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  3. It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

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  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

    @rosaaeterna what makes those two jerks?

    rosaaeterna@transfem.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
    rosaaeterna@transfem.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
    rosaaeterna@transfem.social
    wrote last edited by
    #62

    @alice@lgbtqia.space Well for one, they're both maaaajor invasive agricultural pests. They have no natural predators in the US, and they both love eating up trees and crops. Spotted lanternflies are estimated to be causing hundreds of millions of dollars in agricultural and forestry damages in Pennsylvania alone. Marmorated stink bugs cause even more agricultural damage, although they don't tend to hurt the trees themselves so much compared to the lanternflies.

    Lanternflies are also annoying as hell to deal with because they can jump pretty far distances, making them hard to quickly kill. Marmorated stink bugs breed like mad, love to invade homes, and as their names would suggest they have a potent odor as a self-defense mechanism that they love to use on you if they feel like it.

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

      It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

      Humans? Legendary assholes.
      Dolphins? Assholes.
      Cats are notorious for being jerks.

      Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

      What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

      Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

      koushiniku@hachyderm.ioK This user is from outside of this forum
      koushiniku@hachyderm.ioK This user is from outside of this forum
      koushiniku@hachyderm.io
      wrote last edited by
      #63

      @alice The male of any species for which people use the the word “rut”?

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

        It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

        Humans? Legendary assholes.
        Dolphins? Assholes.
        Cats are notorious for being jerks.

        Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

        What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

        Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

        renardboy@mastodon.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
        renardboy@mastodon.socialR This user is from outside of this forum
        renardboy@mastodon.social
        wrote last edited by
        #64

        @alice does it count if the assholery is embedded into the lifecycle? If so I'll raise you the parasitoid wasps, any one of them really.

        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

          It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

          Humans? Legendary assholes.
          Dolphins? Assholes.
          Cats are notorious for being jerks.

          Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

          What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

          Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

          catsalad@infosec.exchangeC This user is from outside of this forum
          catsalad@infosec.exchangeC This user is from outside of this forum
          catsalad@infosec.exchange
          wrote last edited by
          #65

          @alice Slander! Cats aren't jerks, they're just better than everything else (including other cats)

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

            It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

            Humans? Legendary assholes.
            Dolphins? Assholes.
            Cats are notorious for being jerks.

            Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

            What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

            Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

            jqmcd@sfba.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
            jqmcd@sfba.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
            jqmcd@sfba.social
            wrote last edited by
            #66

            @alice Spiders 🕷️🕸️

            alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • mattblaze@federate.socialM mattblaze@federate.social

              @alice Wasps are jerks. Total sociopaths.

              catsalad@infosec.exchangeC This user is from outside of this forum
              catsalad@infosec.exchangeC This user is from outside of this forum
              catsalad@infosec.exchange
              wrote last edited by
              #67

              @mattblaze @alice Can confirm! 😭

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

                Humans? Legendary assholes.
                Dolphins? Assholes.
                Cats are notorious for being jerks.

                Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

                What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

                Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

                eedly@mindly.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
                eedly@mindly.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
                eedly@mindly.social
                wrote last edited by
                #68

                @alice Turkeys. Dumb and mean.

                In the spring, the males travel in packs and try to corner individual females. Their usual downfall is that their aggressive mating behavior is also aggressive fighting behavior, and nine times out of ten the pack members will completely forget who they were chasing and attack each other.

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • roknrol@beige.partyR roknrol@beige.party

                  @alice He's not shitting on you?

                  I mean, with limited ways to communicate with those big stupid humans that seems downright polite.

                  Forget to feed your cat or your kid for an hour and see if you just get a love tap 😂

                  kishi@meow.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                  kishi@meow.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                  kishi@meow.social
                  wrote last edited by
                  #69

                  @roknrol @alice

                  crows don't poop while flying!

                  alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • kishi@meow.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                    kishi@meow.socialK This user is from outside of this forum
                    kishi@meow.social
                    wrote last edited by
                    #70

                    @MrInappropriate @joshsusser @alice

                    I'm so glad someone else can learn this. Actually came to say this about hermit crabs. They truly are extremely helpful to each other like this. Conga line shell swap as they grow.

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • renardboy@mastodon.socialR renardboy@mastodon.social

                      @alice does it count if the assholery is embedded into the lifecycle? If so I'll raise you the parasitoid wasps, any one of them really.

                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                      alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                      alice@lgbtqia.space
                      wrote last edited by
                      #71

                      @renardboy I think it has to be an individual choice for it to count.

