- Once I had a love, and it was a gas
-
- Once I had a love, and it was a gas.
Soon turned out had a heart of glass.
Seemed like the real thing, only to find
***Mucho mistrust***, love's gone behind.- If you are sad and eat a can of Lay's sour cream & onion chips every day for weeks (in addition to your usual 'stuffs'), *you will gain weight.* Be warned.
- A therapist will breakup with you if they believe you don't actually need more therapy but need to realize things about other people and how they interact/behave. She said it was her ethical responsibility to be honest with me. More was said but it took me until she was very blunt to digest it all.
[Introvert then introverted for a bit....until you saw me again]
- My son expanded my hydrangea bed.
- Wren sent me 8 dahlia bulbs that are not common here. I bought many pots. There will be dahlias growing everywhere. (Thank you again
)- I took out my aster, as much as I loved them. They were getting 3 feet tall x 2 feet wide and they were only supposed to get to 13" tall (per the lying seller), so big they would split.
- I took out the weigelas in the front that failed to grow upright. Weird. I know. They grew like a flat vine. Maybe symbolic of something...
- Upsetting BIG: My baby floof tore her ACL.🤯 This has been upsetting - I'm not sure which of us is more traumatized but I know which of us is in the most physical pain. My poor baby girl. Ongoing.
️🩹
I will choose surgery if this is what they suggest. Best girl ever. (Need to decide soon.)- Enlightening: Recognized that I, maybe, **too** unconditionally accept people. If I am going to do that, *I need to recognize the potential for it to not be reciprocated and how that might make me feel*. (Spoiler alert: Very, very bad.)
[**But, also, me: Isn't the potential of (my) unconditional love wonderful?!? A part of me says "yes!!!" with at least 3 exclamation points!!!...
Yes. At least 3!!!**]- Got Rickrolled a lot at work, but the woman who took Notebook Lady's role is *fucking delightful*. I mean, the bar was low, but I just find her totally wonderful after what we all dealt with for 3+ very long years. #FuckYouAdrian still manages to fail up, fakes his way through life, and doesn't wear socks with his brown loafers.
- I have all the makings to grow a hydrangea in a big ass pot so I can turn it / keep it blue here in Ohioduhtucky. Wish me luck!
- If my light
️ gets stolen, it is hard for me to recharge. Thank you, Happy Light, Summer Sun, and DST. *And friends who give me grace, know when I am out of character.* - The people of the fedi are *mostly* good people but I probably shouldn't get emotionally invested anymore for risk of my personal well-being. [It's not a you thing in this situation, it's a me thing. I need to figure out what is wrong with my character meter, or me. Thought I had it/me well calibrated over/after many years (of bullshit).]
- I do not choose men who allow themselves to be available to me. I choose men who have problems that I think I can help. I probably do help them, but it sucks life from me when they decide I am not worthy 'enough' anymore. So, it's kinda like my super power is building up insecure men until they are confident enough to leave me.
Deep sigh. Not what I wanted, not at all. #ReasonsIAmSingle (Insert Paul's carousel meme to me that holds iconic value 
)(
Why men great til they gotta be great?)**These are not the underoos that I thought I was wearing.**
Nonetheless, I have underwear that is fun to wear!
️
- I was painfully reminded that not everyone is as authentic as me. [Kids, more bluntly, some people are not who they seem to be. Avoid too many lessons here if you can.]
- Started doing things not typical for me just to FAFO. Meh. I actually think I am a decent human (Yes, that's a hint of self-esteem. Surprise
, motherfuckers!), I don't need to try like this to find my people. If I never find the man "meant for me" then "it is what it is," there is no man meant for me, so be it. And, tbh, that's okay. I am set. I've taken care of myself, my son, the basic needs of my life. I was happy if I dial back a few months.- Almost booked a trip to Texas because last time I was so heart hurt, I ended up drunk in Texas and couldn't find my horse. I learned back then about the custom of putting a raccoon dick in a cowboy hat. [Remember to ask what things are before you touch, kids.]
Texas
- OH BIG! My son started seeing a new girl. Weird how I got so happy for him (vs protective in a fierce way). I hope she's a nice girl. Nursing student. Her family is from a much farther north place so watch me embrace her best I can to make sure my son doesn't want to move to that cold place but rather she wants to stay here. She gonna be my bestie!
- When I'm trying to get myself to feel better, I might send you a silly selfie of myself pretending to be Mermaid Man (from SpongeBob) in the cheapest way. (I'm a big kid. It's a secret.) Also, I'm sorry if you've seen this.
