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  3. I hope John Roberts can't watch the NFL playoff games today because he has explosive diarrhea.

I hope John Roberts can't watch the NFL playoff games today because he has explosive diarrhea.

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  • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

    I hope John Roberts needs to call the Mexican embassy for some information about a travel visa for a future vacation and the automated system says for instructions in English press 2 and he presses 2 because he doesn't speak Spanish and then the voice continues in Spanish but with a British accent.

    (Reference: https://apnews.com/article/washington-dol-spanish-accent-ai-3a1b8438a5674c07242a8d48c057d5a3 )

    alexmdunne@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
    alexmdunne@mastodon.socialA This user is from outside of this forum
    alexmdunne@mastodon.social
    wrote last edited by
    #89

    @msbellows

    Related question: Why don't all automated voice-response systems have a "Basil Fawlty mode"?

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

      I hope John Roberts needs to call the Mexican embassy for some information about a travel visa for a future vacation and the automated system says for instructions in English press 2 and he presses 2 because he doesn't speak Spanish and then the voice continues in Spanish but with a British accent.

      (Reference: https://apnews.com/article/washington-dol-spanish-accent-ai-3a1b8438a5674c07242a8d48c057d5a3 )

      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
      msbellows@c.im
      wrote last edited by
      #90

      I hope John Roberts goes out for Middle Eastern food tonight and his waiter secretly spits in his hummus.

      msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

        I hope John Roberts goes out for Middle Eastern food tonight and his waiter secretly spits in his hummus.

        msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
        msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
        msbellows@c.im
        wrote last edited by
        #91

        I hope John Roberts' knee hurts really badly for no obvious reason so he limps everywhere he walks today and he has no idea why but damn it *really* hurts.

        catawu@mastodon.socialC msbellows@c.imM 2 Replies Last reply
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        • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

          I hope John Roberts' knee hurts really badly for no obvious reason so he limps everywhere he walks today and he has no idea why but damn it *really* hurts.

          catawu@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
          catawu@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
          catawu@mastodon.social
          wrote last edited by
          #92

          @msbellows He shoulda worn kneepads all those times he knelt before f47.

          1 Reply Last reply
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          • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

            I hope John Roberts' knee hurts really badly for no obvious reason so he limps everywhere he walks today and he has no idea why but damn it *really* hurts.

            msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
            msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
            msbellows@c.im
            wrote last edited by
            #93

            I hope John Roberts throws up a little in his mouth today.

            qurlyjoe@mstdn.socialQ msbellows@c.imM 2 Replies Last reply
            0
            • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

              I hope John Roberts lost track of the days over the weekend and fell asleep last night thinking it was still Saturday and slept in this morning and was relaxing in his easy chair with a cup of coffee when the phone rang with a frantic clerk wondering where the hell he was.

              flashmobofone@mstdn.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
              flashmobofone@mstdn.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
              flashmobofone@mstdn.social
              wrote last edited by
              #94

              @msbellows I hope he has some non-fatal but exceedingly discomfiting and painful medical problem.

              msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • flashmobofone@mstdn.socialF flashmobofone@mstdn.social

                @msbellows I hope he has some non-fatal but exceedingly discomfiting and painful medical problem.

                msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                msbellows@c.im
                wrote last edited by
                #95

                @FlashMobOfOne Read upthread. Keyword: "hemorrhoid."

                1 Reply Last reply
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                • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                  I hope John Roberts throws up a little in his mouth today.

                  qurlyjoe@mstdn.socialQ This user is from outside of this forum
                  qurlyjoe@mstdn.socialQ This user is from outside of this forum
                  qurlyjoe@mstdn.social
                  wrote last edited by
                  #96

                  @msbellows
                  I hope he fucking chokes on it and dies, tbh.

                  msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • qurlyjoe@mstdn.socialQ qurlyjoe@mstdn.social

                    @msbellows
                    I hope he fucking chokes on it and dies, tbh.

                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                    msbellows@c.im
                    wrote last edited by
                    #97

                    @qurlyjoe I work hard to not wish that, because I don't want a Chief Justice Eileen Cannon for the rest of my life.

                    qurlyjoe@mstdn.socialQ 1 Reply Last reply
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                    • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                      I hope John Roberts throws up a little in his mouth today.

