Hold on.
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how does one get in on that gig? asking for a friend...
@futurebird Not so long ago heads of FEMA were the experts in Houses of Waffle. Now, though…
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RE: https://flipboard.com/@newyorktimes/u.s.-6tjik97dz/-/a-VFo4INq0Rha0KLYBXX6HbA%3Aa%3A3195393-%2F0
Hold on. Did they talk to teleportation experts? What kind of expert do you get for this one?
I am also dubious. Everyone is dubious.
I guess object permanence isn't a FEMA job qualification?
@futurebird this guy

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@futurebird Not so long ago heads of FEMA were the experts in Houses of Waffle. Now, though…
@troublewithwords @futurebird Okay but to be fair the ability to teleport instantly to a Waffle House in an area affected by a natural disaster should reduce FEMA response times significantly.
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RE: https://flipboard.com/@newyorktimes/u.s.-6tjik97dz/-/a-VFo4INq0Rha0KLYBXX6HbA%3Aa%3A3195393-%2F0
Hold on. Did they talk to teleportation experts? What kind of expert do you get for this one?
I am also dubious. Everyone is dubious.
I guess object permanence isn't a FEMA job qualification?
@futurebird I feel like someone has made an SCP like this at some point
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RE: https://flipboard.com/@newyorktimes/u.s.-6tjik97dz/-/a-VFo4INq0Rha0KLYBXX6HbA%3Aa%3A3195393-%2F0
Hold on. Did they talk to teleportation experts? What kind of expert do you get for this one?
I am also dubious. Everyone is dubious.
I guess object permanence isn't a FEMA job qualification?
@futurebird Strange that God would teleport him to a restaurant rather than, say, teleport emergency supplies to people who need them.
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RE: https://flipboard.com/@newyorktimes/u.s.-6tjik97dz/-/a-VFo4INq0Rha0KLYBXX6HbA%3Aa%3A3195393-%2F0
Hold on. Did they talk to teleportation experts? What kind of expert do you get for this one?
I am also dubious. Everyone is dubious.
I guess object permanence isn't a FEMA job qualification?
@futurebird this guy has a teleporter, and he used it to go to waffle house, rather than the starship Enterprise? What the fuck, buddy, really?
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RE: https://flipboard.com/@newyorktimes/u.s.-6tjik97dz/-/a-VFo4INq0Rha0KLYBXX6HbA%3Aa%3A3195393-%2F0
Hold on. Did they talk to teleportation experts? What kind of expert do you get for this one?
I am also dubious. Everyone is dubious.
I guess object permanence isn't a FEMA job qualification?
@futurebird there's no such thing as reality anymore. Anything goes. All vibes.
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RE: https://flipboard.com/@newyorktimes/u.s.-6tjik97dz/-/a-VFo4INq0Rha0KLYBXX6HbA%3Aa%3A3195393-%2F0
Hold on. Did they talk to teleportation experts? What kind of expert do you get for this one?
I am also dubious. Everyone is dubious.
I guess object permanence isn't a FEMA job qualification?
@futurebird No other aspect of maturity is; why would object permanence be different?
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@futurebird honestly waffle house on shrooms is probably amazing, i support the FEMA dude
The Waffle House nearest @FWA on shrooms is probably the best such experience
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The Waffle House nearest @FWA on shrooms is probably the best such experience
@ZiggyTheHamster @futurebird @FWA as a trans person, i don't go to the state of georgia
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RE: https://flipboard.com/@newyorktimes/u.s.-6tjik97dz/-/a-VFo4INq0Rha0KLYBXX6HbA%3Aa%3A3195393-%2F0
Hold on. Did they talk to teleportation experts? What kind of expert do you get for this one?
I am also dubious. Everyone is dubious.
I guess object permanence isn't a FEMA job qualification?
@futurebird
Quantum teleportation is a thing, so I guess they could ask some quantum optics guys.Who will say "fuck no, he's got mental problems" like everyone else.
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RE: https://flipboard.com/@newyorktimes/u.s.-6tjik97dz/-/a-VFo4INq0Rha0KLYBXX6HbA%3Aa%3A3195393-%2F0
Hold on. Did they talk to teleportation experts? What kind of expert do you get for this one?
I am also dubious. Everyone is dubious.
I guess object permanence isn't a FEMA job qualification?
@futurebird waffle house is actually the default spawn point that you get reset to when you fall out of bounds. don't ask me how i know
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@troublewithwords @futurebird Okay but to be fair the ability to teleport instantly to a Waffle House in an area affected by a natural disaster should reduce FEMA response times significantly.
@msbellows @troublewithwords @futurebird The amount of data is off the scale. Down to mitochondria. I love Trek but there’s no way we can transport. Let alone to a Waffle House.
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RE: https://flipboard.com/@newyorktimes/u.s.-6tjik97dz/-/a-VFo4INq0Rha0KLYBXX6HbA%3Aa%3A3195393-%2F0
Hold on. Did they talk to teleportation experts? What kind of expert do you get for this one?
I am also dubious. Everyone is dubious.
I guess object permanence isn't a FEMA job qualification?
@futurebird he should try speedrunning games with his abilities, this stuff is straight out of quadrazid's half-life world record
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@futurebird waffle house is actually the default spawn point that you get reset to when you fall out of bounds. don't ask me how i know
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