<![CDATA[I am not One of the Good Trans.]]>I am not One of the Good Trans. I have always said this.

What I mean is: I reject the framing that picks and chooses "acceptable" people, and rejects and invalidates others.
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]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/topic/cc2578f0-7f19-493b-8398-ee6249fd48ed/i-am-not-one-of-the-good-trans.RSS for NodeWed, 15 Apr 2026 23:26:26 GMTSat, 11 Apr 2026 18:55:07 GMT60<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 23:08:02 GMT]]>@Tattie rare take maybe but i Did choose this life, this way of being, seeing that it was absolutely an option not to, to try to conform or assimilate, and felt rather that it's safer in the front, and that the overton window needed torn a new one, in whatever terms I might've had at the time for similar sentiment

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/ap/users/116275689341624154/statuses/116388585946748724https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/ap/users/116275689341624154/statuses/116388585946748724Sat, 11 Apr 2026 23:08:02 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 23:04:27 GMT]]>@Tattie get eviller

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/ap/users/116275689341624154/statuses/116388571879041826https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.social/ap/users/116275689341624154/statuses/116388571879041826Sat, 11 Apr 2026 23:04:27 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 23:02:41 GMT]]>@faithisleaping @Tattie Reason I have imposter syndrome number #507: I've never even seen a Blรฅhaj in real life. I don't even know how to say it!

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mstdn.social/users/BernieDoesIt/statuses/116388564932749064https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mstdn.social/users/BernieDoesIt/statuses/116388564932749064Sat, 11 Apr 2026 23:02:41 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 22:44:17 GMT]]>@Tattie Ironically (if that's the right word), my conception of ideal femininity has always been firmly rooted in the idea of rebelling against conventional social expectations of femininity -- and my attraction to it was never about clothing, because I liked it better when girls wore neutral-to-masc clothing. That's what I found attractive and what I secretly wished I looked like.

(FWIW: the obstacle for me was that I had been taught that gender was entirely socialized, therefore the idea of wanting to be a different gender was a logical contradiction and also probably indicative of secretly being a rapist or something.)

(And anecdata, in case it's useful: I never went through a Nazi phase; was always a feminist. I never even went through the more common phase of trying extra-hard to perform masculinity -- I always hated it, knew I hated it, and saw nothing wrong with that.)

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://toot.cat/users/woozle/statuses/116388492564092560https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://toot.cat/users/woozle/statuses/116388492564092560Sat, 11 Apr 2026 22:44:17 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 22:03:47 GMT]]>@ada I hear you.

I love my trans self now, and I wouldn't choose to be different. But only because that would feel like undoing myself. Replacing myself.

But before I knew what I was? I wouldn't have volunteered to be trans. I would've chosen an easy(er) life. ๐Ÿ˜ฎโ€๐Ÿ’จ

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116388333289521222https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116388333289521222Sat, 11 Apr 2026 22:03:47 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:39:09 GMT]]>@Tattie
This last made me laugh, and you've made me think. Thank you.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://hachyderm.io/users/lysdexic/statuses/116388236458004483https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://hachyderm.io/users/lysdexic/statuses/116388236458004483Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:39:09 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:24:00 GMT]]>@Tattie Had you asked me as a child/young adult"would you rather be a girl/woman" I probably wouldn't have dared to say yes, but it never popped into my head because it just didn't register as a possibility. Basically everything after LG in LGBT+ was a cultural blind spot. And yet looking back I now do recognize some of my bad feelings back then were gender dysphoria. But at the time I either felt shame or I brushed it aside as normal. It just never came to that conscious "I am a girl" thought.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://gamedev.lgbt/ap/users/116216860616381371/statuses/116388176886461207https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://gamedev.lgbt/ap/users/116216860616381371/statuses/116388176886461207Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:24:00 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:20:29 GMT]]>@Tattie As I periodically sum it up offline: a key part of "understanding" trans people is understanding the part where we're people.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://chaosfem.tw/users/KatS/statuses/116388163044936161https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://chaosfem.tw/users/KatS/statuses/116388163044936161Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:20:29 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:17:39 GMT]]>@introvertcatto @faithisleaping @Tattie It just comes naturally to some of us. I'm even autistic, just to rub salt into the wound ๐Ÿ˜›

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://chaosfem.tw/users/KatS/statuses/116388151905195873https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://chaosfem.tw/users/KatS/statuses/116388151905195873Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:17:39 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:14:25 GMT]]>@Tattie Tattie, what an amazing thread. Some of those parts must have been very personal, thanks for sharing!

Another example of a trans person existing in a conservative space: me as a child. It was years after leaving my conservative church and becoming ever more leftist and progressive before I even found out trans people existed and (gasp) I was one!

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://gamedev.lgbt/ap/users/116216860616381371/statuses/116388139176021442https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://gamedev.lgbt/ap/users/116216860616381371/statuses/116388139176021442Sat, 11 Apr 2026 21:14:25 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 20:34:09 GMT]]>@peachfiend a decade before Blรฅhaj was even produced!

