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  3. “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

“Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

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  • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

    “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

    “How’s he doing.”

    “Take a seat.”

    “Oh no.”

    “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

    “Please, just give it to me straight.”

    “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

    “It has firmware?”

    “Yes.”

    “But it’s a soldering iron?”

    “Yes.”

    “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

    “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

    “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

    “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

    “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

    “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

    “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

    “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

    “But how?”

    “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

    “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

    “Would you like to see him?”

    “Not like this.”

    #microfiction

    mek2600@infosec.exchangeM This user is from outside of this forum
    mek2600@infosec.exchangeM This user is from outside of this forum
    mek2600@infosec.exchange
    wrote last edited by
    #2

    @SecureOwl I really don't think people should be making jokes like this. This is how my meat thermometer died. 😢

    otter_linnus@det.socialO guillotine_jones@beige.partyG 2 Replies Last reply
    0
    • mek2600@infosec.exchangeM mek2600@infosec.exchange

      @SecureOwl I really don't think people should be making jokes like this. This is how my meat thermometer died. 😢

      otter_linnus@det.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
      otter_linnus@det.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
      otter_linnus@det.social
      wrote last edited by
      #3

      @mek2600 @SecureOwl

      At least it's a merciful and fast death. Some gadgets suffer way longer on creeping featurism. It's unbearable to watch.

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • R relay@relay.publicsquare.global shared this topic
      • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

        “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

        “How’s he doing.”

        “Take a seat.”

        “Oh no.”

        “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

        “Please, just give it to me straight.”

        “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

        “It has firmware?”

        “Yes.”

        “But it’s a soldering iron?”

        “Yes.”

        “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

        “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

        “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

        “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

        “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

        “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

        “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

        “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

        “But how?”

        “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

        “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

        “Would you like to see him?”

        “Not like this.”

        #microfiction

        witewulf@cyberplace.socialW This user is from outside of this forum
        witewulf@cyberplace.socialW This user is from outside of this forum
        witewulf@cyberplace.social
        wrote last edited by
        #4

        @SecureOwl lots of nerds have soldering irons with firmware. Let me tell you, they are marvellous devices!

        L 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

          “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

          “How’s he doing.”

          “Take a seat.”

          “Oh no.”

          “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

          “Please, just give it to me straight.”

          “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

          “It has firmware?”

          “Yes.”

          “But it’s a soldering iron?”

          “Yes.”

          “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

          “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

          “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

          “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

          “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

          “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

          “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

          “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

          “But how?”

          “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

          “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

          “Would you like to see him?”

          “Not like this.”

          #microfiction

          fritzadalis@infosec.exchangeF This user is from outside of this forum
          fritzadalis@infosec.exchangeF This user is from outside of this forum
          fritzadalis@infosec.exchange
          wrote last edited by
          #5

          @SecureOwl @Viss
          Wait, what's wrong with the Pinecil?

          aburka@hachyderm.ioA overeducatedredneck@bitbang.socialO 2 Replies Last reply
          0
          • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

            “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

            “How’s he doing.”

            “Take a seat.”

            “Oh no.”

            “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

            “Please, just give it to me straight.”

            “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

            “It has firmware?”

            “Yes.”

            “But it’s a soldering iron?”

            “Yes.”

            “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

            “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

            “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

            “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

            “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

            “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

            “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

            “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

            “But how?”

            “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

            “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

            “Would you like to see him?”

            “Not like this.”

            #microfiction

            _ad@hachyderm.io_ This user is from outside of this forum
            _ad@hachyderm.io_ This user is from outside of this forum
            _ad@hachyderm.io
            wrote last edited by
            #6

            @SecureOwl "I'd also advise you not to post about this on social media. We've found that strangers will clamour to this sort of news and will try to tell you that their devices have firmware and they're great, they work fine, the firmware improves them. You'll want to reply, to try to help them understand, but they'll resent you and you'll exhaust yourself."

            otter_linnus@det.socialO 1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

              “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

              “How’s he doing.”

              “Take a seat.”

              “Oh no.”

              “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

              “Please, just give it to me straight.”

              “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

              “It has firmware?”

              “Yes.”

              “But it’s a soldering iron?”

              “Yes.”

              “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

              “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

              “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

              “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

              “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

              “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

              “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

              “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

              “But how?”

              “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

              “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

              “Would you like to see him?”

              “Not like this.”

              #microfiction

              katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
              katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK This user is from outside of this forum
              katzenberger@tldr.nettime.org
              wrote last edited by
              #7

              @SecureOwl

              When I was young, we didn't have "soldering irons". All we had was a rusty nail that we held between our finger tips, a candle, and old pewter mugs…

              level98@mastodon.socialL 1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

                “How’s he doing.”

                “Take a seat.”

                “Oh no.”

                “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

                “Please, just give it to me straight.”

