I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account...
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets Thx for the diagram! I find most of the paths very logical and obvious. But that last 'did you ask' box before you get to 'not mansplaining' is a bit of an eye opener.
How should we phrase that question though? I'm afraid that 'would you like me to explain that?' would be really condescending :^]. -
@sundogplanets Thx for the diagram! I find most of the paths very logical and obvious. But that last 'did you ask' box before you get to 'not mansplaining' is a bit of an eye opener.
How should we phrase that question though? I'm afraid that 'would you like me to explain that?' would be really condescending :^].@ives @sundogplanets Here is my suggestion. When you feel yourself about to explain something, ask her "Are you familiar with _____?". She can either tell you what she knows or ask for an explanation so, that the two of you can establish a common starting point for the next part of conversation.
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@ives @sundogplanets Here is my suggestion. When you feel yourself about to explain something, ask her "Are you familiar with _____?". She can either tell you what she knows or ask for an explanation so, that the two of you can establish a common starting point for the next part of conversation.
@LauraleeDukeshire @sundogplanets Simple and elegant... thx!
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@sundogplanets T-shirts?
For conferences, print a compact version that fits inside the plastic pocket you get for your conference ID and put it in the back, so you can just flip the badge to show it.
Handing over your card with this chart could be fun too.
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets i love this flowchart
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@socketwench I LOVE THIS IDEA
Shall we crowd fund this?
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@LauraleeDukeshire @sundogplanets Simple and elegant... thx!
@ives @sundogplanets I'll also add that if one catches themself mansplaining (ie. One is explaining and sees "that look" on her face), one can always course correct with a quick, "sorry, I didn't ask if you already know this." And see what she says. A lot of us will appreciate and give grace to someone who is trying to do better.
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets This is so, so excellent!
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets yes! Even using the starting question alone says volumes
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets …totally tempted to explain to you how to do a proper flow diagram.
[which is humor…btw]
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets Perfect, now I just need one for reply-guying.
Say, is there any chance you can get this one into orbit?
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets On the downside, I don't read people's pinned posts before replying to them. On the upside, I don't see how could pinning it possibly hurt
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@ives @sundogplanets I'll also add that if one catches themself mansplaining (ie. One is explaining and sees "that look" on her face), one can always course correct with a quick, "sorry, I didn't ask if you already know this." And see what she says. A lot of us will appreciate and give grace to someone who is trying to do better.
@LauraleeDukeshire @ives @sundogplanets this seems the right way.
Everything in the diagram after "No" is assumptions and we all know some things about how those go.
If I assume a thing is known, and it's not, then things go poorly. If I don't assume a thing and mansplain things go poorly.
The question cuts the assumptions and ensures things go well. I've done this in the past but I still need to work harder to make sure it's the default. I appreciate the reminder!
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets The fact that a flow chart is needed
The actual culprits probably wouldn't even bother reading through this though -
I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets i feel like we need a box with the question "are you explaining something?"
Because that does come up.
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets Is she wrong, and do you want to explain it to her just as you would explain it to a man? Don’t do that—with a woman, that’s mansplaining!
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@sundogplanets T-shirts?
For conferences, print a compact version that fits inside the plastic pocket you get for your conference ID and put it in the back, so you can just flip the badge to show it.
@Karen5Lund That's exactly what I wanted to suggest: print it on a paper that fits badges for conferences! @sundogplanets
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@ives @sundogplanets Here is my suggestion. When you feel yourself about to explain something, ask her "Are you familiar with _____?". She can either tell you what she knows or ask for an explanation so, that the two of you can establish a common starting point for the next part of conversation.
@LauraleeDukeshire @ives @sundogplanets I'm a woman and I do this all the time. In my work I'm frequently meeting people for the first time and I'm unsure how much info they have on the subject of the meeting. So often my first question is just what you said: "are you familiar with X, or would it help if I gave some background?" It works!
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I am... really tempted to pin this to the top of my account... Print it and put it on my office door... send it as my email signature... wear it around my neck at conferences....
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20180727-mansplaining-explained-in-one-chart@sundogplanets I would like to point out that it's not uncommon for #actuallyautistic #communication to be mistaken for #mansplaining.
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@LauraleeDukeshire @ives @sundogplanets I'm a woman and I do this all the time. In my work I'm frequently meeting people for the first time and I'm unsure how much info they have on the subject of the meeting. So often my first question is just what you said: "are you familiar with X, or would it help if I gave some background?" It works!
@ives @sundogplanets @lauerhahn @LauraleeDukeshire I gotta say, that phrasing particularly is really bad for me as an autistic person. All I wind up thinking is “I don’t know what you consider familiarity and if it’s the same thing I consider familiar, I wish you’d just give me the background that you think is relevant to your point, and let me filter for myself if it’s useful right now”
It winds up with so many meetings going poorly because there is no universal and usefully external measure of familiarity with a given topic
