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  3. Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray.

Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray.

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  • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

    Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray. It does one thing and only one thing, and that is turning people into trees. Anyone at all you fire it at? Instantly a tree. A nice, healthy, lush tree with a sturdy root system, multiple symbiotic species in, on and around it, just doing its tree best. Probably attracting a bunch of birds, too.

    ...How careful are you to tree people up?

    allysseriordan@mastodon.artA This user is from outside of this forum
    allysseriordan@mastodon.artA This user is from outside of this forum
    allysseriordan@mastodon.art
    wrote last edited by
    #4

    @sinituulia I'd like to think I'd be considerate and weight carefully who I would tree, but I'm sure I would just get overtaken by tree love and turn everyone I find mildly annoying into a tree. My life would be much improved, and much greener!

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

      Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray. It does one thing and only one thing, and that is turning people into trees. Anyone at all you fire it at? Instantly a tree. A nice, healthy, lush tree with a sturdy root system, multiple symbiotic species in, on and around it, just doing its tree best. Probably attracting a bunch of birds, too.

      ...How careful are you to tree people up?

      afewbugs@social.coopA This user is from outside of this forum
      afewbugs@social.coopA This user is from outside of this forum
      afewbugs@social.coop
      wrote last edited by
      #5

      @sinituulia do you have to be able to see the people in person, or would it work through the internet or a TV, say? Asking for several world leaders

      sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

        Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray. It does one thing and only one thing, and that is turning people into trees. Anyone at all you fire it at? Instantly a tree. A nice, healthy, lush tree with a sturdy root system, multiple symbiotic species in, on and around it, just doing its tree best. Probably attracting a bunch of birds, too.

        ...How careful are you to tree people up?

        weirdofhermiston@toot.catW This user is from outside of this forum
        weirdofhermiston@toot.catW This user is from outside of this forum
        weirdofhermiston@toot.cat
        wrote last edited by
        #6

        @sinituulia especially if I get to choose the type of tree (from native ones for the area, carefully considered, etc.) I am happy to provide more trees and fewer people!

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

          Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray. It does one thing and only one thing, and that is turning people into trees. Anyone at all you fire it at? Instantly a tree. A nice, healthy, lush tree with a sturdy root system, multiple symbiotic species in, on and around it, just doing its tree best. Probably attracting a bunch of birds, too.

          ...How careful are you to tree people up?

          lnr@sunny.gardenL This user is from outside of this forum
          lnr@sunny.gardenL This user is from outside of this forum
          lnr@sunny.garden
          wrote last edited by
          #7

          @sinituulia If I were genuinely convinced that someone would honestly be happier being a tree (and that's a pretty high bar) then I would use it. But otherwise: not even on absolute bastards like Trump.

          Terminal illness, already said goodbye to all your family and friends, made a will, ready to go? Sure, you can be a tree!

          sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • lnr@sunny.gardenL lnr@sunny.garden

            @sinituulia If I were genuinely convinced that someone would honestly be happier being a tree (and that's a pretty high bar) then I would use it. But otherwise: not even on absolute bastards like Trump.

            Terminal illness, already said goodbye to all your family and friends, made a will, ready to go? Sure, you can be a tree!

            sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS This user is from outside of this forum
            sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS This user is from outside of this forum
            sinituulia@eldritch.cafe
            wrote last edited by
            #8

            @lnr That's a more ethical stance than mine, for sure! If someone is causing untold damage to all of humanity, a bunch of nature and probably the entire planet just via being evil? Sorry, no, your human privileges are now revoked! You get to live in a way that causes no one else any harm!

            lnr@sunny.gardenL 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • afewbugs@social.coopA afewbugs@social.coop

              @sinituulia do you have to be able to see the people in person, or would it work through the internet or a TV, say? Asking for several world leaders

              sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS This user is from outside of this forum
              sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS This user is from outside of this forum
              sinituulia@eldritch.cafe
              wrote last edited by
              #9

              @afewbugs I figure as long as it would be completely clear who you're locked on, even remotely would work?

              afewbugs@social.coopA ginevracat@toot.communityG river@takohs.ccR oiskae@mastodon.socialO 4 Replies Last reply
              0
              • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

