I get royally pissed that I was forced to make an eternally-binding spiritual contract when I was 8 years old and literally forced into religious schooling and indoctrination from birth. And almost nobody is questioning the age-appropriateness of that.

Its a good exercise because I hadn't made that mental parallel before. It will be the first thing out of my mouth the next time some boomer brings up that bs argument.

1. Christians should be barred from practicing Christianity in front of children

Christians are unnatural and creepy. I get icked out every time one of them opens their mouth with a sermon. It's fine to think you're Christian, but don't shove that ideology down my throat. Or come near my children.

Thousands of arrests and convictions have been documented of Christian clergy and members grooming and abusing children within their religious environments. They also recruit children from outside their communities.

I'm not a tyrant. You can practice your Christian lifestyle. Just keep it to yourself, stay out of my schools and communities, and we'll be fine.

2. Ban Christian books from schools and public libraries.

Every child is born nonchristian. This is a biological fact. No child is born knowing God's name or how to pray. It's unnatural. Kids have to be indoctrinated and baptized to become Christian, which isn't age appropriate. They're clearly trying to indoctrinate children into their sick lifestyle. It's grooming, plain and simple. At least let children grow up so they can consent.

3. Christians should be banned from playing sports.

Christians can just pray to their god to gain an unfair advantage over other competitors, especially nonchristians and atheists. Prayer by competitors or fans from any religious background should be unacceptable to ensure a level playing field.

But since we can't tell when someone is praying, we may just have to ban Christians from sports altogether. You can play sports, just play with other Christians so that everyone has the same supernatural advantage.

4. Make Christians use a designated bathroom.

Christians are lurking around bathrooms just waiting to baptize any unwary heathens. All they have to do is wait until you're sitting over the toilet or washing your hands, then they just shove you under and say:

InthenameofthefatherthesonandholyspiritIbaptizethee!

and they've got you bound to their god and converted to the lifestyle.

I'm not saying Christians shouldn't use public restrooms. Only that they should use Christian bathrooms among other Christians so they can't baptize anyone against their will.

Conclusion:

As you can see, I don't *hate* Christians. My entire family is Christian. I just recognize it as the mental illness it is. I want them to keep their delusions confined to their churches, away from my kids, out of schools and libraries, and out of sports. These are reasonable suggestions.