I just read a sentence that referred to “the decades since” 2005 and I feel personally attacked.
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@mina @Bugspriet @benroyce @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt I worked in a county museum as a student. The dads — the know-it-alls who’d read artefacts’ cards then announce what they’d just read as if they’d always Known All Things
— had a clear and complete chronology of humans in their heads: modern humans, pioneers (19th C), Vikings, ancient Egyptians, cave men + dinosaurs (as co-habitants). So easy!@tantramar @mina @Bugspriet @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt
i've always been confused as to if the ancient aliens that helped the maya are the same ancient aliens that helped the egyptians
(/s)
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@mina @Bugspriet @benroyce @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt I worked in a county museum as a student. The dads — the know-it-alls who’d read artefacts’ cards then announce what they’d just read as if they’d always Known All Things
— had a clear and complete chronology of humans in their heads: modern humans, pioneers (19th C), Vikings, ancient Egyptians, cave men + dinosaurs (as co-habitants). So easy!At least, they're gonna have smart kids!
@Bugspriet @benroyce @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt
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@mloxton @benroyce @TheBreadmonkey @overholt It’s the stripes that scarred me. Bell bottomed trousers with 3” orange, blue, and yellow stripes. Men would wear them. In public. The shame of being a preteen with a father who would wear such things, it has never faded. Verily, did my parents fly the freak flag high...and yet, when I showed signs of growing old enough to enjoy the freedom, they became yuppies and sent me to a convent. In another country. Because, boomers.
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@tantramar @mina @Bugspriet @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt
i've always been confused as to if the ancient aliens that helped the maya are the same ancient aliens that helped the egyptians
(/s)
@benroyce @tantramar @mina @Bugspriet @TheBreadmonkey @overholt Well, of course they were. What else explains all the Egyptian stuff in the Grand Canyon. It’s just science, man. 🧐
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it's kind of neat how time kaleidoscopes for a kid. the vikings and... wwi. sure, roughly the same time period. and older person: they must have been around
@benroyce @wendinoakland @overholt
It sounds like these kids are smarter than they let on. They're taking their dad for a ride. -
@benroyce @tantramar @mina @Bugspriet @TheBreadmonkey @overholt Well, of course they were. What else explains all the Egyptian stuff in the Grand Canyon. It’s just science, man. 🧐
@MissConstrue @tantramar @mina @Bugspriet @TheBreadmonkey @overholt
yeah luckily lewis and clark could get the ancient alien tech from the grand canyon to george washington just in time to beat the british in the revolutionary war. napoleon almost got it instead. that would have totally screwed with history, and i understand history well and can appreciate the implications (/s)
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you're not alone john, you're not alone
we are old
"born in the 1900s" is apparently ancient now. this poor dad just driving his kids to school gets absolutely roasted for it:
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@benroyce @wendinoakland @overholt
It sounds like these kids are smarter than they let on. They're taking their dad for a ride.@kolya @wendinoakland @overholt
"time to drive you to school"
"no dad, time for us to drive you to ego death"
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@benroyce @MissConstrue @mloxton @TheBreadmonkey @overholt Spare a thought for my ex-fiance, whose eccentric academic father would pick her up from school sporting a "mullet" haircut, wearing fitted floral shirts, flared corduroy trousers (corduroy has made a bit of a comeback in the UK today, but was deeply unfashionable at the time!) and...clogs. Wooden clogs.
She actually became quite tearful one evening after too much wine, remembering the shame and trauma it caused her to see him arrive.
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@benroyce @TheBreadmonkey @overholt My daughter once asked if I’d ever known “a hippy”, and I didn’t even know where to begin.
. I showed her pictures of her grandparents and me in our 70s gear. She laughed. A lot. ️🥳@MissConstrue @benroyce @TheBreadmonkey @overholt
KNOWN??? 