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387980896572980https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387980896572980Sat, 11 Apr 2026 20:34:09 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 20:32:16 GMT]]>@Tattie ๐Ÿ™€

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://chaos.social/users/jay_peper/statuses/116387973485525920https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://chaos.social/users/jay_peper/statuses/116387973485525920Sat, 11 Apr 2026 20:32:16 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 20:25:43 GMT]]>@Tattie TBF i had no idea about the blรฅhaj thing until i joined mastodon, but have had at least SOME idea i was trans since like 1998.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.sdf.org/users/peachfiend/statuses/116387947707959486https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mastodon.sdf.org/users/peachfiend/statuses/116387947707959486Sat, 11 Apr 2026 20:25:43 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:54:06 GMT]]>@Tattie *ponders*

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mstdn.social/users/pauamma/statuses/116387823376106401https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://mstdn.social/users/pauamma/statuses/116387823376106401Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:54:06 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:33:55 GMT]]>@Tattie I remember the TS/TV divide of the eighties/nineties. I was one of the "good ones". It was all illegal so the two circles did overlap a bit for safety. On the TS side we had to meet very invasive criteria and we certainly had to avoid giving off a TV vibe. Sexuality had to be completely repressed. Full SRS was a legal requirement. The process took me away from any sense of authenticity and probably put another scoop of trauma in my head.

The TS/TV archetypes did so much damage. I am sorry you were misdirected onto such a long and painful journey.

I agree that people's private explorations shouldn't be used to attack anyone, even if they happen to be married to a reprehensible MAGA.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://autistics.life/users/SecondUniverse/statuses/116387743996991709https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://autistics.life/users/SecondUniverse/statuses/116387743996991709Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:33:55 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:32:35 GMT]]>@Tattie@eldritch.cafe โ€‹โ€‹ Thank you for sharing. I knew I wasn't alone, but it's always nice to hear people living the same things.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://transfem.social/notes/akyaq6lolgmt000yhttps://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://transfem.social/notes/akyaq6lolgmt000ySat, 11 Apr 2026 19:32:35 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:31:04 GMT]]>@introvertcatto @faithisleaping all hail the Blรฅhaj train!

.
๐Ÿš‚ ๐Ÿšƒ๐Ÿšƒ๐Ÿšƒ๐Ÿšƒ๐Ÿšƒ

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387732785475957https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387732785475957Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:31:04 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:28:26 GMT]]>@Tattie The tragedy of not having access to Blรฅhajโ€ฆ or trains.

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://wandering.shop/users/feorag/statuses/116387722455781800https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://wandering.shop/users/feorag/statuses/116387722455781800Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:28:26 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:26:08 GMT]]>@faithisleaping @Tattie HOW CAN THEY NOT LIKE TRAINS????? ๐Ÿš‚๐Ÿšƒ๐Ÿšƒ๐Ÿšƒ๐Ÿšƒ๐Ÿšƒ

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://lgbtqia.space/users/introvertcatto/statuses/116387713436110749https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://lgbtqia.space/users/introvertcatto/statuses/116387713436110749Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:26:08 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:22:04 GMT]]>And there are closeted trans people out there in conservative-fascist circles, who are pretty much indistinguishable in everyday life from the worst sort of misogynist cis white dudesโ€” just like I once made myself indistinguishable from a shy geeky bearded dude. (And acted as one.)

And they for sure are so definitely Not One of the Good Trans that they make me look like One of the Good Trans.

And yet we are all trans.
Fin/

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387697438622960https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387697438622960Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:22:04 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:21:53 GMT]]>@Tattie Blasphemy! All hail Blรฅhaj!

]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://anarres.family/users/faithisleaping/statuses/116387696673422832https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://anarres.family/users/faithisleaping/statuses/116387696673422832Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:21:53 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:20:16 GMT]]>Similarly, trans Reddit thinks that trans people are some way, and trans Bluesky thinks that trans people are some way, and trans Fedi thinks that trans people are some way, but these are illusions.

I tell you, there are trans people out there who have never hugged a Blรฅhaj and don't even like trains.
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]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387690340941607https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387690340941607Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:20:16 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:19:37 GMT]]>I think of the horrible transphobic trope that trans people inevitably go thru a "Nazi phase" before coming out.

Where does that trope originate? 4chan.

Kinda unsurprising that a website full of edgelords would end up concluding that every trans person is similarly an edgelord, because those are the ones they meet.
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]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387687775528464https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387687775528464Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:19:37 GMT<![CDATA[Reply to I am not One of the Good Trans. on Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:18:41 GMT]]>Maybe it's past time to admit that "the trans community" is a fiction. Oh, there are trans communities, some of them wonderful. But none of them definitive.
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]]>https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387684092854597https://board.circlewithadot.net/post/https://eldritch.cafe/users/Tattie/statuses/116387684092854597Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:18:41 GMT