- Will always be true to myself, my principles, my word. Even when the BIG Bish in me wants to to do something else. (I blame my job for this - adulting.) My training, or my inherent need to influence, outweighs the bish in me, but not the brat. I require things.
- This post has also been a challenge to Mat B's lengthy posts 🫶. Missed your wonderful tales, my friend. Hope you stumble into this read and know I have, indeed, thought of you. Hope Daphne is doing well.
- #Goals got my son to react to a gif I sent him after we had a complicated exchange in which he spam texted me, (which I never was going to read...squirrel...by the 3rd screenshot of full page text images, I tapped out), so I simply said "Sir, this is a Wendy's" and then he said "bro" to me, so I dropped a gif of Ed from Good Burger.
(I hope he realizes I read none of those 8 or whatever full page text images that he sent me. Hope they weren't important. I'm sure I'll be blamed if there is some kind of consequence for him.)I feel a little awkward, like I shouldn't be here anymore, but as I do, let's FAFO. You in?
I am a poster girl with no poster
I am thirty-two flavors and then some
And I'm beyond your peripheral vision
So you might want to turn your headJust said to a friend "I never want to hide or be ashamed of the things that have made me." And that includes recent events.
Miss me?
️
Missed you.I still, to all our surprise, have >4k characters to spare.
-
- Once I had a love, and it was a gas.
Soon turned out had a heart of glass.
Seemed like the real thing, only to find
***Mucho mistrust***, love's gone behind.- If you are sad and eat a can of Lay's sour cream & onion chips every day for weeks (in addition to your usual 'stuffs'), *you will gain weight.* Be warned.
- A therapist will breakup with you if they believe you don't actually need more therapy but need to realize things about other people and how they interact/behave. She said it was her ethical responsibility to be honest with me. More was said but it took me until she was very blunt to digest it all.
[Introvert then introverted for a bit....until you saw me again]
- My son expanded my hydrangea bed.
- Wren sent me 8 dahlia bulbs that are not common here. I bought many pots. There will be dahlias growing everywhere. (Thank you again
)- I took out my aster, as much as I loved them. They were getting 3 feet tall x 2 feet wide and they were only supposed to get to 13" tall (per the lying seller), so big they would split.
- I took out the weigelas in the front that failed to grow upright. Weird. I know. They grew like a flat vine. Maybe symbolic of something...
- Upsetting BIG: My baby floof tore her ACL.🤯 This has been upsetting - I'm not sure which of us is more traumatized but I know which of us is in the most physical pain. My poor baby girl. Ongoing.
️🩹 I will choose surgery if this is what they suggest. Best girl ever. (Need to decide soon.)- Enlightening: Recognized that I, maybe, **too** unconditionally accept people. If I am going to do that, *I need to recognize the potential for it to not be reciprocated and how that might make me feel*. (Spoiler alert: Very, very bad.)
[**But, also, me: Isn't the potential of (my) unconditional love wonderful?!? A part of me says "yes!!!" with at least 3 exclamation points!!!...
Yes. At least 3!!!**]- Got Rickrolled a lot at work, but the woman who took Notebook Lady's role is *fucking delightful*. I mean, the bar was low, but I just find her totally wonderful after what we all dealt with for 3+ very long years. #FuckYouAdrian still manages to fail up, fakes his way through life, and doesn't wear socks with his brown loafers.
- I have all the makings to grow a hydrangea in a big ass pot so I can turn it / keep it blue here in Ohioduhtucky. Wish me luck!
- If my light
️ gets stolen, it is hard for me to recharge. Thank you, Happy Light, Summer Sun, and DST. *And friends who give me grace, know when I am out of character.* - The people of the fedi are *mostly* good people but I probably shouldn't get emotionally invested anymore for risk of my personal well-being. [It's not a you thing in this situation, it's a me thing. I need to figure out what is wrong with my character meter, or me. Thought I had it/me well calibrated over/after many years (of bullshit).]
- I do not choose men who allow themselves to be available to me. I choose men who have problems that I think I can help. I probably do help them, but it sucks life from me when they decide I am not worthy 'enough' anymore. So, it's kinda like my super power is building up insecure men until they are confident enough to leave me.
Deep sigh. Not what I wanted, not at all. #ReasonsIAmSingle (Insert Paul's carousel meme to me that holds iconic value )(
Why men great til they gotta be great?)**These are not the underoos that I thought I was wearing.**
Nonetheless, I have underwear that is fun to wear!️- I was painfully reminded that not everyone is as authentic as me. [Kids, more bluntly, some people are not who they seem to be. Avoid too many lessons here if you can.]
