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  3. The year is 1992

The year is 1992

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  • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    uep@timeloop.cafeU This user is from outside of this forum
    uep@timeloop.cafeU This user is from outside of this forum
    uep@timeloop.cafe
    wrote last edited by
    #3

    @monkeyninja for us heathens, "Constant gravy" also could work

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

      The year is 1992.
      I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
      I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
      Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
      I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
      “Hello?”
      “Honey, it’s me.”
      “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
      “I need you to translate something for me.”
      “Right now?”
      “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
      “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
      “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

      The phone is put near the radio

      “Could you hear it honey?”
      “…Yes?”
      “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
      “…I’m sorry, what now?”
      “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

      I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

      “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
      “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

      I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

      rinkside@mastodon.onlineR This user is from outside of this forum
      rinkside@mastodon.onlineR This user is from outside of this forum
      rinkside@mastodon.online
      wrote last edited by
      #4

      @monkeyninja This is one of the best misheard lyrics I’ve ever come across! 😂

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

        The year is 1992.
        I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
        I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
        Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
        I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
        “Hello?”
        “Honey, it’s me.”
        “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
        “I need you to translate something for me.”
        “Right now?”
        “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
        “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
        “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

        The phone is put near the radio

        “Could you hear it honey?”
        “…Yes?”
        “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
        “…I’m sorry, what now?”
        “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

        I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

        “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
        “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

        I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

        tankgrrl@hachyderm.ioT This user is from outside of this forum
        tankgrrl@hachyderm.ioT This user is from outside of this forum
        tankgrrl@hachyderm.io
        wrote last edited by
        #5

        @monkeyninja Imagining it morphing over time and your mom making gravy and singing "Constant Gravy?"

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

          The year is 1992.
          I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
          I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
          Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
          I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
          “Hello?”
          “Honey, it’s me.”
          “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
          “I need you to translate something for me.”
          “Right now?”
          “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
          “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
          “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

          The phone is put near the radio

          “Could you hear it honey?”
          “…Yes?”
          “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
          “…I’m sorry, what now?”
          “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

          I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

          “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
          “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

          I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

          imalcolm@mastodon.socialI This user is from outside of this forum
          imalcolm@mastodon.socialI This user is from outside of this forum
          imalcolm@mastodon.social
          wrote last edited by
          #6

          @monkeyninja

          Great, now I'm constantly craving gravy...

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

            The year is 1992.
            I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
            I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
            Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
            I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
            “Hello?”
            “Honey, it’s me.”
            “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
            “I need you to translate something for me.”
            “Right now?”
            “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
            “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
            “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

            The phone is put near the radio

            “Could you hear it honey?”
            “…Yes?”
            “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
            “…I’m sorry, what now?”
            “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

            I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

            “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
            “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

            I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

            pomcountyirregs@mstdn.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
            pomcountyirregs@mstdn.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
            pomcountyirregs@mstdn.social
            wrote last edited by
            #7

            @monkeyninja I’ve had worse ideas for a song than “God bless gravy.”

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

              The year is 1992.
              I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
              I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
              Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
              I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
              “Hello?”
              “Honey, it’s me.”
              “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
              “I need you to translate something for me.”
              “Right now?”
              “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
              “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
              “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

              The phone is put near the radio

              “Could you hear it honey?”
              “…Yes?”
              “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
              “…I’m sorry, what now?”
              “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

              I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

              “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
              “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

              I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

              cowboywho@libranigans.comC This user is from outside of this forum
              cowboywho@libranigans.comC This user is from outside of this forum
              cowboywho@libranigans.com
              wrote last edited by
              #8

              @monkeyninja There is an actual gravy song ... https://youtu.be/MsRY9vqr9rA

              teeceegee@toot.communityT 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                The year is 1992.
                I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                “Hello?”
                “Honey, it’s me.”
                “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                “I need you to translate something for me.”
                “Right now?”
                “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                The phone is put near the radio

                “Could you hear it honey?”
                “…Yes?”
                “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                rowlandm@disabled.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
                rowlandm@disabled.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
                rowlandm@disabled.social
                wrote last edited by
                #9

                @monkeyninja Song from Paul Kelly - How to Make Gravy

                - YouTube

                Auf YouTube findest du die angesagtesten Videos und Tracks. Außerdem kannst du eigene Inhalte hochladen und mit Freunden oder gleich der ganzen Welt teilen.

                favicon

                (www.youtube.com)

                #Australia

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • cowboywho@libranigans.comC cowboywho@libranigans.com

