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  3. The age verifier knows how old you are at all times.

The age verifier knows how old you are at all times.

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  • crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC crackhappy@cyberpunk.lol

    @lritter @ryanc It's a modification of an old copy pasta about missiles.

    lritter@mastodon.gamedev.placeL This user is from outside of this forum
    lritter@mastodon.gamedev.placeL This user is from outside of this forum
    lritter@mastodon.gamedev.place
    wrote last edited by
    #4

    @crackhappy @ryanc too late i'm dead

    F 1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • R relay@relay.an.exchange shared this topic
    • lritter@mastodon.gamedev.placeL lritter@mastodon.gamedev.place

      @crackhappy @ryanc too late i'm dead

      F This user is from outside of this forum
      F This user is from outside of this forum
      froztbyte@mastodon.social
      wrote last edited by
      #5

      @lritter @crackhappy @ryanc soon: zalgo comes?

      crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC edbruce@infosec.exchangeE 2 Replies Last reply
      0
      • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

        The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

        The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

        In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

        The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

        It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

        bamfic@autonomous.zoneB This user is from outside of this forum
        bamfic@autonomous.zoneB This user is from outside of this forum
        bamfic@autonomous.zone
        wrote last edited by
        #6

        @ryanc this reminds me of https://confer.to/blog/2026/01/private-inference/

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • R relay@relay.publicsquare.global shared this topic
        • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

          The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

          The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

          In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

          The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

          It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

          hardly@beige.partyH This user is from outside of this forum
          hardly@beige.partyH This user is from outside of this forum
          hardly@beige.party
          wrote last edited by
          #7

          @ryanc

          Now explain gender, because they’re guessing that too.

          #discord

          hardly@beige.partyH 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • hardly@beige.partyH hardly@beige.party

            @ryanc

            Now explain gender, because they’re guessing that too.

            #discord

            hardly@beige.partyH This user is from outside of this forum
            hardly@beige.partyH This user is from outside of this forum
            hardly@beige.party
            wrote last edited by
            #8

            @ryanc

            #discord

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            • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

              The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

              The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

              In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

              The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

              It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

              greatlaketrout@noc.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
              greatlaketrout@noc.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
              greatlaketrout@noc.social
              wrote last edited by
              #9

              @ryanc

              I am older and wiser for reading this 😑

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • F froztbyte@mastodon.social

                @lritter @crackhappy @ryanc soon: zalgo comes?

                crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC This user is from outside of this forum
                crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC This user is from outside of this forum
                crackhappy@cyberpunk.lol
                wrote last edited by
                #10

                @froztbyte Despite being on the Internet way before the SA Goons came on the scene, I had never heard of Zalgo before. I just did some light research and that sounds like fun. You should adjust it to match and post it.

                F 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC crackhappy@cyberpunk.lol

                  @froztbyte Despite being on the Internet way before the SA Goons came on the scene, I had never heard of Zalgo before. I just did some light research and that sounds like fun. You should adjust it to match and post it.

                  F This user is from outside of this forum
                  F This user is from outside of this forum
                  froztbyte@mastodon.social
                  wrote last edited by
                  #11

                  @crackhappy congratulations on being in today's lucky 10k!

                  crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

                    The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

                    The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

                    In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

                    The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

                    It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

                    argonaut@bonn.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                    argonaut@bonn.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                    argonaut@bonn.social
                    wrote last edited by
                    #12

                    @ryanc This sounds like satire, but ist most probably how it actually works. Now I'm even more depressed.

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • F froztbyte@mastodon.social

                      @crackhappy congratulations on being in today's lucky 10k!

                      crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC This user is from outside of this forum
                      crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC This user is from outside of this forum
                      crackhappy@cyberpunk.lol
                      wrote last edited by
                      #13

                      @froztbyte I always celebrate learning something new. It's a thirst deep inside me, similar to my thirst for your blood.

                      crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC crackhappy@cyberpunk.lol

                        @froztbyte I always celebrate learning something new. It's a thirst deep inside me, similar to my thirst for your blood.

                        crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC This user is from outside of this forum
                        crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC This user is from outside of this forum
                        crackhappy@cyberpunk.lol
                        wrote last edited by
                        #14

                        @froztbyte Let me reiterate, I am not a vampire. That you know of.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

                          The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

                          The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

                          In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

                          The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

                          It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

                          kats@chaosfem.twK This user is from outside of this forum
                          kats@chaosfem.twK This user is from outside of this forum
                          kats@chaosfem.tw
                          wrote last edited by
                          #15

                          @ryanc Thankyou for reminding me that I haven't made a "missile knows where it is Monday" in far too long.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

                            The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

                            The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

                            In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

                            The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

                            It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

                            katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
                            katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
                            katzenberger@tldr.nettime.org
                            wrote last edited by
                            #16

                            @ryanc

                            I have visibly aged from reading this.

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

                              The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

                              The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

                              In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

                              The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

                              It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

                              tilai@mastodon.socialT This user is from outside of this forum
                              tilai@mastodon.socialT This user is from outside of this forum
                              tilai@mastodon.social
                              wrote last edited by
                              #17

                              @ryanc Why does it read so well? And why don't I understand it anyway? mind-boggling

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                              0
                              • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

                                The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

                                The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

                                In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

                                The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

                                It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

                                eirias@mefi.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
                                eirias@mefi.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
                                eirias@mefi.social
                                wrote last edited by
                                #18

                                @ryanc truly beautiful engineering

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • F froztbyte@mastodon.social

                                  @lritter @crackhappy @ryanc soon: zalgo comes?

