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  3. Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

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  • dougwade@mastodon.xyzD dougwade@mastodon.xyz

    @alice oh I see you’re also watching the reign game

    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
    alice@lgbtqia.space
    wrote last edited by
    #6

    @dougwade reign?

    stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS 1 Reply Last reply
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    • dougwade@mastodon.xyzD dougwade@mastodon.xyz

      @alice oh I see you’re also watching the reign game

      stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS This user is from outside of this forum
      stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS This user is from outside of this forum
      stephaniepixie@fandom.garden
      wrote last edited by
      #7

      @dougwade Traumatic only if you’re a reign fan 😅

      dougwade@mastodon.xyzD 1 Reply Last reply
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      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

        @dougwade reign?

        stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS This user is from outside of this forum
        stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS This user is from outside of this forum
        stephaniepixie@fandom.garden
        wrote last edited by
        #8

        @alice @dougwade Sportsball reference

        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
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        • stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS stephaniepixie@fandom.garden

          @alice @dougwade Sportsball reference

          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
          alice@lgbtqia.space
          wrote last edited by
          #9

          @stephaniepixie @dougwade ah, I see.

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS stephaniepixie@fandom.garden

            @dougwade Traumatic only if you’re a reign fan 😅

            dougwade@mastodon.xyzD This user is from outside of this forum
            dougwade@mastodon.xyzD This user is from outside of this forum
            dougwade@mastodon.xyz
            wrote last edited by
            #10

            @stephaniepixie stephanie. the thorns? how could you do this to me?

            stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS 1 Reply Last reply
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            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

              Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

              Just FYI.

              peachfiend@mastodon.sdf.orgP This user is from outside of this forum
              peachfiend@mastodon.sdf.orgP This user is from outside of this forum
              peachfiend@mastodon.sdf.org
              wrote last edited by
              #11

              @alice huh. synchronicity is weird.
              i was just telling my partner, then a few days later my therapist, how my depression has changed since coming out. my sarcasm has abated. not entirely. shitposting is still hella fun sometimes. but in difficult conversations when before i may have deflected or redirected with "humor" where i just... don't now. i still catch myself sometimes, but that's 40+ years of muscle memory. i guess most notably, i notice it now. it's no longer automatic.

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

                Just FYI.

                rootwyrm@weird.autosR This user is from outside of this forum
                rootwyrm@weird.autosR This user is from outside of this forum
                rootwyrm@weird.autos
                wrote last edited by
                #12

                @alice ah, that explains my humor.
                The last time someone described it as 'dark,' someone responded roughly: "RootWyrm's humor isn't dark, it is well beyond the event horizon of a black hole. Except funny."

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • dougwade@mastodon.xyzD dougwade@mastodon.xyz

                  @stephaniepixie stephanie. the thorns? how could you do this to me?

                  stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS This user is from outside of this forum
                  stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS This user is from outside of this forum
                  stephaniepixie@fandom.garden
                  wrote last edited by
                  #13

                  @dougwade Oh no no no. I am not a Thorns fan. Don’t worry 😅 If I had to choose I’d pick Seattle, but I consider Vancouver home (even though I no longer live there) so I have a hard time rooting for either West Coast team.
                  Just pointing out the obvious that it’s not traumatic for Portland fans. Forgive me. It was salt on the wound.
                  I love Laura Harvey and fiery little dragon 🐟🔒 so I wish them success.

                  dougwade@mastodon.xyzD 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                    Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

                    Just FYI.

                    cerement@social.targaryen.houseC This user is from outside of this forum
                    cerement@social.targaryen.houseC This user is from outside of this forum
                    cerement@social.targaryen.house
                    wrote last edited by
                    #14

                    @alice

                    > “You honestly didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Few people ever cried more than once, if you’d used that up, you laughed.”

                    —Michael David Herr, *Dispatches* (1977) (writing for *Esquire* during Vietnam War)

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS stephaniepixie@fandom.garden

                      @dougwade Oh no no no. I am not a Thorns fan. Don’t worry 😅 If I had to choose I’d pick Seattle, but I consider Vancouver home (even though I no longer live there) so I have a hard time rooting for either West Coast team.
                      Just pointing out the obvious that it’s not traumatic for Portland fans. Forgive me. It was salt on the wound.
                      I love Laura Harvey and fiery little dragon 🐟🔒 so I wish them success.

                      dougwade@mastodon.xyzD This user is from outside of this forum
                      dougwade@mastodon.xyzD This user is from outside of this forum
                      dougwade@mastodon.xyz
                      wrote last edited by
                      #15

                      @stephaniepixie when does nsl kick off? I haven’t followed the league at all, but I love a Cascadia team and could be persuaded to follow Vancouver. Do you still have Themporer Quinn?

                      stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • dougwade@mastodon.xyzD dougwade@mastodon.xyz

                        @stephaniepixie when does nsl kick off? I haven’t followed the league at all, but I love a Cascadia team and could be persuaded to follow Vancouver. Do you still have Themporer Quinn?