- Started doing things not typical for me just to FAFO. Meh. I actually think I am a decent human (Yes, that's a hint of self-esteem. Surprise
, motherfuckers!), I don't need to try like this to find my people. If I never find the man "meant for me" then "it is what it is," there is no man meant for me, so be it. And, tbh, that's okay. I am set. I've taken care of myself, my son, the basic needs of my life. I was happy if I dial back a few months.- Almost booked a trip to Texas because last time I was so heart hurt, I ended up drunk in Texas and couldn't find my horse. I learned back then about the custom of putting a raccoon dick in a cowboy hat. [Remember to ask what things are before you touch, kids.]
Texas- OH BIG! My son started seeing a new girl. Weird how I got so happy for him (vs protective in a fierce way). I hope she's a nice girl. Nursing student. Her family is from a much farther north place so watch me embrace her best I can to make sure my son doesn't want to move to that cold place but rather she wants to stay here. She gonna be my bestie!
- When I'm trying to get myself to feel better, I might send you a silly selfie of myself pretending to be Mermaid Man (from SpongeBob) in the cheapest way. (I'm a big kid. It's a secret.) Also, I'm sorry if you've seen this.
- Will always be true to myself, my principles, my word. Even when the BIG Bish in me wants to to do something else. (I blame my job for this - adulting.) My training, or my inherent need to influence, outweighs the bish in me, but not the brat. I require things.
- This post has also been a challenge to Mat B's lengthy posts 🫶. Missed your wonderful tales, my friend. Hope you stumble into this read and know I have, indeed, thought of you. Hope Daphne is doing well.
- #Goals got my son to react to a gif I sent him after we had a complicated exchange in which he spam texted me, (which I never was going to read...squirrel...by the 3rd screenshot of full page text images, I tapped out), so I simply said "Sir, this is a Wendy's" and then he said "bro" to me, so I dropped a gif of Ed from Good Burger.
(I hope he realizes I read none of those 8 or whatever full page text images that he sent me. Hope they weren't important. I'm sure I'll be blamed if there is some kind of consequence for him.)I feel a little awkward, like I shouldn't be here anymore, but as I do, let's FAFO. You in?
I am a poster girl with no poster
I am thirty-two flavors and then some
And I'm beyond your peripheral vision
So you might want to turn your headJust said to a friend "I never want to hide or be ashamed of the things that have made me." And that includes recent events.
Miss me?
️
Missed you.I still, to all our surprise, have >4k characters to spare.
I wanted to come back to this and just say again, I missed so many of you, and thank you for all your messages to me and the support you continue to give me.
It has overwhelmed my emotions several times this weekend because I guess I didn't think I mattered much to anyone here.So many of us go through our days "going through the motions," me included. We sometimes stay superficial. We never really appreciate what those around us are going through, sometimes not even the very people closest to us.
Life is kinda crazy. (Capitalism is likely to blame.
)Relationships sometimes come and go but those that matter, those that matter, <she intentionally reiterates>, will be long-standing; you become like trees, bending and flexing in the wind, through terrible storms, *because you have faith and trust in each other, are flexible.*
I'm grateful to be embraced by so many of you again, so quickly.
I'm grateful to know you.
Thank you for your kindness and your support.
I appreciate you.
-
I wanted to come back to this and just say again, I missed so many of you, and thank you for all your messages to me and the support you continue to give me.
It has overwhelmed my emotions several times this weekend because I guess I didn't think I mattered much to anyone here.So many of us go through our days "going through the motions," me included. We sometimes stay superficial. We never really appreciate what those around us are going through, sometimes not even the very people closest to us.
Life is kinda crazy. (Capitalism is likely to blame.
)Relationships sometimes come and go but those that matter, those that matter, <she intentionally reiterates>, will be long-standing; you become like trees, bending and flexing in the wind, through terrible storms, *because you have faith and trust in each other, are flexible.*
I'm grateful to be embraced by so many of you again, so quickly.
I'm grateful to know you.
Thank you for your kindness and your support.
I appreciate you.@Wallflower Now that you know we care, don’t forget it. I never could have anticipated quoting Sonny and Cher but “I (we) got you, babe.”
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R relay@relay.mycrowd.ca shared this topic
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@Wallflower Now that you know we care, don’t forget it. I never could have anticipated quoting Sonny and Cher but “I (we) got you, babe.”
@bjornqc so good to see you
️ -
@bjornqc so good to see you
️ @Wallflower And you, friend. I have been a cranky old bastard since I was a young man. Here, I have met people like you that mean a lot to me and I admit it surprised me - see “cranky old man”, supra. Just shout when you need us.
