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CIRCLE WITH A DOT

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  3. Non-binary people do not owe you androgyny.

Non-binary people do not owe you androgyny.

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  • bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB bathyspherehat@mastodon.online

    @Nausipoule @babe People absolutely do owe them basic respect, which means making an effort to gender them correctly. Also, speaking from experience, there is no gender presentation that will make people gender nonbinary people correctly by default, especially if we use gender neutral pronouns. There's no "looking nonbinary" in the sense that people will see you and go "Ah yes, they/them", which is one of the reasons it's so important to ask (or check bios online).

    bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
    bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
    bathyspherehat@mastodon.online
    wrote last edited by
    #22

    @Nausipoule @babe Even if such a presentation existed, it wouldn't be accessible to all nonbinary people, because we can't fully control how we look. And even if we could, it's possible and completely ok to be nonbinary and not want to look completely androgynous.

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • neckspike@indiepocalypse.socialN This user is from outside of this forum
      neckspike@indiepocalypse.socialN This user is from outside of this forum
      neckspike@indiepocalypse.social
      wrote last edited by
      #23

      @Nausipoule @babe Did you know? Keeping your transphobic thoughts to yourself is free.

      1 Reply Last reply
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      • bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
        bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
        bathyspherehat@mastodon.online
        wrote last edited by
        #24

        @Nausipoule @babe You're doing lateral transphobia, though. Being trans doesn't absolve you of exorsexism. But ok, nonbinary doesn't exist in our (mainstream) culture, making passing as nonbinary impossible. How is that "on us"? Nonbinary people don't choose the cultures we're born into.

        bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB 1 Reply Last reply
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        • bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB bathyspherehat@mastodon.online

          @Nausipoule @babe You're doing lateral transphobia, though. Being trans doesn't absolve you of exorsexism. But ok, nonbinary doesn't exist in our (mainstream) culture, making passing as nonbinary impossible. How is that "on us"? Nonbinary people don't choose the cultures we're born into.

          bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
          bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
          bathyspherehat@mastodon.online
          wrote last edited by
          #25

          @Nausipoule Also, I'd like to point out that @babe has their pronouns in their bio. They're signaling how you should refer to them about as clearly as they can, unless you expect them to make it their display name.

          sng@bsd.networkS 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
            bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
            bathyspherehat@mastodon.online
            wrote last edited by
            #26

            @Nausipoule Are you, a trans girl, pretending that you don't know what the word "transphobia" means?

            1 Reply Last reply
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            • babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB babe@glitterkitten.co.uk

              And if you come at me with shit like "but I see you as..." you'll very quickly not be seeing me at all.

              cloudthethings@hachyderm.ioC This user is from outside of this forum
              cloudthethings@hachyderm.ioC This user is from outside of this forum
              cloudthethings@hachyderm.io
              wrote last edited by
              #27

              @babe I see you as an infosec blogger and lawyer

              1 Reply Last reply
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              • bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB bathyspherehat@mastodon.online

                @Nausipoule Also, I'd like to point out that @babe has their pronouns in their bio. They're signaling how you should refer to them about as clearly as they can, unless you expect them to make it their display name.

                sng@bsd.networkS This user is from outside of this forum
                sng@bsd.networkS This user is from outside of this forum
                sng@bsd.network
                wrote last edited by
                #28

                @babe @BathysphereHat I’m just here to instantly smack follow on anybody who uses “Rabbit Cohen” cause that’s peak Jewish humor.

                bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB 1 Reply Last reply
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                • bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                  bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                  bathyspherehat@mastodon.online
                  wrote last edited by
                  #29

                  @Nausipoule Again, how do you pass as nonbinary?

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • sng@bsd.networkS sng@bsd.network

                    @babe @BathysphereHat I’m just here to instantly smack follow on anybody who uses “Rabbit Cohen” cause that’s peak Jewish humor.

                    bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                    bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                    bathyspherehat@mastodon.online
                    wrote last edited by
                    #30

                    @sng @babe Oh, it's also my actual name! But thank you, haha.

                    sng@bsd.networkS 1 Reply Last reply
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                    • bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                      bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                      bathyspherehat@mastodon.online
                      wrote last edited by
                      #31

                      @Nausipoule Ohh, so you're a radfem. Got it. Cool. Cool cool cool.

                      1 Reply Last reply
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                      • bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB bathyspherehat@mastodon.online

                        @sng @babe Oh, it's also my actual name! But thank you, haha.

