CIRCLE WITH A DOT

@evilyn I came out publicly in 2014, got the legal stuff sorted 6 months later. I had to hang on, be happy for small successes until 2018 to find a better employment. Better, not perfect.

But life as myself is worth it. Always.

@evilyn I am so sorry you have to go through this. Actually it is the problem of individuals, and even if they are a lot, it is something you cannot police out of people's mind. Unfortunately media and politics fuel the hate, especially at the country you live.

After I transitioned, I had a load of dirt to eat, as the world is small, especially within some industries. Company policies is fine, but there is nothing to make anyone use them, besides you. Being trans stayed with me my entire working life, until I retired.

Option 1: Hang on. With teeth and claws. Maybe it helps to think that a jobs purpose is to pay the bills. Not a vocation. Your colleagues are ppl you happen to work with. Not friends material.

At one occasion I took notes during one of the scarier meetings with my team lead. I sent the notes to his manager, threatening that this would end up as a HR case, if that behaviour did not stop. I said "I do not want that, but if you force a hand..." Then I had to send the notes to the next level manager, claiming the same. I got a transfer within 6 months. Problems got worse, again with individuals. Finally I got a compensation package for not sueing, and left that company, before things had a chance to blow over.

Option 2: You look for a new job, with the hard question of disclosing your past. There are pros and cons for both. I tried to get hired by people who knew me, knew about me, no chance of even an interview. Then I landed a new job which I was especially qualified for, without disclosing, but got outed by a former colleague even before I started. I got lucky, it did not matter. That company was better, but I had gotten accostumed that not many asked me along to have lunch with them, without a business reason.

Transitioning is not for cowards. I agree. It is not easy. But worth it. Totally worth it.