                                  edbruce@infosec.exchangeE This user is from outside of this forum
                                  edbruce@infosec.exchangeE This user is from outside of this forum
                                  edbruce@infosec.exchange
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #19

                                  @froztbyte Z̴̛͈̀̽̊̓͛̓̿̋̾̃̉͑̒͠à̸̡̩̦̝̺̻͚̥̭͇̦̩͎͚͇̈́͂͠͝l̸̖͎̝͍̱̱̼̮͔͕̍̂̉͒̓̌͐͂͂̄̀̕͜͠g̶̨̲̼̎̌͂̀̈́̉͑̈́̅̅̆́̂ǫ̴̡͈̫̼̻͚͐̒̓̀̿͋̀̿ ̷̡̣̯̖̪̗̥́̒͘c̴̢̡̦̯͉͙̩̩̟̬͛̇̌͗̑͐̈́͐͋̾̿̀̕͜͠o̵̡̡͎̽͆̐͋̏̈̓̈́͘m̶̛̰̝̦̪͉̳̰̣̙̝̝̖̲͑̚̚͠ͅe̴̛̙̮̟͓̜̬͌͆̓͌͗͗̂̃͐̓̐̒͂͗s̵̛̖͖̥̜̦̑̓̏͑̈̊̓̓̈́̅͗͛͌͘͠͠

                                  @lritter @crackhappy @ryanc

                                  crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC 1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • edbruce@infosec.exchangeE edbruce@infosec.exchange

                                    @froztbyte Z̴̛͈̀̽̊̓͛̓̿̋̾̃̉͑̒͠à̸̡̩̦̝̺̻͚̥̭͇̦̩͎͚͇̈́͂͠͝l̸̖͎̝͍̱̱̼̮͔͕̍̂̉͒̓̌͐͂͂̄̀̕͜͠g̶̨̲̼̎̌͂̀̈́̉͑̈́̅̅̆́̂ǫ̴̡͈̫̼̻͚͐̒̓̀̿͋̀̿ ̷̡̣̯̖̪̗̥́̒͘c̴̢̡̦̯͉͙̩̩̟̬͛̇̌͗̑͐̈́͐͋̾̿̀̕͜͠o̵̡̡͎̽͆̐͋̏̈̓̈́͘m̶̛̰̝̦̪͉̳̰̣̙̝̝̖̲͑̚̚͠ͅe̴̛̙̮̟͓̜̬͌͆̓͌͗͗̂̃͐̓̐̒͂͗s̵̛̖͖̥̜̦̑̓̏͑̈̊̓̓̈́̅͗͛͌͘͠͠

                                    @lritter @crackhappy @ryanc

                                    crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC This user is from outside of this forum
                                    crackhappy@cyberpunk.lolC This user is from outside of this forum
                                    crackhappy@cyberpunk.lol
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #20

                                    @EdBruce @froztbyte @lritter @ryanc UTF abuse!

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

                                      The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

                                      The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

                                      In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

                                      The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

                                      It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

                                      despens@digipres.clubD This user is from outside of this forum
                                      despens@digipres.clubD This user is from outside of this forum
                                      despens@digipres.club
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #21

                                      @ryanc …finally somebody put this whole process into simple terms a layperson can understand!

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

                                        The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

                                        The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

                                        In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

                                        The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

                                        It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

                                        ryanc@infosec.exchangeR This user is from outside of this forum
                                        ryanc@infosec.exchangeR This user is from outside of this forum
                                        ryanc@infosec.exchange
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #22

                                        If this is not circulating internally at Discord by now I am disappoint.

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                                        • ryanc@infosec.exchangeR ryanc@infosec.exchange

                                          The age verifier knows how old you are at all times. It knows this because it knows how old you aren't. By subtracting how old you are from how old you aren't, or how old you aren't from how old you are (whichever is greater), it obtains a difference, or remainder.

                                          The verification system uses deviations to generate corrective dark patterns to drive you from a date of birth that isn't yours to a date of birth that is, and arriving at an age where you weren't, but now are. Consequently, the age you are is now the age that you weren't, and it follows that the age that you were is now the age that you aren't.

                                          In the event that the age that you are is not the age that you weren't, the system has acquired a validation error. The validation error is the difference between the age the verifier thinks you are, and the age you weren't. If the validation error is considered to be a significant factor, it too may be corrected by by the upload of a high-resolution JPEG. However, the verifier must also know how old you were.

                                          The age verification scenario works as follows: Because a variation has modified some of the information the you have input, it is not sure just how old you are. However, it is sure how old you aren't, within reason, and it knows how old you were.

                                          It now subtracts the age you should be from the age you weren't, or vice-versa, and by differentiating this from the algebraic sum of the year you shouldn't be and the year you were, it is able to obtain the deviation and its variation, which is called January 1st, 1970.

                                          alessandro@mstdn.caA This user is from outside of this forum
                                          alessandro@mstdn.caA This user is from outside of this forum
                                          alessandro@mstdn.ca
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #23

                                          @ryanc needs more DoD PowerPoint

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