                        sng@bsd.networkS This user is from outside of this forum
                        sng@bsd.networkS This user is from outside of this forum
                        sng@bsd.network
                        wrote last edited by
                        #32

                        @babe @BathysphereHat In that case it is possibly the coolest name ever.

                        bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • sng@bsd.networkS sng@bsd.network

                          @babe @BathysphereHat In that case it is possibly the coolest name ever.

                          bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                          bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                          bathyspherehat@mastodon.online
                          wrote last edited by
                          #33

                          @sng @babe Thanks! 😄

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • jason@logoff.websiteJ This user is from outside of this forum
                            jason@logoff.websiteJ This user is from outside of this forum
                            jason@logoff.website
                            wrote last edited by
                            #34

                            @Nausipoule @babe this is bot-level flamebait. Just devoid of mind. Imagine being like this and not doing anything about it (ideally the this but maybe the being).

                            1 Reply Last reply
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                            • babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB babe@glitterkitten.co.uk

                              I don't give a shit how much it confuses people that my aesthetic is feminine, it doesn't in any way invalidate my internal sense about who and what I am.

                              jason@logoff.websiteJ This user is from outside of this forum
                              jason@logoff.websiteJ This user is from outside of this forum
                              jason@logoff.website
                              wrote last edited by
                              #35

                              @babe the replies to this by that one person are fucking wild, what the fuck. This doesn’t seem particularly controversial but 🤷

                              babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB 1 Reply Last reply
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                              • jason@logoff.websiteJ jason@logoff.website

                                @babe the replies to this by that one person are fucking wild, what the fuck. This doesn’t seem particularly controversial but 🤷

                                babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB This user is from outside of this forum
                                babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB This user is from outside of this forum
                                babe@glitterkitten.co.uk
                                wrote last edited by
                                #36

                                @jason Honestly it's not anything I haven't heard a thousand times.
                                Any post about being non-binary taking off is bound to catch the odd rad fem theory. Credit to @BathysphereHat for countering it so calmly, I'd have just said fuck off

                                bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB 1 Reply Last reply
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                                • babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB babe@glitterkitten.co.uk

                                  @jason Honestly it's not anything I haven't heard a thousand times.
                                  Any post about being non-binary taking off is bound to catch the odd rad fem theory. Credit to @BathysphereHat for countering it so calmly, I'd have just said fuck off

                                  bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                                  bathyspherehat@mastodon.onlineB This user is from outside of this forum
                                  bathyspherehat@mastodon.online
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #37

                                  @babe @jason Thank you! I did eventually block her because she started talking like a villain from a JRPG where you fight radfems.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB babe@glitterkitten.co.uk

                                    I don't give a shit how much it confuses people that my aesthetic is feminine, it doesn't in any way invalidate my internal sense about who and what I am.

                                    catmisgivings@stranger.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                                    catmisgivings@stranger.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                                    catmisgivings@stranger.social
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #38

                                    @babe heck yes sing it

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB babe@glitterkitten.co.uk

                                      I don't give a shit how much it confuses people that my aesthetic is feminine, it doesn't in any way invalidate my internal sense about who and what I am.

                                      ballista11@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                      ballista11@mastodon.socialB This user is from outside of this forum
                                      ballista11@mastodon.social
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #39

                                      @babe
                                      Not that it matters.... Ricky Gervais self identifies as a comedian. AND Nigel Farage self identifies as a human.
                                      If you identify as a woman then I can believe and validate that.
                                      Farage on the other hand??? Seriously, is he even an organism? I can't imagine anything alive willingly associating with the warm, orange lump in the underwear of life.

                                      babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB 1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB babe@glitterkitten.co.uk

                                        Non-binary people do not owe you androgyny.

                                        empyclaw@mastodon.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
                                        empyclaw@mastodon.socialE This user is from outside of this forum
                                        empyclaw@mastodon.social
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #40

                                        @babe A friend sharing this quote with me last year unlocked a lot for me… both in my writing and in seeing myself.

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • ballista11@mastodon.socialB ballista11@mastodon.social

                                          @babe
                                          Not that it matters.... Ricky Gervais self identifies as a comedian. AND Nigel Farage self identifies as a human.
                                          If you identify as a woman then I can believe and validate that.
                                          Farage on the other hand??? Seriously, is he even an organism? I can't imagine anything alive willingly associating with the warm, orange lump in the underwear of life.

                                          babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          babe@glitterkitten.co.ukB This user is from outside of this forum
                                          babe@glitterkitten.co.uk
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #41

                                          @ballista11 non binary, not a woman

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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