                      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                      msbellows@c.im
                      wrote last edited by
                      #98

                      (Digression: obscene decisions like this are why, in this thread, I'm making it a practice to curse U.S. Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts every single day: https://apnews.com/article/supreme-court-transgender-students-california-cca311ae39d267f31c1392a0bcf780cd

                      I've been a lawyer for nearly four decades. I've been PROUD to be a lawyer! On the day I graduated from law school I was privileged to shake hands with our commencement speaker, the outstanding liberal justice William F. Brennan. Lawyers and jurists like Brennan have been responsible for much of the social progress America slowly made through most of the 20th century, and I foolishly thought that that progress would mostly continue.

                      John Roberts represents the betrayal of that proud tradition. More broadly, John Roberts represents everything that is wrong with privilege and whiteness and toxic maleness and greed. So yes, I curse John Roberts, in small ways and large, every single fucking day. Because he has betrayed a noble calling, and the instant there's someone in the Oval Office who won't make Eileen Cannon chief justice, my final curse will be a general, passive wish for John Roberts to die painfully and slowly (but not too slowly).

                      But until then I curse him creatively, trying to bring a little humor to my rage.)

                      ai6yr@m.ai6yr.orgA msbellows@c.imM 2 Replies Last reply
                      0
                      • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                        (Digression: obscene decisions like this are why, in this thread, I'm making it a practice to curse U.S. Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts every single day: https://apnews.com/article/supreme-court-transgender-students-california-cca311ae39d267f31c1392a0bcf780cd

                        I've been a lawyer for nearly four decades. I've been PROUD to be a lawyer! On the day I graduated from law school I was privileged to shake hands with our commencement speaker, the outstanding liberal justice William F. Brennan. Lawyers and jurists like Brennan have been responsible for much of the social progress America slowly made through most of the 20th century, and I foolishly thought that that progress would mostly continue.

                        John Roberts represents the betrayal of that proud tradition. More broadly, John Roberts represents everything that is wrong with privilege and whiteness and toxic maleness and greed. So yes, I curse John Roberts, in small ways and large, every single fucking day. Because he has betrayed a noble calling, and the instant there's someone in the Oval Office who won't make Eileen Cannon chief justice, my final curse will be a general, passive wish for John Roberts to die painfully and slowly (but not too slowly).

                        But until then I curse him creatively, trying to bring a little humor to my rage.)

                        ai6yr@m.ai6yr.orgA This user is from outside of this forum
                        ai6yr@m.ai6yr.orgA This user is from outside of this forum
                        ai6yr@m.ai6yr.org
                        wrote last edited by
                        #99

                        @msbellows ***non lawyer makes notes on what is acceptable to wish upon those you despise, but which will avoid a libel lawsuit or visit from someone with a badge and gun 🤪

                        msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                          @qurlyjoe I work hard to not wish that, because I don't want a Chief Justice Eileen Cannon for the rest of my life.

                          qurlyjoe@mstdn.socialQ This user is from outside of this forum
                          qurlyjoe@mstdn.socialQ This user is from outside of this forum
                          qurlyjoe@mstdn.social
                          wrote last edited by
                          #100

                          @msbellows
                          Fair point. I tend to be swayed by the shortness of my expected future I guess, and really should have more regard for those that will have to endure the consequences of my short term wishes. My bad.

                          msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • ai6yr@m.ai6yr.orgA ai6yr@m.ai6yr.org

                            @msbellows ***non lawyer makes notes on what is acceptable to wish upon those you despise, but which will avoid a libel lawsuit or visit from someone with a badge and gun 🤪

                            msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                            msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                            msbellows@c.im
                            wrote last edited by
                            #101

                            @ai6yr My last post probably went too far, then.

                            icooiey@mastodon.greenI 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • qurlyjoe@mstdn.socialQ qurlyjoe@mstdn.social

                              @msbellows
                              Fair point. I tend to be swayed by the shortness of my expected future I guess, and really should have more regard for those that will have to endure the consequences of my short term wishes. My bad.