                “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

                “It has firmware?”

                “Yes.”

                “But it’s a soldering iron?”

                “Yes.”

                “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

                “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

                “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

                “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

                “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

                “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

                “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

                “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

                “But how?”

                “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

                “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

                “Would you like to see him?”

                “Not like this.”

                #microfiction

                avatastic@avatastic.ukA This user is from outside of this forum
                avatastic@avatastic.ukA This user is from outside of this forum
                avatastic@avatastic.uk
                wrote last edited by
                #8

                @SecureOwl but he can't be dead, he's still sending me e-mails!

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • fritzadalis@infosec.exchangeF fritzadalis@infosec.exchange

                  @SecureOwl @Viss
                  Wait, what's wrong with the Pinecil?

                  aburka@hachyderm.ioA This user is from outside of this forum
                  aburka@hachyderm.ioA This user is from outside of this forum
                  aburka@hachyderm.io
                  wrote last edited by
                  #9

                  @FritzAdalis @SecureOwl @Viss firmware

                  gamesmissed@mastodon.socialG 1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • aburka@hachyderm.ioA aburka@hachyderm.io

                    @FritzAdalis @SecureOwl @Viss firmware

                    gamesmissed@mastodon.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                    gamesmissed@mastodon.socialG This user is from outside of this forum
                    gamesmissed@mastodon.social
                    wrote last edited by
                    #10

                    @aburka @FritzAdalis I have a 1st generation Pinecil, and it's always worked well. But, I've also never updated the firmware, because it's always worked well.

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • mek2600@infosec.exchangeM mek2600@infosec.exchange

                      @SecureOwl I really don't think people should be making jokes like this. This is how my meat thermometer died. 😢

                      guillotine_jones@beige.partyG This user is from outside of this forum
                      guillotine_jones@beige.partyG This user is from outside of this forum
                      guillotine_jones@beige.party
                      wrote last edited by
                      #11

                      @mek2600 @SecureOwl
                      Too soon?

                      mek2600@infosec.exchangeM 1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • guillotine_jones@beige.partyG guillotine_jones@beige.party

                        @mek2600 @SecureOwl
                        Too soon?

                        mek2600@infosec.exchangeM This user is from outside of this forum
                        mek2600@infosec.exchangeM This user is from outside of this forum
                        mek2600@infosec.exchange
                        wrote last edited by
                        #12

                        @Guillotine_Jones @SecureOwl 😥

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • fritzadalis@infosec.exchangeF fritzadalis@infosec.exchange

                          @SecureOwl @Viss
                          Wait, what's wrong with the Pinecil?

                          overeducatedredneck@bitbang.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
                          overeducatedredneck@bitbang.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
                          overeducatedredneck@bitbang.social
                          wrote last edited by
                          #13

                          @FritzAdalis @SecureOwl @Viss nothing. It's one that does the "has firmware" business right. It's the closed products that get you.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • katzenberger@tldr.nettime.orgK katzenberger@tldr.nettime.org

                            @SecureOwl

                            When I was young, we didn't have "soldering irons". All we had was a rusty nail that we held between our finger tips, a candle, and old pewter mugs…

                            level98@mastodon.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                            level98@mastodon.socialL This user is from outside of this forum
                            level98@mastodon.social
                            wrote last edited by
                            #14

                            @katzenberger @SecureOwl "A candle?... A candle!"

                            "Luxury!!"

                            "We 'ad to generate t' heat by rubbing our hands together, and... let me tell ya... that was pretty rough on little 'One-hand Billy'. "

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • witewulf@cyberplace.socialW witewulf@cyberplace.social

                              @SecureOwl lots of nerds have soldering irons with firmware. Let me tell you, they are marvellous devices!

                              L This user is from outside of this forum
                              L This user is from outside of this forum
                              leon_p_smith@ioc.exchange
                              wrote last edited by
                              #15

                              @WiteWulf @SecureOwl if you aren't using a soldering iron with some firmware on it, you really are missing out on the benefit of modern temperature control loops.

                              Generic T12 stations seem to be the best value for the buck, the precise temperature control makes a lot of otherwise tricky soldering job a piece of cake, such as surface-mount work or using lead-free solder. I don't think Hakko even makes a T12 station anymore, though they do still make T12 tips.

                              Generic C245 and C210 stations seem to be where it's at, assuming you are willing to spend a bit more, and are willing to spend more on tips. Still way less than a genuine JBC station, though.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                                “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

                                “How’s he doing.”

                                “Take a seat.”

                                “Oh no.”

                                “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

                                “Please, just give it to me straight.”

                                “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

                                “It has firmware?”

                                “Yes.”

                                “But it’s a soldering iron?”

                                “Yes.”

                                “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

                                “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

                                “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

                                “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

                                “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

                                “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

                                “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

                                “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

                                “But how?”