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • jqmcd@sfba.socialJ jqmcd@sfba.social

                        @alice Spiders 🕷️🕸️

                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                        alice@lgbtqia.space
                        wrote last edited by
                        #72

                        @jqmcd aww, I like spiders (mostly).

                        1 Reply Last reply
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                        • kishi@meow.socialK kishi@meow.social

                          @roknrol @alice

                          crows don't poop while flying!

                          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                          alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                          alice@lgbtqia.space
                          wrote last edited by
                          #73

                          @Kishi I wouldn't either if I could fly.

                          @roknrol

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                            It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

                            Humans? Legendary assholes.
                            Dolphins? Assholes.
                            Cats are notorious for being jerks.

                            Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

                            What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

                            Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

                            mrbirch@beige.partyM This user is from outside of this forum
                            mrbirch@beige.partyM This user is from outside of this forum
                            mrbirch@beige.party
                            wrote last edited by
                            #74

                            @alice Hummingbirds are notorious assholes.

                            apontious@dice.campA 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                              It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

                              Humans? Legendary assholes.
                              Dolphins? Assholes.
                              Cats are notorious for being jerks.

                              Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

                              What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

                              Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

                              dukeduke@mastodon.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
                              dukeduke@mastodon.socialD This user is from outside of this forum
                              dukeduke@mastodon.social
                              wrote last edited by
                              #75

                              @alice Canadian geeseholes have to be top 5.

                              (video source unknown)

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              0
                              • mrbirch@beige.partyM mrbirch@beige.party

                                @alice Hummingbirds are notorious assholes.

                                apontious@dice.campA This user is from outside of this forum
                                apontious@dice.campA This user is from outside of this forum
                                apontious@dice.camp
                                wrote last edited by
                                #76

                                @MrBirch @alice I-is that true? I want it to be true.

                                alice@lgbtqia.spaceA mrbirch@beige.partyM 2 Replies Last reply
                                0
                                • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                  It seems that as a species develops more emphasis on brains, it also produces more assholes.

                                  Humans? Legendary assholes.
                                  Dolphins? Assholes.
                                  Cats are notorious for being jerks.

                                  Dogs, ducks, geese, seagulls, crows...all have dickish individuals.

                                  What're some species that would be least likely to solve a crossword puzzle, but still produce a significant percentage of assholes?

                                  Like are there any shrimp out there that are just little fuckers?

                                  jhooper@techhub.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                  jhooper@techhub.socialJ This user is from outside of this forum
                                  jhooper@techhub.social
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #77

                                  @alice When humans develop on utero, the first thing that develops is the digestive system and the anus.

                                  So we all start out as little assholes. For some, little has changed aside from size.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                    One summer while I was wearing shorts, I had a big hornet fly over, bite into the side of my thigh and then proceed to sting me like half a dozen times for no apparent reason.

                                    I feel like hornets, wasps, and yellow jackets are all pretty much raging assholes.

                                    catsalad@infosec.exchangeC This user is from outside of this forum
                                    catsalad@infosec.exchangeC This user is from outside of this forum
                                    catsalad@infosec.exchange
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #78

                                    @alice You're so 🫦, even hornets want a piece of you!

                                    alice@lgbtqia.spaceA 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • alice@lgbtqia.spaceA alice@lgbtqia.space

                                      One summer while I was wearing shorts, I had a big hornet fly over, bite into the side of my thigh and then proceed to sting me like half a dozen times for no apparent reason.

                                      I feel like hornets, wasps, and yellow jackets are all pretty much raging assholes.

                                      silvermoon82@wandering.shopS This user is from outside of this forum
                                      silvermoon82@wandering.shopS This user is from outside of this forum
                                      silvermoon82@wandering.shop
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #79

                                      @alice
                                      I've been stung by wasps twice in the last couple weeks, for no fault of my own.

                                      Bastard assholes. Hate them, and they me.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • apontious@dice.campA apontious@dice.camp

                                        @MrBirch @alice I-is that true? I want it to be true.

                                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alice@lgbtqia.spaceA This user is from outside of this forum
                                        alice@lgbtqia.space
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #80

                                        @apontious totally true.

                                        @MrBirch

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • apontious@dice.campA apontious@dice.camp

                                          @MrBirch @alice I-is that true? I want it to be true.

                                          mrbirch@beige.partyM This user is from outside of this forum
                                          mrbirch@beige.partyM This user is from outside of this forum
                                          mrbirch@beige.party
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #81

                                          @apontious @alice Oh yeah. We’ve had hummingbird feeder for a long time. There’s plenty of nectar to go around but the birds are super territorial and will chase others off. Real aerial combat.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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