                              msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                              msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                              msbellows@c.im
                              wrote last edited by
                              #102

                              @qurlyjoe Not your bad! All is copacetic!

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                @ai6yr My last post probably went too far, then.

                                icooiey@mastodon.greenI This user is from outside of this forum
                                icooiey@mastodon.greenI This user is from outside of this forum
                                icooiey@mastodon.green
                                wrote last edited by
                                #103

                                @msbellows @ai6yr have just stumbled on this thread and fully endorse.

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • leslieburns@esq.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                                  leslieburns@esq.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                                  leslieburns@esq.social
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #104

                                  @msbellows Consider this my amicus to your toot, because I am with you, brother attorney.

                                  msbellows@c.imM 1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • leslieburns@esq.socialL leslieburns@esq.social

                                    @msbellows Consider this my amicus to your toot, because I am with you, brother attorney.

                                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    msbellows@c.im
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #105

                                    @LeslieBurns And brother bad Buddhist. Don't forget that! ✊⚖️🪷

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                      (Digression: obscene decisions like this are why, in this thread, I'm making it a practice to curse U.S. Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts every single day: https://apnews.com/article/supreme-court-transgender-students-california-cca311ae39d267f31c1392a0bcf780cd

                                      I've been a lawyer for nearly four decades. I've been PROUD to be a lawyer! On the day I graduated from law school I was privileged to shake hands with our commencement speaker, the outstanding liberal justice William F. Brennan. Lawyers and jurists like Brennan have been responsible for much of the social progress America slowly made through most of the 20th century, and I foolishly thought that that progress would mostly continue.

                                      John Roberts represents the betrayal of that proud tradition. More broadly, John Roberts represents everything that is wrong with privilege and whiteness and toxic maleness and greed. So yes, I curse John Roberts, in small ways and large, every single fucking day. Because he has betrayed a noble calling, and the instant there's someone in the Oval Office who won't make Eileen Cannon chief justice, my final curse will be a general, passive wish for John Roberts to die painfully and slowly (but not too slowly).

                                      But until then I curse him creatively, trying to bring a little humor to my rage.)

                                      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                      msbellows@c.imM This user is from outside of this forum
                                      msbellows@c.im
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #106

                                      I hope John Roberts has an annoying blob of earwax in one ear and goes to the hall closet for a q-tip but the Costco-sized box they've had literally for years is completely empty and that ear is really bugging him so instead he halfway unbends a small paperclip and uses the smaller loop to dig out the dried wax and he tries to be careful but the paperclip was dirty or he scratches something and anyway he develops a really nasty ear infection that makes him dizzy and gives him headaches and tinnitus.

                                      mralancooper@hachyderm.ioM aarondavid@c.imA msbellows@c.imM 3 Replies Last reply
                                      0
                                      • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                        I hope John Roberts has an annoying blob of earwax in one ear and goes to the hall closet for a q-tip but the Costco-sized box they've had literally for years is completely empty and that ear is really bugging him so instead he halfway unbends a small paperclip and uses the smaller loop to dig out the dried wax and he tries to be careful but the paperclip was dirty or he scratches something and anyway he develops a really nasty ear infection that makes him dizzy and gives him headaches and tinnitus.

                                        mralancooper@hachyderm.ioM This user is from outside of this forum
                                        mralancooper@hachyderm.ioM This user is from outside of this forum
                                        mralancooper@hachyderm.io
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #107

                                        @msbellows LOL

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • msbellows@c.imM msbellows@c.im

                                          I hope John Roberts has an annoying blob of earwax in one ear and goes to the hall closet for a q-tip but the Costco-sized box they've had literally for years is completely empty and that ear is really bugging him so instead he halfway unbends a small paperclip and uses the smaller loop to dig out the dried wax and he tries to be careful but the paperclip was dirty or he scratches something and anyway he develops a really nasty ear infection that makes him dizzy and gives him headaches and tinnitus.

                                          aarondavid@c.imA This user is from outside of this forum
                                          aarondavid@c.imA This user is from outside of this forum
                                          aarondavid@c.im
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #108

                                          @msbellows I hope someone breaks into his house and paints all the lightbulbs black, so when he switches the light on it gets darker and he bumps his shin, causing an unpleasant bruise

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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