #43

      @Nehalenia @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial

      Hashtags can help, a bit (not much, in my experience, but more than zero), but I think that the concern here is about *human participation* and boosting, rather than simply about "reach" / readability.

      jaimieserotica@kinkycats.orgJ rubyjones@wandering.shopR 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

        @Nehalenia @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial

        Hashtags can help, a bit (not much, in my experience, but more than zero), but I think that the concern here is about *human participation* and boosting, rather than simply about "reach" / readability.

        jaimieserotica@kinkycats.orgJ This user is from outside of this forum
        jaimieserotica@kinkycats.orgJ This user is from outside of this forum
        jaimieserotica@kinkycats.org
        wrote last edited by
        #44

        @neil @Nehalenia @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @GoingDownWithSundial
        Very much this.

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

          I suspect that it comes down to a mix of:

          * stigma about sex as pleasure / being embarrassed about what others here might think

          * concerns relating to professional expectations and obligations

          * sex as being in the sphere of one's private life

          I can understand each of these, and why they might lead to a "like" rather than a "boost".

          None of them inhibit paying or tipping someone, as a thank you for their work though, which is another way of being supportive.

          rubyjones@wandering.shopR This user is from outside of this forum
          rubyjones@wandering.shopR This user is from outside of this forum
          rubyjones@wandering.shop
          wrote last edited by
          #45

          @neil There's also just a general culture where people feel oddly 'nervous' about interacting with content producers and don't seem to understand, no matter how many times you explicitly say it, that we really want positive feedback. That posting into a void that never responds is really depressing, even if you know some people are reading.

          Yet they don't feel self-conscious at all about making criticisms🤷‍♀️

          neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • rubyjones@wandering.shopR rubyjones@wandering.shop

            @neil There's also just a general culture where people feel oddly 'nervous' about interacting with content producers and don't seem to understand, no matter how many times you explicitly say it, that we really want positive feedback. That posting into a void that never responds is really depressing, even if you know some people are reading.

            Yet they don't feel self-conscious at all about making criticisms🤷‍♀️

            neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
            neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
            neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
            wrote last edited by
            #46

            @rubyjones Oh, goodness, yes, excellent point.

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

              @Nehalenia @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial

              Hashtags can help, a bit (not much, in my experience, but more than zero), but I think that the concern here is about *human participation* and boosting, rather than simply about "reach" / readability.

              rubyjones@wandering.shopR This user is from outside of this forum
              rubyjones@wandering.shopR This user is from outside of this forum
              rubyjones@wandering.shop
              wrote last edited by
              #47

              @neil @Nehalenia @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial Yeah, this very much misses the point. It's about people not expressing appreciation rather than the person producing the content failing to do the obvious things that would increase reach.

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • goingdownwithsundial@mastodon.socialG goingdownwithsundial@mastodon.social

                @neil
                @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica

                @innocentlb long-time blogger, gentle, introspective smut

                innocentlb@mastodon.socialI This user is from outside of this forum
                innocentlb@mastodon.socialI This user is from outside of this forum
                innocentlb@mastodon.social
                wrote last edited by
                #48

                @GoingDownWithSundial @neil @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica

                @robyneatseverything - formerly prolific sex blogger, still a wealth of content out there

                @carolynaluna - mesophile, moongirl, soft and sensuous

                @carasutra - still putting stuff out there

                @Septimus - former Herald of Dongs, also got me into Bluesky early

                neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • mindpersephone@spookygirl.booM mindpersephone@spookygirl.boo

                  @neil @girlonthenet @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial thank you Neil! 😘

                  And welcome to the new folk following. Don't worry, I won't be offended if you see a few of my posts and decide I'm not for you and unfollow. I'm not everyones cup of tea.

                  girlonthenet@mastodon.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                  girlonthenet@mastodon.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                  girlonthenet@mastodon.social
                  wrote last edited by
                  #49

                  @mindpersephone but you are an excellent, spicy cup of tea 😃 x

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • innocentlb@mastodon.socialI innocentlb@mastodon.social

                    @GoingDownWithSundial @neil @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica

                    @robyneatseverything - formerly prolific sex blogger, still a wealth of content out there

                    @carolynaluna - mesophile, moongirl, soft and sensuous

                    @carasutra - still putting stuff out there

                    @Septimus - former Herald of Dongs, also got me into Bluesky early

                    neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                    neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                    neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
                    wrote last edited by
                    #50

                    @innocentlb @GoingDownWithSundial @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @robyneatseverything @carolynaluna @carasutra @Septimus

                    I knew that I'd forget people 😞

                    girlonthenet@mastodon.socialG goingdownwithsundial@mastodon.socialG 2 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                      @innocentlb @GoingDownWithSundial @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @robyneatseverything @carolynaluna @carasutra @Septimus

                      I knew that I'd forget people 😞

                      girlonthenet@mastodon.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                      girlonthenet@mastodon.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                      girlonthenet@mastodon.social
                      wrote last edited by
                      #51

                      @neil always the way with recommendations - thank you for doing them anyway!

