MY FRIEND: So what have you been up to lately?

[jalefkowit@vmst.io]

MY FRIEND: So what have you been up to lately?

ME [ face smeared with chocolate ]: ... nothing

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2026/03/28/kitkat-bar-theft/89365477007/

[tock@corteximplant.com]

@jalefkowit Doctor: "Of course you have malnutrition, you ate nothing but chocolate candy bars for three weeks straight!"
Shivering gastronomy patient/thief: "...worth it."

[shiitaketoast@beige.party]

@jalefkowit

[paul_ipv6@infosec.exchange]

@jalefkowit

"what's that in your mouth?"

"*nuffum*... <gulp>"

[nf3xn@mastodon.social]

@jalefkowit Is it really stealing if they literally said 'Take a KitKat'.

[kayo77@infosec.exchange]

@jalefkowit
have a break
have a KitKat

[feld@friedcheese.us]

@jalefkowit I think I know who is responsible

[darth_hideout@mas.to]

@jalefkowit "Its new chocolate range"?

[scottley@infosec.exchange]

@jalefkowit you are the KitKat burglar!