                        stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS This user is from outside of this forum
                        stephaniepixie@fandom.gardenS This user is from outside of this forum
                        stephaniepixie@fandom.garden
                        wrote last edited by
                        #16

                        @dougwade “Themperor” 😂 I didn’t know anyone used that nickname for Quinn. As far as I know they’re still with the Rise and so is Nikki Stanton. Quinn scored more goals in one season with the Rise than any other club. Not to mention the Rise won the championship in the league’s inaugural season. Very successful.

                        First game of the season will be Friday April 24th in Vancouver vs Toronto AFC (rematch of the playoff final).

                        Some matches are on the league YouTube page but I believe ESPN will air NSL matches again this year in the US.
                        You might catch a few more players who end up transferring over to the NWSL like Holly Ward did for Seattle.

                        Link Preview Image
                        From Breakout Debut to Season Two: Northern Super League Releases 2026 Schedule

                        Canada’s first professional women’s soccer league returns, building on a debut year defined by energy, fierce competition, and fan connectionCANADA — Thursday, February 5, 2026  — Northern Super League today announced its 2026 regular season schedule, returning for a second season after a debut y...

                        favicon

                        NSL - Official site of the Northern Super League (www.nsl.ca)

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                        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                          Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

                          Just FYI.

                          violet@corteximplant.comV This user is from outside of this forum
                          violet@corteximplant.comV This user is from outside of this forum
                          violet@corteximplant.com
                          wrote last edited by
                          #17

                          @alice This is so important to recognize. I can't count the number of times my gallows humor has had me ostracized when all I was trying to do was echo locate someone who would understand me. Maybe even advocate for me

                          moriel@chaosfem.twM 1 Reply Last reply
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                          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                            Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

                            Just FYI.

                            azonenberg@ioc.exchangeA This user is from outside of this forum
                            azonenberg@ioc.exchangeA This user is from outside of this forum
                            azonenberg@ioc.exchange
                            wrote last edited by
                            #18

                            @alice Yeeeeeep. Spend a bit of time around firefighters and EMTs and the like and you'll get plenty of it

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                              Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

                              Just FYI.

                              aprazeth@mstdn.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                              aprazeth@mstdn.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
                              aprazeth@mstdn.social
                              wrote last edited by
                              #19

                              @alice

                              True, so very painfully true. And I think this apples even, perhaps especially, with the self deprecating kind.

                              Trauma comes in many forms, and almost always produces emotional/physical/psychological scars and thus coping mechanisms. Some of those people may not even realize themselves to be coping mechanisms.

                              🩵

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • violet@corteximplant.comV violet@corteximplant.com

                                @alice This is so important to recognize. I can't count the number of times my gallows humor has had me ostracized when all I was trying to do was echo locate someone who would understand me. Maybe even advocate for me

                                moriel@chaosfem.twM This user is from outside of this forum
                                moriel@chaosfem.twM This user is from outside of this forum
                                moriel@chaosfem.tw
                                wrote last edited by
                                #20

                                @violet @alice

                                Oh I LOVE that description!

                                "echo locate someone who would understand me"

                                I'm going to use that from now on!

                                1 Reply Last reply
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                                • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                  Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

                                  Just FYI.

                                  not_a_label@toot.lgbtN This user is from outside of this forum
                                  not_a_label@toot.lgbtN This user is from outside of this forum
                                  not_a_label@toot.lgbt
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #21

                                  @alice my last two exes were ER doctors - can confirm!

                                  1 Reply Last reply
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                                  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                    Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

                                    Just FYI.

                                    cppguy@infosec.spaceC This user is from outside of this forum
                                    cppguy@infosec.spaceC This user is from outside of this forum
                                    cppguy@infosec.space
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #22

                                    @alice

                                    And dark humour can get you ostracised, leading to even more trauma. 😖

                                    cppguy@infosec.spaceC 1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • cppguy@infosec.spaceC cppguy@infosec.space

                                      @alice

                                      And dark humour can get you ostracised, leading to even more trauma. 😖

                                      cppguy@infosec.spaceC This user is from outside of this forum
                                      cppguy@infosec.spaceC This user is from outside of this forum
                                      cppguy@infosec.space
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #23

                                      @alice

                                      You've made me realise just how much I censor myself, here on Fedi and in meatspace. I keep the dark-humour dial close to zero for fear of alienating people, and I've been doing it for so long that I was no longer even conscious of doing it.

                                      Thanks for today's big insight, Alice. 🙂

                                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • cppguy@infosec.spaceC cppguy@infosec.space

                                        @alice

                                        You've made me realise just how much I censor myself, here on Fedi and in meatspace. I keep the dark-humour dial close to zero for fear of alienating people, and I've been doing it for so long that I was no longer even conscious of doing it.

                                        Thanks for today's big insight, Alice. 🙂

                                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alice@lgbtqia.space
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #24

                                        @CppGuy gallows humor can be a good bonding response, as long as you keep the self-deprecation at bay, and don't point sarcasm at potential allies.

                                        cppguy@infosec.spaceC 1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                          Dark humor is a coping mechanism for dealing with repeated exposure to trauma.

                                          Just FYI.

                                          randamumaki@mstdn.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
                                          randamumaki@mstdn.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
                                          randamumaki@mstdn.social
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #25

                                          @alice I like my humour dark, like my coffee, and my chocolate.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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