                @afewbugs I figure as long as it would be completely clear who you're locked on, even remotely would work?

                afewbugs@social.coopA This user is from outside of this forum
                afewbugs@social.coopA This user is from outside of this forum
                afewbugs@social.coop
                wrote last edited by
                #10

                @sinituulia Eeeeeexcellent. *rubs hands together, prepares to bring the forest*

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

                  Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray. It does one thing and only one thing, and that is turning people into trees. Anyone at all you fire it at? Instantly a tree. A nice, healthy, lush tree with a sturdy root system, multiple symbiotic species in, on and around it, just doing its tree best. Probably attracting a bunch of birds, too.

                  ...How careful are you to tree people up?

                  naturemc@mastodon.onlineN This user is from outside of this forum
                  naturemc@mastodon.onlineN This user is from outside of this forum
                  naturemc@mastodon.online
                  wrote last edited by
                  #11

                  @sinituulia May I please tree up myself, too?!

                  BTW, reminds me of the intelligent and wise alien tree civilisation in Dr Who!

                  sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • naturemc@mastodon.onlineN naturemc@mastodon.online

                    @sinituulia May I please tree up myself, too?!

                    BTW, reminds me of the intelligent and wise alien tree civilisation in Dr Who!

                    sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS This user is from outside of this forum
                    sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS This user is from outside of this forum
                    sinituulia@eldritch.cafe
                    wrote last edited by
                    #12

                    @NatureMC I'm sure it could be managed with the help of a mirror, there's probably a fail safe or two to prevent you from accidentally catching yourself on the toe or something with it

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

                      @afewbugs I figure as long as it would be completely clear who you're locked on, even remotely would work?

                      ginevracat@toot.communityG This user is from outside of this forum
                      ginevracat@toot.communityG This user is from outside of this forum
                      ginevracat@toot.community
                      wrote last edited by
                      #13

                      @sinituulia @afewbugs OK. I will still carefully consider each use, but I'm up to about 5 people I know personally and a few I only know from TV.

                      They will all be beautiful trees, and probably happier too.

                      ginevracat@toot.communityG 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

                        Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray. It does one thing and only one thing, and that is turning people into trees. Anyone at all you fire it at? Instantly a tree. A nice, healthy, lush tree with a sturdy root system, multiple symbiotic species in, on and around it, just doing its tree best. Probably attracting a bunch of birds, too.

                        ...How careful are you to tree people up?

                        stepheneb@ruby.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                        stepheneb@ruby.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                        stepheneb@ruby.social
                        wrote last edited by
                        #14

                        @sinituulia

                        I think it might be a wonderful option to have if I or someone i loved was in hospice care!

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • ginevracat@toot.communityG ginevracat@toot.community

                          @sinituulia @afewbugs OK. I will still carefully consider each use, but I'm up to about 5 people I know personally and a few I only know from TV.

                          They will all be beautiful trees, and probably happier too.

                          ginevracat@toot.communityG This user is from outside of this forum
                          ginevracat@toot.communityG This user is from outside of this forum
                          ginevracat@toot.community
                          wrote last edited by
                          #15

                          @sinituulia @afewbugs Ok, that was an off the top of my head response. The more time I have to think about this, the more I find. I may need to make a list.....

                          afewbugs@social.coopA 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • ginevracat@toot.communityG ginevracat@toot.community

                            @sinituulia @afewbugs Ok, that was an off the top of my head response. The more time I have to think about this, the more I find. I may need to make a list.....

                            afewbugs@social.coopA This user is from outside of this forum
                            afewbugs@social.coopA This user is from outside of this forum
                            afewbugs@social.coop
                            wrote last edited by
                            #16

                            @GinevraCat @sinituulia I reckon I could make a pretty decent start on defusing the current Middle East crisis for starters

                            ginevracat@toot.communityG 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • afewbugs@social.coopA afewbugs@social.coop

                              @GinevraCat @sinituulia I reckon I could make a pretty decent start on defusing the current Middle East crisis for starters

                              ginevracat@toot.communityG This user is from outside of this forum
                              ginevracat@toot.communityG This user is from outside of this forum
                              ginevracat@toot.community
                              wrote last edited by
                              #17

                              @afewbugs @sinituulia Right!?!

