I hope John Roberts can't watch the NFL playoff games today because he has explosive diarrhea.
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@msbellows You make me chuckle every day.
@firefly That makes me glad. Sometimes I wonder if I'm just cursing into the void like usual.
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@firefly That makes me glad. Sometimes I wonder if I'm just cursing into the void like usual.
@msbellows Well, there’s value in that, TOO.
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I hope today John Roberts tries to pick up a neighbor's cute, nice-seeming cat for a cuddle and it freaks out and scratches him badly right on the cheek.
I hope John Roberts' shoelace breaks, and not at home where he could just change shoes. And that those shoes have fairly short laces anyway, and that it breaks right at the eyelet where the knot will get in the way.
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I hope John Roberts' shoelace breaks, and not at home where he could just change shoes. And that those shoes have fairly short laces anyway, and that it breaks right at the eyelet where the knot will get in the way.
@msbellows oddly specific
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@msbellows oddly specific
@TimothyRoes Good curses require focus to be effective.
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@TimothyRoes Good curses require focus to be effective.
@msbellows This one's specific enough to travel down the blood line, ... like the one on the house of Atreus that led to Agamemnon's demise
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@msbellows This one's specific enough to travel down the blood line, ... like the one on the house of Atreus that led to Agamemnon's demise
@TimothyRoes So you're saying that 100 years from now Roberts' great great great grandchild's shoelace will break, slowing the delivery of a vital message and ultimately leading to the final demise of the American empire?
Cool, cool, I'm good with that.
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I hope John Roberts' shoelace breaks, and not at home where he could just change shoes. And that those shoes have fairly short laces anyway, and that it breaks right at the eyelet where the knot will get in the way.
Yes, I’m beginning to feel the catharsis
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Yes, I’m beginning to feel the catharsis
@GhostOnTheHalfShell Excellent. That is my purpose. Steady, small, drip by drip.
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I hope John Roberts' shoelace breaks, and not at home where he could just change shoes. And that those shoes have fairly short laces anyway, and that it breaks right at the eyelet where the knot will get in the way.
If it's the John Roberts that I'm thinking of, I hope more than his shoelace breaks.
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If it's the John Roberts that I'm thinking of, I hope more than his shoelace breaks.
@nanowiz ((It's the John Roberts you're thinking of. And don't worry about it not being enough; there's a whole thread of curses!))
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@nanowiz _/\_
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I hope John Roberts' shoelace breaks, and not at home where he could just change shoes. And that those shoes have fairly short laces anyway, and that it breaks right at the eyelet where the knot will get in the way.
I hope John Roberts orders Chinese for lunch and it comes with those chopsticks that are rectangular in cross-section instead of round and when he separates them it splinters just a little and he gets a tiny splinter in the ball of his index finger and it's one of those splinters that's set so deeply there's only a tiny little nub sticking out that's not enough to grab with tweezers but every time he picks up a pen or taps a keyboard it jiggles it and hurts annoyingly.
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I hope John Roberts orders Chinese for lunch and it comes with those chopsticks that are rectangular in cross-section instead of round and when he separates them it splinters just a little and he gets a tiny splinter in the ball of his index finger and it's one of those splinters that's set so deeply there's only a tiny little nub sticking out that's not enough to grab with tweezers but every time he picks up a pen or taps a keyboard it jiggles it and hurts annoyingly.
@msbellows I hope that the Chinese food gives him atomic, painful, explosive diarrhea.
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@msbellows I hope that the Chinese food gives him atomic, painful, explosive diarrhea.
@david So so I, but that would impugn a proof and delicious ethnic cuisine, and also I already used that wish in the very first curse in this long thread.
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@david So so I, but that would impugn a proof and delicious ethnic cuisine, and also I already used that wish in the very first curse in this long thread.
@msbellows Jiminy! How did I miss all of these??
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@msbellows Jiminy! How did I miss all of these??
@david Easy answer: you're a slacker! (Said by a fellow slacker, so don't worry, I'm not judging you.)
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@david Easy answer: you're a slacker! (Said by a fellow slacker, so don't worry, I'm not judging you.)
@msbellows I'm definitely a slacker. Always was…
School: ”We feel you are an underachiever despite your high IQ.”
Me: “Whatever.”
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@msbellows I'm definitely a slacker. Always was…
School: ”We feel you are an underachiever despite your high IQ.”
Me: “Whatever.”
@david Also, it's probably a "tell" that I'm defining "slacker" as "someone who doesn't spend enough time on Mastodon to catch every single one of my posts in real time."
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I hope John Roberts orders Chinese for lunch and it comes with those chopsticks that are rectangular in cross-section instead of round and when he separates them it splinters just a little and he gets a tiny splinter in the ball of his index finger and it's one of those splinters that's set so deeply there's only a tiny little nub sticking out that's not enough to grab with tweezers but every time he picks up a pen or taps a keyboard it jiggles it and hurts annoyingly.
You might enjoy a work of satire I wrote in 2024, following Trump's reelection.
Evil Sorcerers Need to Rediscover the Art of Subtlety
By Malakai Castlequill What follows is either a mediocre attempt at satire, or an opinion column originally published in the Wiz...
(jasonbeets.blogspot.com)
