1Stephen King: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the sleepwalkers King: it's about these cat vampire people Poe: oo!

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

1
Stephen King: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the sleepwalkers
King: it's about these cat vampire people
Poe: oo! what do they look like?
King: kinda like cats
King: but gross
Poe: i don't understand

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

2
Poe: i don't understand steve
Poe: how could you make a cat
Poe: the most beautiful of all animals
Poe: look gross?
Lovecraft: do they look like
Poe: HOWARD
Poe: BE QUIET
Lovecraft: i was only going to say
Poe: we all know what you were going to say
Lovecraft:
Lovecraft: i never get to say anything

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

3
King: well, it's simple edgar
King: just imagine that they're all bald and wrinkly
Poe: you're just describing a sphinx cat, steve
Poe: and all sphinxes are queens
King: no no no
King: not like a sphinx cat
King: more like a big naked mole rat
King: or perhaps
King: a naked mole
King: CAT

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

4
Lovecraft: you know, steve, i have to say
Lovecraft: i really don't like how anti-cat this story is!
Lovecraft: it's kind of cat-phobic
Lovecraft: and if there's one thing i can't abide, it's prejudice
King:
Koontz:
Barker:
Poe:
Lovecraft: against cats

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

5
Barker: christ are you lot on about cats again
Poe: cats are good, clive
Barker: yeah yeah i know that's all you all talk about anymore
Barker: it's enough to make a guy crazy! fuckin' cats!
King: do you want a cameo in my story or not
Barker:
Barker: yeah i want a cameo

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

6
King: here's the thing about these vampire cats tho
King: real cats hate them
King: like, cat bites are fatal to them and cats hate them and always try to attack them and kill them
Barker: how does that follow thematically
King: well, because
King:
King: because i didn't want the cats to be bad okay

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

7
Barker: you didn't want the cats to be bad
King: no! i love cats!
King: would any man who didn't love cats create such a thematically convoluted work simply for the purpose of exonerating cats?
Barker:
King: also the cop in this story has a police cat
Barker: what

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

8
Barker: what?!
Barker: how does that make sense
King: it's just like a police dog, but a cat
Barker: no seriously
Barker: what does a police cat do
King: you know
King: police cat work
Barker:
Poe: clive, let steve have his police cat
George Romero: ACAB includes clovis

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

9
Koontz: guys! guys! look at that!
Koontz: a sleigh just pulled up outside, drawn by eight cats!
King: a cat drawn sleigh?? why, it can only be....
Andre Norton: hello everyone, it's me andre norton
Norton: editor of CATFANTASTIQUE!

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

10
Andre Norton: every year, i descend from the hallowed halls of CATFANTASTIQUE to choose one special person who loves cats so much that they deserve to join us in CATFANTASTIQUE
Norton: stephen king
Lovecraft: no
Norton: stephen king would you do us the honor
Lovecraft: NO!

[bitterkarella@sfba.social]

11
Andre Norton: we've heard about your story cat's paw, steve
Norton: and we'd like to invite you to join us in the hallowed realm of CATFANTASTIQUE
Dean Koontz: wow! is there a dogfantastic too?
Norton:
Norton: i wouldn't know about that

[log@mastodon.sdf.org]

@bitterkarella Real cats do be freaking out over humans in cat masks, though. It was a video trend for about 15 minutes a while back. Like the cucumber thing.

[terribletowelie@mastodon.social]

@log @bitterkarella