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                        @innocentlb @GoingDownWithSundial @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @robyneatseverything @carolynaluna @carasutra @Septimus

                        I knew that I'd forget people 😞

                        goingdownwithsundial@mastodon.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                        goingdownwithsundial@mastodon.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                        goingdownwithsundial@mastodon.social
                        wrote last edited by
                        #52

                        @neil it's just good of you to open this up in the first place!

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                          Hmm... I wonder (I told you that I was pondering!) if there is an added factor here, of the fedi demographic: of older people, perhaps especially men (don't laugh), being self-aware of engaging with younger adults posting sex-related stuff, and coming across as creepy. Perhaps?

                          theplaguedoc@glitterkitten.co.ukT This user is from outside of this forum
                          theplaguedoc@glitterkitten.co.ukT This user is from outside of this forum
                          theplaguedoc@glitterkitten.co.uk
                          wrote last edited by
                          #53

                          @neil I think this is a big part of it for me. I follow some of the people you've tagged, and I've purchased (non-NSFW) artwork from at least one of them, but I would be very wary of highlighting NSFW material from anyone, especially younger than me, in case it was misconstrued.

                          There is also a part of me that thinks, even though none of my patients are likely to find me here, what they might think if they saw their doctor boosting that sort of material.

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                            If you have got this far, perhaps you would welcome some suggestions for fedizens who I follow, who post sex-related stuff.

                            @girlonthenet: the queen of text and audio smut, with multiple books under her belt too.

                            @mindpersephone: short form text, often sci-fi and genderqueer.

                            @JenJen: beautiful hand drawn smut, interspersed with rants about Linux.

                            @alice: more lockpicking than smut, but smut is there, and especially #AltAfterDark.

                            Newer to me:

                            @Jaimieserotica: a relatively new blogger, with a mix of fiction and non-fiction (I think!)

                            @GoingDownWithSundial: another relatively new smut blogger, also touching on neurodiversity

                            (And, look, I apologise in advance for the people who I will inevitably omit by accident; it is not personal, I am simply fallible. I have not included people who post nudes because that doesn't necessarily mean "sexual".

                            By all means add your own suggestions / your own blog / self-promotion.)

                            slash909uk@mastodon.me.ukS This user is from outside of this forum
                            slash909uk@mastodon.me.ukS This user is from outside of this forum
                            slash909uk@mastodon.me.uk
                            wrote last edited by
                            #54

                            @neil @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @alice @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial for me it's risk of a negative response from parents. I am a Scout leader and have been PTA chair of my local primary. I wish to continue to contribute to my community and not get 'cancelled' by those with different opinions about sex and life!

                            I guess I need an alt account🤷‍♂️

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                              Hmm... I wonder (I told you that I was pondering!) if there is an added factor here, of the fedi demographic: of older people, perhaps especially men (don't laugh), being self-aware of engaging with younger adults posting sex-related stuff, and coming across as creepy. Perhaps?

                              szescstopni@circumstances.runS This user is from outside of this forum
                              szescstopni@circumstances.runS This user is from outside of this forum
                              szescstopni@circumstances.run
                              wrote last edited by
                              #55

                              @neil Fear of appearing creepy is an important factor in my interactions. Old white guy, I probably shouldn't be here, so I stay shut. It's a bit similar in real-life interactions with young people. I worry that talking about sex – the fascinating, the ugly aspects of it – will be misunderstood as an attempt to hit on someone. One of the ways out I see is to talk about biology. Ducks. Frogs. Bees. Not creepy at all 🙂

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                                I woke up still pondering @girlonthenet's lamentation (I think; https://mastodon.social/@girlonthenet/116353766078817354), that while lots of people enjoy her sex blog, few people boost her toots about it.

                                I follow and chat with quite a lot of sex positive / sex-related people here, and many have expressed similar sentiments. It must be demoralising.

                                I don't have good ideas here, but it would be such a shame to lose this wonderful diverse friendly bunch of creative people.

