CIRCLE WITH A DOT

RE: https://live.acarsdrama.com/@acarsdrama/116573374088027686

"I'll just put this over here with the other vomit"

our vet has a serious version of the “oh lawd he comin’” graphic

RE: https://live.acarsdrama.com/@acarsdrama/116563653915617265

risky move as rumors of a new pandemic swirl

Trump was just asked if he considered Americans' financial situation when negotiating with Iran, and his response was "not at all, the only thing I think about is Iran can't have a nuclear weapon, I don't think of Americans' financial situation at all."

@feld i get maybe one useful thing every 120 days

@feld i’m a vp at a tech company which means its a hazard of the job

they paid a ransom to criminals with nothing but a pinky promise they wouldn’t do more crimes and yet this linkedin notification makes it sound like they entered into a strategic partnership to deliver value for their customers

just got off a call where a vendor kept referring to their ai agent as “she” or “her” and now i want to cry

its software.

question for my fellow brits who have married or are otherwise in romantic relationships with Americans - my wife and I are having a disagreement so I need to collect some data to back up my position:

How often is it appropriate to declare “the british are coming! as intercourse reaches it’s natural conclusion?”

my wife got to choose todays food because its mothers day and we got papusas and my goodness were they amazin’

“Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

“How’s he doing.”

“Take a seat.”

“Oh no.”

“Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

“Please, just give it to me straight.”

“Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

“It has firmware?”

“Yes.”

“But it’s a soldering iron?”

“Yes.”

“So there is nothing you can do for it?”

“Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

“But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

“Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

“But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

“With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

“What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

“Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

“But how?”

“Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

“Ah man this is going to be rough.”

“Would you like to see him?”

“Not like this.”

#microfiction

RE: https://live.acarsdrama.com/@acarsdrama/116547417830390341

HAVE ANY OF THEM RECENTLY BEEN ON A CRUISE QM

can you imagine if they put as much effort into actually doing public service as they do gerrymandering

RE: https://live.acarsdrama.com/@acarsdrama/116539565556176717

quacko and berto sound like top bros

RE: https://live.acarsdrama.com/@acarsdrama/116539620553460068

i mean that is their whole job

RE: https://live.acarsdrama.com/@acarsdrama/116535817873407544

fuckin todd man

uncle kash’s eye poppin’ bourbon

on one shoulder is my health insurance deductible i haven't hit, and a pile of onboarding forms that i'd have to fill out to go to the dermatologist

on the other is a pair of tweezers with a sharp point and some rubbing alcohol

in the middle of it all, a tiny, but annoying skin tag on my eyelid

america 250

Spirit Airlines should just be like, "oh, btw, we're pivoting to AI" and people would be like, "woah, here have some money!"

Then, when they just carry on being a (sorta) airline, and not AI, and people are like "huh, wheres the AI?" They can be all "oh, our bad, we meant AIR but forgot the R".

Follow me for more business strategy tips.

@kieran i dunno if we can officially count it yet because it didn’t mention acars drama in an acars, but this is the closest we’ve been for sure