                                “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

                                “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

                                “Would you like to see him?”

                                “Not like this.”

                                #microfiction

                                walruths@mastodon.socialW This user is from outside of this forum
                                walruths@mastodon.socialW This user is from outside of this forum
                                walruths@mastodon.social
                                wrote last edited by
                                #16

                                @SecureOwl
                                "Please, paw, don't put old Weller down!!"

                                jfaulken@mastodon.gamedev.placeJ 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • R relay@relay.mycrowd.ca shared this topic
                                • _ad@hachyderm.io_ _ad@hachyderm.io

                                  @SecureOwl "I'd also advise you not to post about this on social media. We've found that strangers will clamour to this sort of news and will try to tell you that their devices have firmware and they're great, they work fine, the firmware improves them. You'll want to reply, to try to help them understand, but they'll resent you and you'll exhaust yourself."

                                  otter_linnus@det.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
                                  otter_linnus@det.socialO This user is from outside of this forum
                                  otter_linnus@det.social
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #17

                                  @_aD @SecureOwl
                                  You have to understand, denial is the first stage of grief.

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                                    “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

                                    “How’s he doing.”

                                    “Take a seat.”

                                    “Oh no.”

                                    “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

                                    “Please, just give it to me straight.”

                                    “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

                                    “It has firmware?”

                                    “Yes.”

                                    “But it’s a soldering iron?”

                                    “Yes.”

                                    “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

                                    “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

                                    “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

                                    “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

                                    “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

                                    “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

                                    “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

                                    “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

                                    “But how?”

                                    “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

                                    “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

                                    “Would you like to see him?”

                                    “Not like this.”

                                    #microfiction

                                    preya@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                                    preya@mastodon.socialP This user is from outside of this forum
                                    preya@mastodon.social
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #18

                                    @SecureOwl But wait, there's something that can be done: Open Source Firmware. https://ralim.github.io/IronOS/

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                                      “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

                                      “How’s he doing.”

                                      “Take a seat.”

                                      “Oh no.”

                                      “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

                                      “Please, just give it to me straight.”

                                      “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

                                      “It has firmware?”

                                      “Yes.”

                                      “But it’s a soldering iron?”

                                      “Yes.”

                                      “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

                                      “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

                                      “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

                                      “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

                                      “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

                                      “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

                                      “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

                                      “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

                                      “But how?”

                                      “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

                                      “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

                                      “Would you like to see him?”

                                      “Not like this.”

                                      #microfiction

                                      felipe@social.treehouse.systemsF This user is from outside of this forum
                                      felipe@social.treehouse.systemsF This user is from outside of this forum
                                      felipe@social.treehouse.systems
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #19

                                      @SecureOwl PID

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • secureowl@infosec.exchangeS secureowl@infosec.exchange

                                        “Hi, my name’s David, I’m one of the repair techs here, I’v been looking after your broken soldering iron today.”

                                        “How’s he doing.”

                                        “Take a seat.”

                                        “Oh no.”

                                        “Unfortunately, and there is no easy way to say this, we looked at your Iron, and, well, we found something.”

                                        “Please, just give it to me straight.”

                                        “Ok, well we found, and I’m so sorry, we found, firmware.”

                                        “It has firmware?”

                                        “Yes.”

                                        “But it’s a soldering iron?”

                                        “Yes.”

                                        “So there is nothing you can do for it?”

                                        “Unfortunately, when a tool has firmware, it’s always fatal. There is nothing we can do. I am very sorry.”

                                        “But, it’s so young. I only got it like a month or so ago?”

                                        “Sadly, we often see firmware on younger tools.”

                                        “But it was fine yesterday, like totally fine?!”

                                        “With any kind of firmware, it can just, you know, stop working.”

                                        “What am I gonna tell the kids?!”

                                        “Obviously you know your kids better than me, but as a general rule, I always tell people that kids appreciate honesty, and are more resilient than you might think. Be honest.”

                                        “But how?”

                                        “Just tell them, you were drawn in by the features, rather than just a functional thing, so that’s why you got it.”

                                        “Ah man this is going to be rough.”

                                        “Would you like to see him?”

                                        “Not like this.”

                                        #microfiction

                                        G This user is from outside of this forum
                                        G This user is from outside of this forum
                                        guenther@chaos.social
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #20

                                        @SecureOwl that last line is so cruel, who says something like that

                                        markhburton@mstdn.socialM 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • G guenther@chaos.social

                                          @SecureOwl that last line is so cruel, who says something like that

                                          markhburton@mstdn.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                          markhburton@mstdn.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                          markhburton@mstdn.social
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #21

                                          @guenther @SecureOwl
                                          My first soldering iron as an electronics mad lad was made for me by a toolmaker.
                                          He worked at a leading research centre.
                                          They hadn't even thought of firmware then.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
                                          0
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