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@benroyce @MissConstrue @mloxton @TheBreadmonkey @overholt Spare a thought for my ex-fiance, whose eccentric academic father would pick her up from school sporting a "mullet" haircut, wearing fitted floral shirts, flared corduroy trousers (corduroy has made a bit of a comeback in the UK today, but was deeply unfashionable at the time!) and...clogs. Wooden clogs.
She actually became quite tearful one evening after too much wine, remembering the shame and trauma it caused her to see him arrive.
@ApostateEnglishman @MissConstrue @mloxton @TheBreadmonkey @overholt
well i know what i'm wearing today
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@benroyce @MissConstrue @mloxton @TheBreadmonkey @overholt Spare a thought for my ex-fiance, whose eccentric academic father would pick her up from school sporting a "mullet" haircut, wearing fitted floral shirts, flared corduroy trousers (corduroy has made a bit of a comeback in the UK today, but was deeply unfashionable at the time!) and...clogs. Wooden clogs.
She actually became quite tearful one evening after too much wine, remembering the shame and trauma it caused her to see him arrive.
@ApostateEnglishman
Paisley printed shirts though, and a cravat, did he have those?I have only known one person who wore wooden clogs outside of the Netherlands, so deep points for that.
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@benroyce @wendinoakland @overholt
It sounds like these kids are smarter than they let on. They're taking their dad for a ride. -
@ApostateEnglishman
Paisley printed shirts though, and a cravat, did he have those?I have only known one person who wore wooden clogs outside of the Netherlands, so deep points for that.
@mloxton @benroyce @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt Funnily enough, I have a paisley printed shirt! Gold paisley pattern on black cotton! They became briefly, ironically fashionable again for a while over here, but I don't have quite enough faith in my aging brain's ability to keep track of current trends to wear it with a straight face today.
I used to enjoy wearing shirts that made people go, "interesting shirt. Do you...need me to call anyone?".
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@mloxton @benroyce @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt Funnily enough, I have a paisley printed shirt! Gold paisley pattern on black cotton! They became briefly, ironically fashionable again for a while over here, but I don't have quite enough faith in my aging brain's ability to keep track of current trends to wear it with a straight face today.
I used to enjoy wearing shirts that made people go, "interesting shirt. Do you...need me to call anyone?".
@ApostateEnglishman
Did you have the colorful cuff bands at the bottom of your bells to help slow fraying, and the triangular gusset up the side to give them extra flair so you tripped if you walked too fast? -
@mloxton @benroyce @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt Funnily enough, I have a paisley printed shirt! Gold paisley pattern on black cotton! They became briefly, ironically fashionable again for a while over here, but I don't have quite enough faith in my aging brain's ability to keep track of current trends to wear it with a straight face today.
I used to enjoy wearing shirts that made people go, "interesting shirt. Do you...need me to call anyone?".
@ApostateEnglishman @mloxton @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt
i am eternally weirded out by teenagers and young adults wearing "misfits" t shirts
are they musicologists? or are they just "cool t shirt bro"?
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@ApostateEnglishman @mloxton @MissConstrue @TheBreadmonkey @overholt
i am eternally weirded out by teenagers and young adults wearing "misfits" t shirts
are they musicologists? or are they just "cool t shirt bro"?
@benroyce
100% "Cool T Bro" -
time collapses for them. anything "before" happening within the timeframe of their parents age just makes sense to them, because they view their parents as ancient and omnipotent at their young age. it's strangely endearing
@benroyce @401matthall @overholt
I remember my kids referring to a request for help with homework as "seeking the wisdom of the ancients", or even "asking the ancestors" if they were feeling particularly scamp-like. They're teenagers now, so they only consider us ancient, not wise.
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@benroyce @401matthall @overholt
I remember my kids referring to a request for help with homework as "seeking the wisdom of the ancients", or even "asking the ancestors" if they were feeling particularly scamp-like. They're teenagers now, so they only consider us ancient, not wise.
The arc of parental wisdom is fun.
"You must know everything!"
...
"You don't know anything!"
...
"So... You were totally right about my taxes."
