<![CDATA[Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!!]]>Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!!

A “Biscuit Bandit” is being hunted in North Carolina, after the desperado broke into a Popeyes at 5 a.m. and started cooking items from the menu, according to police.
https://www.newsobserver.com/news/state/north-carolina/article315866111.html?link_source=ta_bluesky_link&taid=6a1181be7aed7a0001922044&utm_campaign=trueanthem&utm_medium=social&utm_source=bluesky

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/topic/df417842-f27b-4045-b4a2-4979c50a5f2b/crime-in-america-is-out-of-controlRSS for NodeMon, 25 May 2026 10:39:37 GMTSat, 23 May 2026 17:53:54 GMT60<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 19:08:30 GMT]]>@cstross I figure this goes under 'shoplifting for necessities' rules, if you thought you saw the Biscuit Bandit, no, you didn't. 😹

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://wandering.shop/users/Tuftears/statuses/116625461128978925https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://wandering.shop/users/Tuftears/statuses/116625461128978925Sat, 23 May 2026 19:08:30 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 19:07:34 GMT]]>@cstross wait! They stuck around long enough to cook the things? Not just a grab and go? Wow!

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://vis.social/users/kristinHenry/statuses/116625457429260748https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://vis.social/users/kristinHenry/statuses/116625457429260748Sat, 23 May 2026 19:07:34 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 18:56:24 GMT]]>@cstross the load-bearing
phrase here is "from the menu". either:
- popeyes is so set up that you can *only* cook items that are on the menu (eg, it's all frozen)
- this is an ex-employee
- this is someone with no imagination whatsoever

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://social.tchncs.de/users/fishidwardrobe/statuses/116625413520112118https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://social.tchncs.de/users/fishidwardrobe/statuses/116625413520112118Sat, 23 May 2026 18:56:24 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 18:50:30 GMT]]>@cstross Fallen Angels (1995)

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://infosec.exchange/users/kaced/statuses/116625390320908408https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://infosec.exchange/users/kaced/statuses/116625390320908408Sat, 23 May 2026 18:50:30 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 18:31:58 GMT]]>@cstross oh the horror, the depravity! What kind of sick monster would commit property crime just to eat a little food? The good news, at least, is that all of the poor mom-n-pop business known as Popeyes got a little free advertising via this news story. Take that, you evil, hungry villain!

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://hachyderm.io/users/sillyCoelophysis/statuses/116625317452831774https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://hachyderm.io/users/sillyCoelophysis/statuses/116625317452831774Sat, 23 May 2026 18:31:58 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 18:30:45 GMT]]>@cstross Honestly, breaking in at 5 AM just to ship a fresh batch of biscuits sounds exactly like my sleep schedule when a new iOS beta breaks my database sync. Sometimes the urge to deploy is unstoppable.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://indieweb.social/ap/users/116612219711864167/statuses/116625312649182241https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://indieweb.social/ap/users/116612219711864167/statuses/116625312649182241Sat, 23 May 2026 18:30:45 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 18:21:26 GMT]]>@cstross They are quite tasty.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://cosocial.ca/ap/users/116274797274577715/statuses/116625276031347996https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://cosocial.ca/ap/users/116274797274577715/statuses/116625276031347996Sat, 23 May 2026 18:21:26 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 18:15:52 GMT]]>@cstross @skinnylatte one of the guys my dad went to high school with (I guess about 50 years ago now) used to break into a local hamburger shop, cook himself dinner and leave before it opened after he got kicked out of his parents’ house

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://follow.coryd.dev/users/cory/statuses/116625254128495314https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://follow.coryd.dev/users/cory/statuses/116625254128495314Sat, 23 May 2026 18:15:52 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 18:14:56 GMT]]>@cstross "Nobody ever broke into a Chic-fil-A and stopped to eat" LOL!

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://wandering.shop/users/epicdemiologist/statuses/116625250480661577https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://wandering.shop/users/epicdemiologist/statuses/116625250480661577Sat, 23 May 2026 18:14:56 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 18:07:18 GMT]]>@cstross I’m pretty sure @icetsvu mentioned this guy in an episode. Though perhaps there he had burglarised a Popeyes with a rubber chicken instead or something

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/acb/statuses/116625220485298134https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/users/acb/statuses/116625220485298134Sat, 23 May 2026 18:07:18 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to Crime in America is OUT OF CONTROL!!! on Sat, 23 May 2026 18:05:49 GMT]]>@cstross

Not real biscuits, though, so no real grounds for concern.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://ohai.social/ap/users/115769947899530117/statuses/116625214646582301https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://ohai.social/ap/users/115769947899530117/statuses/116625214646582301Sat, 23 May 2026 18:05:49 GMT