                              leahbobet@mstdn.caL 1 Reply Last reply
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                              • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

                                Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray. It does one thing and only one thing, and that is turning people into trees. Anyone at all you fire it at? Instantly a tree. A nice, healthy, lush tree with a sturdy root system, multiple symbiotic species in, on and around it, just doing its tree best. Probably attracting a bunch of birds, too.

                                ...How careful are you to tree people up?

                                leahbobet@mstdn.caL This user is from outside of this forum
                                leahbobet@mstdn.caL This user is from outside of this forum
                                leahbobet@mstdn.ca
                                wrote last edited by
                                #18

                                @sinituulia Bless you and thank you for finding a prosocial version of the "How many bullets?" game. 🌴

                                sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • ginevracat@toot.communityG ginevracat@toot.community

                                  @afewbugs @sinituulia Right!?!

                                  leahbobet@mstdn.caL This user is from outside of this forum
                                  leahbobet@mstdn.caL This user is from outside of this forum
                                  leahbobet@mstdn.ca
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #19

                                  @GinevraCat @afewbugs @sinituulia I have this theory that more problems than we think are caused by much fewer people than we fear and I am ready to test it with reforestation.

                                  (ETA: Sorry, I also on reflection feel like I should say that yup, I'm aware how close that treads to some very real ethical lines and have no plans on going full ecofascist. Just: real frustrated and scared this week. Carry on.)

                                  ginevracat@toot.communityG 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

                                    @lnr That's a more ethical stance than mine, for sure! If someone is causing untold damage to all of humanity, a bunch of nature and probably the entire planet just via being evil? Sorry, no, your human privileges are now revoked! You get to live in a way that causes no one else any harm!

                                    lnr@sunny.gardenL This user is from outside of this forum
                                    lnr@sunny.gardenL This user is from outside of this forum
                                    lnr@sunny.garden
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #20

                                    @sinituulia It's honestly very very tempting. But I don't think I could face the responsibility of getting it wrong. Or their loved ones being mad at me.

                                    lnr@sunny.gardenL 1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

                                      Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray. It does one thing and only one thing, and that is turning people into trees. Anyone at all you fire it at? Instantly a tree. A nice, healthy, lush tree with a sturdy root system, multiple symbiotic species in, on and around it, just doing its tree best. Probably attracting a bunch of birds, too.

                                      ...How careful are you to tree people up?

                                      lolicanthe@eldritch.cafeL This user is from outside of this forum
                                      lolicanthe@eldritch.cafeL This user is from outside of this forum
                                      lolicanthe@eldritch.cafe
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #21

                                      @sinituulia not everybody deserves to be a tree tho...

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • sinituulia@eldritch.cafeS sinituulia@eldritch.cafe

                                        Quietly in the night, you are handed the Tree Ray. It does one thing and only one thing, and that is turning people into trees. Anyone at all you fire it at? Instantly a tree. A nice, healthy, lush tree with a sturdy root system, multiple symbiotic species in, on and around it, just doing its tree best. Probably attracting a bunch of birds, too.

                                        ...How careful are you to tree people up?

                                        mees@sunny.gardenM This user is from outside of this forum
                                        mees@sunny.gardenM This user is from outside of this forum
                                        mees@sunny.garden
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #22

                                        @sinituulia me. Being a tree sounds amazing, really. No taxes, no joints. I'm totally in. I'd ask around if others want in, too, but I'm definitely treeing myself.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • lnr@sunny.gardenL lnr@sunny.garden

                                          @sinituulia It's honestly very very tempting. But I don't think I could face the responsibility of getting it wrong. Or their loved ones being mad at me.

                                          lnr@sunny.gardenL This user is from outside of this forum
                                          lnr@sunny.gardenL This user is from outside of this forum
                                          lnr@sunny.garden
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #23

                                          @sinituulia on which note: terminally ill and would actually rather stay alive as a person but just can't afford proper care: fund proper care! (I wish I could make this happen!)

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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