                                rail@snailedit.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
                                rail@snailedit.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
                                rail@snailedit.social
                                wrote last edited by
                                #56

                                @neil It prob has a lot to do with folks who have a separate After Dark account on the Fedis like I do, and because the line between those can be pretty solid separation between those parts of the Fedi for the most part

                                Mostly in the sense that the lewd content is not the intended consumption of the SFW side of someone given it's a more sensitive topic that isn't more common palance of today

                                The sense that even if content warned, isn't something seen as a positive for the known audience of someone's SFW place where this is not the case on someone's AD where everyone generally has engaged with the permission structure to be intentionally and massively horny (but still provide those CWs) with each other as part of a community

                                Allowing for both casual and paid sex work to intermingle in a sex positive space, all while under being under Fediverse instances which openly allow lewd and sexual content which other instances may strongly restrict, forcing it to move to that other instance

                                rail@snailedit.socialR 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • rail@snailedit.socialR rail@snailedit.social

                                  @neil It prob has a lot to do with folks who have a separate After Dark account on the Fedis like I do, and because the line between those can be pretty solid separation between those parts of the Fedi for the most part

                                  Mostly in the sense that the lewd content is not the intended consumption of the SFW side of someone given it's a more sensitive topic that isn't more common palance of today

                                  The sense that even if content warned, isn't something seen as a positive for the known audience of someone's SFW place where this is not the case on someone's AD where everyone generally has engaged with the permission structure to be intentionally and massively horny (but still provide those CWs) with each other as part of a community

                                  Allowing for both casual and paid sex work to intermingle in a sex positive space, all while under being under Fediverse instances which openly allow lewd and sexual content which other instances may strongly restrict, forcing it to move to that other instance

                                  rail@snailedit.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
                                  rail@snailedit.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
                                  rail@snailedit.social
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #57

                                  @neil But also that separation allows you to opt out of that content easily when viewing that content is not at an ideal moment, having a feed where you don't need to scroll back down to see your mutual's latest artsy nude is actually really powerful as a thing (even if yes lists exist), it's a permission and perception thing.

                                  As well as the anxiety of what other people incl. new people think about it as it comes across their feeds or searching through your profile before following

                                  As much as I could post a visually beautiful dick pic with CWs on a Fedi server that allows it, the implication of that on the people who already follow me or could follow me, pushes it away into that other account where the permission structure allows me to engage with that way and other people can respond positively to that

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                                    Hmm... I wonder (I told you that I was pondering!) if there is an added factor here, of the fedi demographic: of older people, perhaps especially men (don't laugh), being self-aware of engaging with younger adults posting sex-related stuff, and coming across as creepy. Perhaps?

                                    niloc@todon.nlN This user is from outside of this forum
                                    niloc@todon.nlN This user is from outside of this forum
                                    niloc@todon.nl
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #58

                                    @neil Definitely a factor imho.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                                      If you have got this far, perhaps you would welcome some suggestions for fedizens who I follow, who post sex-related stuff.

                                      @girlonthenet: the queen of text and audio smut, with multiple books under her belt too.

                                      @mindpersephone: short form text, often sci-fi and genderqueer.

                                      @JenJen: beautiful hand drawn smut, interspersed with rants about Linux.

                                      @alice: more lockpicking than smut, but smut is there, and especially #AltAfterDark.

                                      Newer to me:

                                      @Jaimieserotica: a relatively new blogger, with a mix of fiction and non-fiction (I think!)

                                      @GoingDownWithSundial: another relatively new smut blogger, also touching on neurodiversity

                                      (And, look, I apologise in advance for the people who I will inevitably omit by accident; it is not personal, I am simply fallible. I have not included people who post nudes because that doesn't necessarily mean "sexual".

                                      By all means add your own suggestions / your own blog / self-promotion.)

                                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                      alice@lgbtqia.space
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #59

                                      @neil all good recommendations, but the hashtag is #AltAfterDark (like the account @AltAfterDark) 🩷

                                      @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial

                                      neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN 1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                        @neil all good recommendations, but the hashtag is #AltAfterDark (like the account @AltAfterDark) 🩷

                                        @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial

                                        neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                                        neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN This user is from outside of this forum
                                        neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #60

                                        @alice @AltAfterDark @girlonthenet @mindpersephone @JenJen @Jaimieserotica @GoingDownWithSundial

                                        mea culpa. Fixed!

                                        1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

                                          I woke up still pondering @girlonthenet's lamentation (I think; https://mastodon.social/@girlonthenet/116353766078817354), that while lots of people enjoy her sex blog, few people boost her toots about it.

                                          I follow and chat with quite a lot of sex positive / sex-related people here, and many have expressed similar sentiments. It must be demoralising.

                                          I don't have good ideas here, but it would be such a shame to lose this wonderful diverse friendly bunch of creative people.

                                          ? Offline
                                          ? Offline
                                          Guest
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #61

                                          @neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk @girlonthenet@mastodon.social in my case, the reason is a little different - I enjoy the life-posting, commentary, and other sex-positivity content, but I don't care for audio porn so I just ignore all those posts.

                                          neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.ukN 1 Reply Last reply
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