A Short Story Inspired by Recent Conversations
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Seeing my confusion she continued “Our system has shown that somewhere, a few meters from this exact location a moment of peak synchronicity and happiness is … inevitable.”
The alien gazed at me expectedly. I gazed back, stunned to silence.
“It’s not you, is it?” Said the alien.
Slowly, I shook my head “no.”
And of course, I could not be the subject of a moment of “peak happiness” what could be more absurd?
2/
As if to confirm this, the alien looked sharply up to a regiment of a leaf-cutter ants, each one carrying her green prize like a flag along a slender branch on the margin of the rainforest. To my eye they all looked identical, but the alien trained her holographic recording device on one particular ant.
“This one.” the alien said. “this ant has just cut a perfect portion of the leaf. It has a perfect level of moisture that will exactly match the needs of her colony.” 3/
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As if to confirm this, the alien looked sharply up to a regiment of a leaf-cutter ants, each one carrying her green prize like a flag along a slender branch on the margin of the rainforest. To my eye they all looked identical, but the alien trained her holographic recording device on one particular ant.
“This one.” the alien said. “this ant has just cut a perfect portion of the leaf. It has a perfect level of moisture that will exactly match the needs of her colony.” 3/
“She knows it is not possible for her leaf to be delivered any more swiftly to the mandibles of her sisters. Peak joy.”
I could not deny it, for all that the ants were identical. The ant did seem to lift her tiny legs just a little bit higher.
She was at the center of some rarely glimpsed but vast and beautiful machine: her black compound eyes drinking in the green of the midday forest, it was singing back to her “You are going the right way! You have a purpose! You fulfill it by being!” 4/
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“She knows it is not possible for her leaf to be delivered any more swiftly to the mandibles of her sisters. Peak joy.”
I could not deny it, for all that the ants were identical. The ant did seem to lift her tiny legs just a little bit higher.
She was at the center of some rarely glimpsed but vast and beautiful machine: her black compound eyes drinking in the green of the midday forest, it was singing back to her “You are going the right way! You have a purpose! You fulfill it by being!” 4/
The alien let out a long wistful sigh, “Isn’t it wonderful? Don’t you wish you could know what it was like?”
This surprised me. “I think someone with an important job like yours, archiving happiness in all the known universe might know what it was like.”
“my job isn’t that important” the alien said “if I had my act together, I would work for a more significant division… like the one that records moments of perfect suffering. That’s considered to be a more serious & important area of study”
5/ -
The alien let out a long wistful sigh, “Isn’t it wonderful? Don’t you wish you could know what it was like?”
This surprised me. “I think someone with an important job like yours, archiving happiness in all the known universe might know what it was like.”
“my job isn’t that important” the alien said “if I had my act together, I would work for a more significant division… like the one that records moments of perfect suffering. That’s considered to be a more serious & important area of study”
5/“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
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“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
@futurebird Lovely!
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“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
@futurebird That's beautiful! Thank you!
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“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
@futurebird Reminds me of William Goldman. What a lovely story.
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“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
@futurebird Aw. I love that.
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R relay@relay.infosec.exchange shared this topic
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“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
@futurebird Finally, some myrme propaganda!
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A Short Story Inspired by Recent Conversations
“Important Work”
“We are archivists,” the alien explained, “we travel from solar system to solar system searching for events worthy of recording for our library.”
“I am responsible for archives of moments of great happiness.” The alien continued, “I seek beings in a perfect state of joy. That is why I have come to earth.” She beamed at me as if this made perfect sense.
1/
@futurebird My gosh, this is absolutely beautiful, and it feels to me like the opening chapter of a soon-to-be authored novel (I say with hope…).
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“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
@futurebird oh for Pete's sake. I'm not meant to be sniffling at this hour of the morning.
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“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
@futurebird@sauropods.win an ant-y climax
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A Short Story Inspired by Recent Conversations
“Important Work”
“We are archivists,” the alien explained, “we travel from solar system to solar system searching for events worthy of recording for our library.”
“I am responsible for archives of moments of great happiness.” The alien continued, “I seek beings in a perfect state of joy. That is why I have come to earth.” She beamed at me as if this made perfect sense.
1/
@futurebird I love it. Great work!
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Seeing my confusion she continued “Our system has shown that somewhere, a few meters from this exact location a moment of peak synchronicity and happiness is … inevitable.”
The alien gazed at me expectedly. I gazed back, stunned to silence.
“It’s not you, is it?” Said the alien.
Slowly, I shook my head “no.”
And of course, I could not be the subject of a moment of “peak happiness” what could be more absurd?
2/
@futurebird I'm just saying, this could also be the start of an #AltAfterDark story ...
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A Short Story Inspired by Recent Conversations
“Important Work”
“We are archivists,” the alien explained, “we travel from solar system to solar system searching for events worthy of recording for our library.”
“I am responsible for archives of moments of great happiness.” The alien continued, “I seek beings in a perfect state of joy. That is why I have come to earth.” She beamed at me as if this made perfect sense.
1/
@futurebird Was the alien insectoid? One wonders. Also, this story set me off to wondering about the political implications of a joy detector. Imagine what awful things an authoritarian regime could do with that. "Citizen! Why are you not deliriously happy in the brave new world that Dear Leader has provided for you?" Or the contrary, "Citizen! You are suspiciously joyful in the midst of your poverty and squalor. What thought-crime are you committing to be in this state?"
OK, I'll go back to thinking blissfully about the happy ant. It's a good story.
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@futurebird@sauropods.win an ant-y climax
@u0421793 @futurebird oh that's terrible...
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“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
@futurebird That was so wonderful!
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A Short Story Inspired by Recent Conversations
“Important Work”
“We are archivists,” the alien explained, “we travel from solar system to solar system searching for events worthy of recording for our library.”
“I am responsible for archives of moments of great happiness.” The alien continued, “I seek beings in a perfect state of joy. That is why I have come to earth.” She beamed at me as if this made perfect sense.
1/
@futurebird Wonderful!!
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R relay@relay.mycrowd.ca shared this topic
-
A Short Story Inspired by Recent Conversations
“Important Work”
“We are archivists,” the alien explained, “we travel from solar system to solar system searching for events worthy of recording for our library.”
“I am responsible for archives of moments of great happiness.” The alien continued, “I seek beings in a perfect state of joy. That is why I have come to earth.” She beamed at me as if this made perfect sense.
1/
@futurebird I love it. Only you could have written this story.
One question: who is the ant-agonist?
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“I think that’s terrible. Your work seems very important to me. I’m really impressed that such an archive even exists, and you are steward of one of the most beautiful parts of that archive.”
“really?” said the alien and she seemed so sincerely astonished and delighted by my appreciation, and I found myself wondering if she’d recorded the right event.6/6
(We must imagine the busy ant happy.)
@futurebird Absolutely exquisite. 🥰