                  @monkeyninja There is an actual gravy song ... https://youtu.be/MsRY9vqr9rA

                  teeceegee@toot.communityT This user is from outside of this forum
                  teeceegee@toot.communityT This user is from outside of this forum
                  teeceegee@toot.community
                  wrote last edited by
                  #10

                  @CowboyWho @monkeyninja In Australia, we have a whole Gravy Day (21st December) thanks to this song 😄
                  https://youtu.be/noDE38viJN0?si=5uhiFx8mnYDiK-9w

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                    The year is 1992.
                    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                    “Hello?”
                    “Honey, it’s me.”
                    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                    “I need you to translate something for me.”
                    “Right now?”
                    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                    The phone is put near the radio

                    “Could you hear it honey?”
                    “…Yes?”
                    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                    andrewhenry@mastodon.energyA This user is from outside of this forum
                    andrewhenry@mastodon.energyA This user is from outside of this forum
                    andrewhenry@mastodon.energy
                    wrote last edited by
                    #11

                    The Tragically Hip

                    🎵

                    “Porridge, it couldn’t come at a worse time.”

                    https://youtu.be/FhpezwGtDEg?t=104&si=YGM-4igdngg2kTFM

                    @monkeyninja

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                      The year is 1992.
                      I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                      I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                      Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                      I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                      “Hello?”
                      “Honey, it’s me.”
                      “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                      “I need you to translate something for me.”
                      “Right now?”
                      “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                      “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                      “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                      The phone is put near the radio

                      “Could you hear it honey?”
                      “…Yes?”
                      “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                      “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                      “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                      I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                      “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                      “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                      I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                      archivescribe@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                      archivescribe@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                      archivescribe@mastodon.social
                      wrote last edited by
                      #12

                      @monkeyninja I hope someday K.D. Lang hears this story. Your mom is a hoot!

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                        The year is 1992.
                        I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                        I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                        Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                        I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                        “Hello?”
                        “Honey, it’s me.”
                        “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                        “I need you to translate something for me.”
                        “Right now?”
                        “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                        “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                        “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                        The phone is put near the radio

                        “Could you hear it honey?”
                        “…Yes?”
                        “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                        “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                        “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                        I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                        “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                        “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                        I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                        sgsax@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                        sgsax@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                        sgsax@mastodon.social
                        wrote last edited by
                        #13

                        @monkeyninja This is the most wholesome story I've heard all day.

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                          The year is 1992.
                          I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                          I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                          Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                          I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                          “Hello?”
                          “Honey, it’s me.”
                          “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                          “I need you to translate something for me.”
                          “Right now?”
                          “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                          “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                          “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                          The phone is put near the radio

                          “Could you hear it honey?”
                          “…Yes?”
                          “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                          “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                          “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                          I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                          “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                          “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                          I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                          llanero24@social.mollejuo.comL This user is from outside of this forum
                          llanero24@social.mollejuo.comL This user is from outside of this forum
                          llanero24@social.mollejuo.com
                          wrote last edited by
                          #14

                          @monkeyninja In Spanish there's a whole sub-genre on how English songs "sounds" to a native -Spanish- speaker. For example, "We're not going to take it", if you say "huevos con aceite" sounds equal 🙃 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNoxyL0C4jI

                          nuclearoatmeal@beige.partyN 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                            The year is 1992.
                            I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                            I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                            Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                            I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                            “Hello?”
                            “Honey, it’s me.”
                            “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                            “I need you to translate something for me.”
                            “Right now?”
                            “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                            “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                            “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                            The phone is put near the radio

                            “Could you hear it honey?”
                            “…Yes?”
                            “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                            “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                            “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                            I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                            “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                            “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                            I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                            littlebobbytables@mstdn.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                            littlebobbytables@mstdn.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                            littlebobbytables@mstdn.social
                            wrote last edited by
                            #15

                            @monkeyninja

                            Every Thanksgiving I make stuffing waffles, and I GodBlessGravy.

                            littlebobbytables@mstdn.socialL 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                              The year is 1992.
                              I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                              I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                              Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                              I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                              “Hello?”
                              “Honey, it’s me.”
                              “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                              “I need you to translate something for me.”
                              “Right now?”
                              “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                              “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                              “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                              The phone is put near the radio

                              “Could you hear it honey?”
                              “…Yes?”
                              “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                              “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                              “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                              I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                              “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                              “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                              I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                              jessetmccann@mas.toJ This user is from outside of this forum
                              jessetmccann@mas.toJ This user is from outside of this forum
                              jessetmccann@mas.to
                              wrote last edited by
                              #16

                              @monkeyninja fifteen minutes in waldenbooks 1992 please.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                                The year is 1992.
                                I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                                I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                                Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                                I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                                “Hello?”
                                “Honey, it’s me.”
                                “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                                “I need you to translate something for me.”
                                “Right now?”
                                “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                                “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                                “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                                The phone is put near the radio

                                “Could you hear it honey?”
                                “…Yes?”
                                “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                                “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                                “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                                I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                                “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                                “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                                I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                                isol@mastodon.auI This user is from outside of this forum
                                isol@mastodon.auI This user is from outside of this forum
                                isol@mastodon.au
                                wrote last edited by
                                #17

                                @monkeyninja

                                What's the next line - "hallway beans"?
                                Do they go with the gravy?

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                                  The year is 1992.
                                  I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                                  I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                                  Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                                  I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                                  “Hello?”
                                  “Honey, it’s me.”
                                  “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                                  “I need you to translate something for me.”
                                  “Right now?”
                                  “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                                  “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                                  “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                                  The phone is put near the radio

                                  “Could you hear it honey?”
                                  “…Yes?”
                                  “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                                  “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                                  “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                                  I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                                  “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                                  “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                                  I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                                  wesdym@mastodon.socialW This user is from outside of this forum
                                  wesdym@mastodon.socialW This user is from outside of this forum
                                  wesdym@mastodon.social
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #18

                                  @monkeyninja At the time that Grisham was really hot, so were some cheeky, oblique self-help books. (Much less direct than later pop-sci; they were 'fun'.) I had a vivid dream that Grisham put one out, and I wandered into a Waldenbooks where it had its own display. The publisher hired people who looked like lawyers to stand around it. The book was titled, "Take Time to Smell the Pepper Grinders". I wish to FSM I was making that up. It's not even clever. It doesn't even make any sense.

                                  monkeyninja@10base2.devM 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                                    The year is 1992.
                                    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                                    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                                    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                                    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                                    “Hello?”
                                    “Honey, it’s me.”
                                    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                                    “I need you to translate something for me.”
                                    “Right now?”
                                    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                                    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                                    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                                    The phone is put near the radio

                                    “Could you hear it honey?”
                                    “…Yes?”
                                    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                                    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                                    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                                    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                                    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                                    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                                    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                                    beckermatic@pleroma.arielbecker.comB This user is from outside of this forum
                                    beckermatic@pleroma.arielbecker.comB This user is from outside of this forum
                                    beckermatic@pleroma.arielbecker.com
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #19
                                    @monkeyninja best mondegreen ever.
                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • monkeyninja@10base2.devM monkeyninja@10base2.dev

                                      The year is 1992.
                                      I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
                                      I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
                                      Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
                                      I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
                                      “Hello?”
                                      “Honey, it’s me.”
                                      “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
                                      “I need you to translate something for me.”
                                      “Right now?”
                                      “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
                                      “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
                                      “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

                                      The phone is put near the radio

                                      “Could you hear it honey?”
                                      “…Yes?”
                                      “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
                                      “…I’m sorry, what now?”
                                      “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

                                      I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

                                      “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
                                      “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

                                      I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

                                      catmisgivings@stranger.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                                      catmisgivings@stranger.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                                      catmisgivings@stranger.social
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #20

                                      @monkeyninja is anyone here in these replies NOT singing "God Bless Gravy" right now?

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • llanero24@social.mollejuo.comL llanero24@social.mollejuo.com

                                        @monkeyninja In Spanish there's a whole sub-genre on how English songs "sounds" to a native -Spanish- speaker. For example, "We're not going to take it", if you say "huevos con aceite" sounds equal 🙃 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNoxyL0C4jI

                                        nuclearoatmeal@beige.partyN This user is from outside of this forum
                                        nuclearoatmeal@beige.partyN This user is from outside of this forum
                                        nuclearoatmeal@beige.party
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #21

                                        @llanero24 @monkeyninja

                                        Ken Leeeeeeeeeeee!

                                        - YouTube

                                        Auf YouTube findest du die angesagtesten Videos und Tracks. Außerdem kannst du eigene Inhalte hochladen und mit Freunden oder gleich der ganzen Welt teilen.

                                        favicon

                                        (www.youtube.com)

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • littlebobbytables@mstdn.socialL littlebobbytables@mstdn.social

                                          @monkeyninja

                                          Every Thanksgiving I make stuffing waffles, and I GodBlessGravy.

                                          littlebobbytables@mstdn.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                                          littlebobbytables@mstdn.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                                          littlebobbytables@mstdn.social
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #22

                                          @monkeyninja

                                          You all thought I was posing.

                                          Stuffing.

                                          Waffles.

                                          Link Preview Image
                                          monkeyninja@10base2.devM 1 Reply Last reply
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